Facebook Alternative: Ideas?

I am looking for a way to communicate with my friend/family/social network (messages, posts, photos, video)done on my terms with 100% total control of my information. I have my own server so I am looking for a grassroots solution which I can install and use. I then want to be able to share information with others who have a similar system set up on their server. No intermediary controlling our information -- just server A and B.

Does anyone know if anything like this exists? (I am not referring to identica or the current 4 college student Disparia* thingy)

thanks

edit: if people have any other ideas on designing a free facebook alternative where the user has more control over his/her personal information please contribute your ideas!