Whoa there. You're not even mentioning that he gives an example for each of these. Besides, he himself is an example of this; as he says, instead of complaining about music distribution, he started a distributor.
Is it not the case that our minds often like to tell us bleak stories that turn out to be far removed from reality? So maybe, reality doesn't necessarily need to be as complex as our minds might try to make it?
Hate the game, not the player? ;) Seems to make sense, just take the better side of a trade. Think the market's going to crash? Short it. Might be trickier to buy CDS if you don't believe in the mortgage market, but apparently someone did that!
Exactly - plus of course, when you run into something that is stopping you from doing what you want to do, it is highly likely that other people have the same problem - you've just discovered a potential market! Of course, if you are not an entrepreneur, this discovery may not interest you very much - you just want to do your thing...
Granted, not everything works this way. Far from everything. But it's a start, right? You can't change the system overnight, but you can change how you view the system in an instant. Maybe your new approach will fail. With a big and complicated enough proverbial stick, it's nearly assured.
But once you've taken the step of removing the arbitrary obstacles from your path, only the real ones remain. Which may sound a little depressing, but hey, once you're this far, why stop?
You have a point. But the $5 for new accounts only helps if moderators ban undesirable accounts. The $5 is a way to give the banhammer a bit more meaning. are you prepared to ban people for commenting like the above?
Personally, I don't think that harsh criticism is necessarily a bad thing. (I mean, the aforementioned comment was perhaps written without reading the article, I mean it doesn't make much sense in the context of the author actually doing those things... but I personally don't think that negative comments are always bad things.)
One thing I hate about the real world is that nobody ever calls me on my bullshit. I'm not saying I think K5 is the optimal form, but in many ways it's better than a place where everyone is always encouraging me and telling me what a great guy I am.
- You're really trying to inspire some kind of substantiative, rational discussion and not just verbal sparring. K5 sort of was and sort of wasn't. It was both a discussion-place and a playground. HN is supposed to be much more a discussion-place.
- The harsh criticism doesn't give the poster any means to fight back. "Motivational drivel" isn't a criticism that someone can argue against, nor is "This kind of comment makes me wish we had a moratorium on signups or a $5 fee." So that criticism is useless for promoting discussion, or even for promoting any kind of further on-topic thought at all. It routes the conversation toward more flames.
I strongly prefer total Mad Max flamewar arguments, but it tends to drive away a lot of people who have a (well-meaning) tendency to try to take any criticism, and deal with any critics. I mean, you see threads on here complaining that people downvote things without explanation! Obviously the posters of those threads would be gone in an instant if trolls started outright insulting them all over the place.
If you're young and you're depressed by the phrase "It's all about who you know", I really encourage you follow this quick, life-changing script: email two or three people in your town that can help you, and offer to buy them lunch so you can pick their brain. It's very easy to meet people, and you don't have to be fake, politic, or even very outgoing.
Good advice! Maybe avoid the phrase "pick your brain" when you ask, though. It's much more mutually-beneficial to offer up an interesting two-way conversation about a subject you're both interested in.
("You're doing some fascinating things with crowdsourcing. It's something I've been diving into as well, and have some ideas for you. At very least it'll be a good conversation. Can I treat you to a quick after-work drink at Tres Agaves across the street from your office some day next week?")
Honestly, I think the 'pick your brain' approach would work better in a lot of cases. Particularly if you are inexperienced, young, etc. Personally, I would almost never turn down a request to meet from someone who wanted to ask me for help, advice, introductions, etc, but as soon as someone says they have ideas for me I get pretty suspicious. Nine times out of ten that guy is trying to sell you something.
Of course, if it's something you can legitimately add value to (e.g. you actually have been diving into crowdsourcing or whatever) then your approach may be the way to go.
Great post.
By the way, if anyone actually wants to buy me a drink at Tres Agaves (which is very close to my office), please let me know :)
really? I mean I suppose it depends on the person. Personally, I find being on the receiving end of obvious flattery to be distinctly uncomfortable, and I'm beginning to get a fair amount of that myself. Personally, (and I think this might be true of most people who are primarily technical) if a less experienced person wants my help, the best way to get it is to ask an interesting question in a way that shows you have made experience-appropriate progress solving the problem yourself. (That, or offer to work for me for cheap.)
I am admittedly not primarily technical, but I don't see that as relevant here. If someone actually has a legitimate way to add value to the person they're asking for help from, then that's great. Often that's not going to be the case though, and trying to fake that is (for me) a recipe for disaster.
To go back to the example of offering an idea to help with whatever, that's really just going to be a waste of time for most people. I'd much prefer the person simply say they want x/y/z and would like to meet or talk. Call it obvious flattery, it's also honest and efficient.
"if a less experienced person wants my help, the best way to get it is to ask an interesting question in a way that shows you have made experience-appropriate progress solving the problem yourself. "
So, I'm not trying to say a less experienced person should come up with something to try to help the more experienced person; I'm saying that if a less experienced person wants me to help them, they should show that they are likely to get it done with minimal hand holding from me. Helping other people is fun, but I'm only going to do it if it's not that much work for me and it's only satisfying if they pull through and get the thing done.
In a way I may be agreeing with your initial post; it's just that you don't flatter technical people by complementing them; that just makes us feel weird. you flatter technical people by asking their opinion/knowledge, or letting them help you in ways that are easy for them. (the line between flattery and asking for free help is a thin one. A lot of that depends on the more experienced person's assessment of the less experienced person's potential and ability. it also has to do with the level of responsibility expected of the more experienced person; if you expect me to keep track, organize, or follow through on something, that's /work/ and I expect to get paid. If you want to ask my opinion on how to solve an interesting question, that's fun, and it's somewhat flattering that you think my yammerings are useful. a paper could be written on when it is good to ask for free help, and when it is bad to do so. )
"you don't flatter technical people by complementing them; that just makes us feel weird"
Honestly it sounds like we are very nearly on the same page, though this quote is a bit odd to me. I don't think it's fair to define "technical people" by saying that compliments make them feel weird. I should point out that I'm not the one that has talked about flattering as a tactic.
I think we completely agree on having something interesting to talk about as a helpful quality.
There's another important benefit from doing this. When you don't know any really successful people, its easy to build the idea up in your mind that such people must possess superhuman powers of some kind. When you get to know a few of them you see that they're not so unlike you after all, and their success begins to seem much more like something you might be able to replicate yourself.
This is also an exercise in Four Hour Workweek. It's also how I met Craig of Craiglist -- it was literally "Hey, you spoke at my commencement and I'm a programmer in the Bay Area. Want to get coffee?" Now if someone has advice on how to not become starstruck when they actually meet these big shots, I'm all ears :)
I really enjoy reading Derek's posts. The culture that surrounds starting a company is often negative and requires a lot of effort to really push through. It's always nice to get a reminder that there is some hope and to get a refresher that has some broader perspective.
I think the last part is really important. Even when a horrible system works in your favor, it behooves you to do what they can to improve the system, or at least prop the door open for others.
:-) Hacker News comments are really humbling. So many brilliant people here that really call you on your shit in an intelligent way. You can never mistakenly think you're brighter than most. Most of the time I feel, “Wow. I have nothing to add.”
"Wow. I have nothing to add." is how I feel most of the time as well. In your case, however, the things you add are almost always insightful. It's good to have you around!
I can relate to the feeling when people suggest that, "It's all about who you know". The well connected seem to have a monopoly on relationships that matter.
I really admire your quick thinking but I feel that you don't always have an opportunity. I have been to lectures where as the lecture is over, the speakers seem to be escorted out.
Establishing a personal connection is difficult. One of the things I love about HN is how accessible everyone is, but not everyone provides a point of contact.
In a lot of cases, the guy at the other end of the stick is going to do his damndest to make sure you stay where you are, because he likes being wealthy/in charge/whatever.
The goal isn't to switch ends with the guy holding the "clean" end, it is to find all the other people who are sick of getting the shitty end of the stick, and then provide good service to them.
Pretty soon the guy offering the shitty end will wonder where all his consumers[1] went.
[1] I hate that term. It invariably is a signal that whatever is being offered is shitty.
"if you don't like what someone else is doing to you, become one of them yourself"
Someone is bullying my family. I'm to become a bully and harass their family? This seems childish at best and possibly an extremely harmful way to go about working through hardships.
I think the idea is more along the lines of: "if you don't like the way a service is being provided, don't sit around and complain, try to do it better". It's a decent idea, but I think you're setting up for failure if you try to live this way. We can't all create new cable companies, new phone companies, new banks, and new ISPs just because we don't like the way the existing ones work.
I can see the idea leading to a severe lack of focus. Imagine trying to rebuild something everytime you notice that you don't like the way the existing infrastracture works.
I would suggest instead of rebuilding and likely becoming that which you despise, find a way around the problem so that you're no longer affected by it, or at least reduce your exposure.
Obviously, some problems are harder than others. However, many of us come from backgrounds of some privilege. You have a computer and likely have the capacity to program. You speak English, the current language of commerce, and you likely live in a country where capital is available. You were born on at least first base.
That means you're in a position to gather the resources to make a difference in these problems, even if you can't start today.
It seems like it all comes down to what happens after the lecture from the BMI guy. He gets his card and then actually calls him.
I'm think if I was in this situation, I wouldn't capitalize on this and just shove the card in a drawer - having no clue what to actually call the guy about, or be too afraid to ask for something.
"Shitty sticks" are usually a result of disadvantageous power dynamics, often set in place by the mistakes of previous generations, and therefore not so easily flippable, given the massive number of people who benefit from keeping them in position.
Take, for example, the relationship between VCs and entrepreneurs. VCs make entrepreneurs pay legal expenses, often ask for outrageous terms and returns (participating preferred, multiple liquidation preferences), and tend to demand such a degree of power as to ruin the company. That's, without debate, a shitty stick. The simplistic solution, "become a VC", doesn't make any sense. 1. Most entrepreneurs don't want to be VCs, and 2. most of them can't join that club.
> That's, without debate, a shitty stick. The simplistic solution, "become a VC", doesn't make any sense. 1. Most entrepreneurs don't want to be VCs, and 2. most of them can't join that club.
Well, the examples Derek gave were of starting a bank or becoming a distributor, but that's not the only way to flip the stick. When you've got a rough idea, an unproven business plan, and some smart but unproven people you're going to get bad terms, because the vast majority of rough ideas, unproven business plans, and smart but unproven people's companies flame out.
You could flip that around by working up any of those - turn your rough idea into a concrete, functional product. Prove the business plan (easiest way is revenues). And then after you've had some successes under your belt, you get money at great terms in the future.
The person with less leverage always gets the shit end of the stick. There's usually a lot more smart-but-unproven people with hazy unproven ideas that want financing than there is venture money to go around. Hence, bad terms. But there's also nowhere near enough companies raising money on a solid, proven growth trajectory being run by credible people. If you get that going on, you can raise crazy amounts of money on good terms.
"Flip the stick" means you don't have to accept the position of lower leverage and the bad terms that come with it, the shit end of the stick. There's more ways to accomplish that than just "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em".
There's usually a lot more smart-but-unproven people with hazy unproven ideas that want financing than there is venture money to go around. Hence, bad terms.
Right, but bad VC terms shouldn't even exist. There are a lot of bad ideas out there and a few good ones. VCs are "supposed" to be the ones who can pick out the good deals; that's why they get paid their high salaries. If the deal is good, the terms should be good because the VC wants the founders to have high morale and a successful company. If the deal is bad, the VC shouldn't fund it at all.
I wouldn't be insulted or offended if a VC rejected me. I'd expect quite a few rejections. Multiple liquidation preferences are an insult; it says "we think you're fucking pathetic; here are some scraps".
52 comments
[ 3.5 ms ] story [ 101 ms ] threadA willingness to oversimplify the world certainly makes it a lot easier to write the kind of motivational drivel that this post aspires towards.
Is it not the case that our minds often like to tell us bleak stories that turn out to be far removed from reality? So maybe, reality doesn't necessarily need to be as complex as our minds might try to make it?
But once you've taken the step of removing the arbitrary obstacles from your path, only the real ones remain. Which may sound a little depressing, but hey, once you're this far, why stop?
Personally, I don't think that harsh criticism is necessarily a bad thing. (I mean, the aforementioned comment was perhaps written without reading the article, I mean it doesn't make much sense in the context of the author actually doing those things... but I personally don't think that negative comments are always bad things.)
One thing I hate about the real world is that nobody ever calls me on my bullshit. I'm not saying I think K5 is the optimal form, but in many ways it's better than a place where everyone is always encouraging me and telling me what a great guy I am.
- You're really trying to inspire some kind of substantiative, rational discussion and not just verbal sparring. K5 sort of was and sort of wasn't. It was both a discussion-place and a playground. HN is supposed to be much more a discussion-place.
- The harsh criticism doesn't give the poster any means to fight back. "Motivational drivel" isn't a criticism that someone can argue against, nor is "This kind of comment makes me wish we had a moratorium on signups or a $5 fee." So that criticism is useless for promoting discussion, or even for promoting any kind of further on-topic thought at all. It routes the conversation toward more flames.
I strongly prefer total Mad Max flamewar arguments, but it tends to drive away a lot of people who have a (well-meaning) tendency to try to take any criticism, and deal with any critics. I mean, you see threads on here complaining that people downvote things without explanation! Obviously the posters of those threads would be gone in an instant if trolls started outright insulting them all over the place.
("You're doing some fascinating things with crowdsourcing. It's something I've been diving into as well, and have some ideas for you. At very least it'll be a good conversation. Can I treat you to a quick after-work drink at Tres Agaves across the street from your office some day next week?")
Of course, if it's something you can legitimately add value to (e.g. you actually have been diving into crowdsourcing or whatever) then your approach may be the way to go.
Great post.
By the way, if anyone actually wants to buy me a drink at Tres Agaves (which is very close to my office), please let me know :)
To go back to the example of offering an idea to help with whatever, that's really just going to be a waste of time for most people. I'd much prefer the person simply say they want x/y/z and would like to meet or talk. Call it obvious flattery, it's also honest and efficient.
So, I'm not trying to say a less experienced person should come up with something to try to help the more experienced person; I'm saying that if a less experienced person wants me to help them, they should show that they are likely to get it done with minimal hand holding from me. Helping other people is fun, but I'm only going to do it if it's not that much work for me and it's only satisfying if they pull through and get the thing done.
In a way I may be agreeing with your initial post; it's just that you don't flatter technical people by complementing them; that just makes us feel weird. you flatter technical people by asking their opinion/knowledge, or letting them help you in ways that are easy for them. (the line between flattery and asking for free help is a thin one. A lot of that depends on the more experienced person's assessment of the less experienced person's potential and ability. it also has to do with the level of responsibility expected of the more experienced person; if you expect me to keep track, organize, or follow through on something, that's /work/ and I expect to get paid. If you want to ask my opinion on how to solve an interesting question, that's fun, and it's somewhat flattering that you think my yammerings are useful. a paper could be written on when it is good to ask for free help, and when it is bad to do so. )
Honestly it sounds like we are very nearly on the same page, though this quote is a bit odd to me. I don't think it's fair to define "technical people" by saying that compliments make them feel weird. I should point out that I'm not the one that has talked about flattering as a tactic.
I think we completely agree on having something interesting to talk about as a helpful quality.
Reciprocity: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Cialdini
It's such a simple thing to do and at the very least will give you something to take pause on or motivate you to get through the rest of the week.
I really admire your quick thinking but I feel that you don't always have an opportunity. I have been to lectures where as the lecture is over, the speakers seem to be escorted out.
Establishing a personal connection is difficult. One of the things I love about HN is how accessible everyone is, but not everyone provides a point of contact.
Pretty soon the guy offering the shitty end will wonder where all his consumers[1] went.
[1] I hate that term. It invariably is a signal that whatever is being offered is shitty.
Oh, wait.
Someone is bullying my family. I'm to become a bully and harass their family? This seems childish at best and possibly an extremely harmful way to go about working through hardships.
I think the idea is more along the lines of: "if you don't like the way a service is being provided, don't sit around and complain, try to do it better". It's a decent idea, but I think you're setting up for failure if you try to live this way. We can't all create new cable companies, new phone companies, new banks, and new ISPs just because we don't like the way the existing ones work.
I can see the idea leading to a severe lack of focus. Imagine trying to rebuild something everytime you notice that you don't like the way the existing infrastracture works.
I would suggest instead of rebuilding and likely becoming that which you despise, find a way around the problem so that you're no longer affected by it, or at least reduce your exposure.
>(Then clean it, so it's not shitty for anyone else again.)
That means you're in a position to gather the resources to make a difference in these problems, even if you can't start today.
I'm think if I was in this situation, I wouldn't capitalize on this and just shove the card in a drawer - having no clue what to actually call the guy about, or be too afraid to ask for something.
"Shitty sticks" are usually a result of disadvantageous power dynamics, often set in place by the mistakes of previous generations, and therefore not so easily flippable, given the massive number of people who benefit from keeping them in position.
Take, for example, the relationship between VCs and entrepreneurs. VCs make entrepreneurs pay legal expenses, often ask for outrageous terms and returns (participating preferred, multiple liquidation preferences), and tend to demand such a degree of power as to ruin the company. That's, without debate, a shitty stick. The simplistic solution, "become a VC", doesn't make any sense. 1. Most entrepreneurs don't want to be VCs, and 2. most of them can't join that club.
Well, the examples Derek gave were of starting a bank or becoming a distributor, but that's not the only way to flip the stick. When you've got a rough idea, an unproven business plan, and some smart but unproven people you're going to get bad terms, because the vast majority of rough ideas, unproven business plans, and smart but unproven people's companies flame out.
You could flip that around by working up any of those - turn your rough idea into a concrete, functional product. Prove the business plan (easiest way is revenues). And then after you've had some successes under your belt, you get money at great terms in the future.
The person with less leverage always gets the shit end of the stick. There's usually a lot more smart-but-unproven people with hazy unproven ideas that want financing than there is venture money to go around. Hence, bad terms. But there's also nowhere near enough companies raising money on a solid, proven growth trajectory being run by credible people. If you get that going on, you can raise crazy amounts of money on good terms.
"Flip the stick" means you don't have to accept the position of lower leverage and the bad terms that come with it, the shit end of the stick. There's more ways to accomplish that than just "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em".
Right, but bad VC terms shouldn't even exist. There are a lot of bad ideas out there and a few good ones. VCs are "supposed" to be the ones who can pick out the good deals; that's why they get paid their high salaries. If the deal is good, the terms should be good because the VC wants the founders to have high morale and a successful company. If the deal is bad, the VC shouldn't fund it at all.
I wouldn't be insulted or offended if a VC rejected me. I'd expect quite a few rejections. Multiple liquidation preferences are an insult; it says "we think you're fucking pathetic; here are some scraps".