Ask HN: Does having a family makes you less of a startup material?

I recently had a daughter and I've found that there's 2 things going on:

1) I'm generally more focused and efficient when I work since time is more scarce.

2) I'm more motivated now since I've got the little one depending on me. The instinct to provide for another is a powerful one.

It doesn't make you any less of startup material at all, it just puts you in a different environment.

The original advice comes because when you're young and single, you are without obligations, nothing to lose, able to take more risks, being naive (which can be good and bad), and being agile both location wise and time wise.

Said that, if you do have a family, I think that has a set of it's own advantages such forcing you to manage time better, likely to go after ventures that are more likely to succeed, and having a family behind you for support.

With a family, freelancing and consulting is your friend. It allows you the flexibility in schedule to pursue ideas and to work with other individuals that are in the start-up arena. You meet a lot of young companies in that line of work and you see a variety of problems. If you find a group who has an idea that you like but they cant provide a paying gig yet, you can scale your freelancing to provide the necessities while allowing you the free time to commit to a project. I freelance and consult for 3-4 days of my week, take weeks off at a time and still do well over 150k a year this gives me time to peruse the back log of ideas that me and two of my close friends have. I have 4 kids, a wife and grandparents that I take care of and I can say without a doubt that I have never felt more secure in my life than when I started freelancing. Well technically that is not true, I had a moderately sizable exit from the sale of a travel company that it gave me a nest egg, but even if that was not there, I would feel more secure than someone else making decisions about my future.

Point being, get out of your day job and into freelancing first. Get to where you are working your 40hr week and another 40hr steady freelancing, this will allow you to build a nest egg while you are making the transition, then when you are getting 40hr a week freelancing and it is steady dump the day job, then start scaling your hours back freelancing until you meet an equilibrium of money to free-time to pursue projects.

Maybe it's because you're older and is able to manage your time more maturely.

Maybe having people that depends on you makes you more responsible.

I think it is a risk factor. I was almost not hired at a startup specifically because the owner was worried about the level of risk I was taking with wife/kids/house etc. That's a good boss to have, one looking out for me. Things turned out fine.

Personally, it does alter the level of risk I'm willing to take. Pre kids, I'd be willing to risk a lot more. Having kids makes me value my time which does force me to be focused. I'm willing to work long hours, but I split the time up. I work until 4-5 and spend time with the family. If there is work to be done, I'm back on after the kids are in bed. This could present a problem at some startups.

I'll point you to some articles written by people more experienced than I at this:

anti-family: - Jason Friedman http://www.humbledmba.com/the-drag-coefficient-scoring-syste...

Pro-family: - Vivek Wadhwa http://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=1431263 http://techcrunch.com/2009/09/07/when-it-comes-to-founding-s...

Hope you find these helpful. Good luck!