You probably know to ask yourself, “What do I want?” Here’s a better question (qz.com)

This is probably one of the smartest questions I've come across in a while, and emphasizes a perspective I've never really thought of before.

To facilitate the discussion, the better question according to the article is: "What pain do you want in your life? What are you willing to struggle for? Because that seems to be a greater determinant of how our lives turn out."