Solo founders: how do you stay emotionally efficient?

119 points by dangrover ↗ HN
There's a great online book called "The Hacker's Diet" (http://www.fourmilab.ch/hackdiet/www/hackdiet.html) which is a no-bullshit dieting/fitness book written by an engineer with the assumption that the reader is fairly smart and rational. He even has some nifty Excel charts. I lost 50 pounds with his approach. Self-help books are usually total drivel with no respect for the reader, so I wish there were tons more written like this one, but on other topics.

But I figure starting a discussion about a problem I have (and others here might) could be a good idea...

Anyway, as I've worked on my business in my spare hours, I've gradually refined my methods for planning projects and getting work done. I'm more productive than I was a year ago, but there's kind of a blind spot that maybe other folks here don't have.

I've noticed the biggest bottleneck stopping me from efficiently accomplishing the tasks I've set up for myself is just my mood. I'll have a clear definition of what needs to be done, full confidence in where I'm going with things, and I'll sit down and just think "aw, damn, I feel like shit." Then I'll generally waste time until it's 1am and I need to sleep. This happens 1-2 nights a week.

I'm looking for news.yc folks to try to get some rational insights on on the irrational problem of keeping your mood in check and focusing on what matters, when you're just one guy.

How do you guys deal with emotional problems?

How do you avoid ruminating on things in your day that have pissed you off? This is my biggest issue.

What kind of non-computer things can you readily do to get away from it? What kind of breaks do you take, and what do you do?

What time of day do you work on your own stuff? Do you ever forgo sleep to hack into the night if it's going well, or do you always get your eight hours? Which is better in the long run?

These might seem like goofy or stupid questions, but I think discussing them in a nifty forum like News.YC might yield some good insights.

My thinking is that while some emotional problems are complex and difficult, a good number of them can be solved simply. I've noticed, for instance, that about half of the time I feel like dying, the trifecta of a shower, a nap, and a bowl of chili reverses the feeling 100%.

I had a few thoughts and suggestions around things that have worked well for me, but this post is long enough, so I'll leave this open. Thanks!

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One last thought: Just about every night when I'm about to fall asleep, I'll notice the logical inconsistency of my own thoughts and think something to the effect of "Wait, what exactly do kangaroos have to do with zeppelin pilots anyway? Oh, awesome, I must be about to fall asleep. Freakin' finally. ZZZZZ..."

I'd love to be able to do this more when fully awake. Sometimes I can -- I'll realize the influence of my emotions on my thoughts when considering them. But not as often as I'd like.

I liken it to a kind of metacognitive exception-throwing. Have you guys found ways to put a few more asserts() in your thought process?

I have noticed this "inconsistency" before falling asleep too. Does anybody have any idea why it happens?
I have this happen very regularly.
My guess is that the brain is trying new combinations, so that if you hit a new idea during the day, it will get reinforced (you get "excited"). So the brain "shuffles" stuff during the night (dreams) and during the day selects. It is like evolutionary modification of behavior, in a way.

But to do it, you have to reinforce a little the nonsensical stuff for a while (and at speed). This semi-conscious state in which there are inconsistencies is "pre"-dream, in which almost everything is quite nonsensical, but it kind of "makes sense", so it gets reinforced a bit. The interesting thing is that this is done in parallel, so what you remember about a dream is like a small part of what your cortex was "thinking", a massive recombination of ideas.

Well, I could go on and on with my speculations... ;)

This is interesting speculation, but also curious is how it happens whenever I get drowsy, which includes the drowsiness following a heavy meal. So either the brain capitalizes on the signals of the body ready to go to sleep, then it immediately starts reorganizing memories, or the body tries to go to sleep once the brain starts to reorganize memories; or, since sleep is regulated in part by hormones, the hormone production precedes both the brain and body... haha, the more I think about it the less I think I know. If it is hormonal then, perhaps certain foods could induce the behavior more strongly than others?
what exactly do kangaroos have to do with zeppelin pilots anyway

Hilarious. The strange thing to me is, while you are in this state, the connection makes perfect sense. It's only when you snap out does it become inconsistent. Maybe it has to do with certain portions of the brain relaxing before others.

What you describe is more like my experience when half-awoken in the middle of the night. That's when I'll hold adamantly to some complete bit of nonsense ("Really, this does make sense!") while my wife smiles and nods and tries to get me to turn over and go back to sleep. I often remember the event afterward and can't think why I thought I was making sense.

In contrast, when I'm falling asleep (and I assumed this was more what the parent was talking about) I'll suddenly realize that there have been one or several strands of nonsense running in my head for what seems like some time. Sometimes the strands seemed like reasonable trains of thought until I attended to them, sometimes they're just imagined dialog of other people (experienced as mentally overheard instead of consciously imagined) or something else.

But to become aware of them (and to be aware of them as nonsense) in the falling asleep case isn't to snap out of the state. The state continues often until I'm asleep, and a kind of metacognition appears over it with the realization that my thoughts don't make any sense and drawing the conclusion that I'm in the process of falling asleep. Except the original state is probably better described as semi- or sub-cognition.

It's nice to know a couple other people have similar experiences.

I'm not aware of any connection in myself between throwing an exception when almost asleep and being mindful of my emotional state and its effects while awake. (Except perhaps the correlation that I'm more mindful generally now than a few years ago, and the going-to-sleep thing might be a last-couple-years phenomenon. I don't remember it for sure before then.)

I do find that using programming metaphors (e.g., throwing an exception) for my mental processes is almost always misleading.

I think this metacognition is starting to bleed over into my dreams:( or :)

Also, I don't think it is just nonsense. These strange thoughts seem to have two levels to them. The more syntactic level, i.e. being part of a video game and fighting giants doesn't make any sense. But, it is the intuitive meaning behind these images that does make sense.

So, my theory is that I'm not necessarily thinking nonsense, but thinking on a different level. A level switch causes that meta-cognition of "nonsense" to occur.

This is similar to reading good literature. Often, great books make use of complex imagery that doesn't make much literal sense. But, focussing on the intuitive impressions that the images bring seems to convey some kind of deeper meaning.

A couple of times while I was in that state, the "pre sleep state" I was convinced that I discovered a way to fly while flapping my arms, it felt so real and was 100% convinced it would work. I was so happy... the next day I couldn't remember the "arm flapping formula". yes, it felt that real at the time.
Reminds me of a zen method. As you're waiting to fall asleep you slowly count up. Each time you get to five, go back to one. If you're lucky you might remember catching yourself at 6 or 12 a couple times, but usually your just out!

(It takes a little practice.)

A little glossolalia will fork your language processing and symbolic thought, and help turn the volume down on the pesky internal monologue.

Listen to this episode of Radio Lab - http://www.wnyc.org/shows/radiolab/episodes/2007/05/25 - it talks how, in our dreams, we start to do free association of events that have occurred during the day to make sense of them. Pretty interesting stuff.
intelligence is famously hard to define but I think a big chunk of it is associating ideas. most people have set pathways, x associates with y and so on. the more intelligent cross-reference more things. while you are asleep your brain plays with associations.

I would bet that someone who didn't dream would do substantially worse on cognitive tests of all sorts.

The less sleep I have the more narrow minded I become.
I've had dreams where I was in my room and it was completely realistic, but for some minor detail, such as a digital clock reading " 4:63 am". Often, I will notice the impossibility, even "consciously" within the context of the dream, and then I wake up.
I find I work more consistently on a day if I have exercised on that day; a jog, or maybe a session of pilates or something. Often I will work quite well in the morning when I know I am going to go for a run at lunch time, so it seems to benefit me both before and after strangely enough.
As often as I can, I try to work on the thing that I'm most interested in doing at that very moment, even if it's not the most important. Experience has taught me that an hour on the wrong task is better than an hour wasted procrastinating the right one. Eventually my motivation will return to whatever it was that I should have been doing, and at least then there's not a pile of stuff that's accumulated.

As for frustration ... dancing. Seriously. I tend to go out dancing once a week and just shut off my brain, chat with my friends and forget about everything productive for a few hours. It just helps me reset.

> Eventually my motivation will return to whatever it was that I should have been doing

How do you do to keep a coherent direction, then? My problem is precisely this, and I am so driven by motivation that I end up doing a kind of Brownian motion, in retrospect... ;)

So, i'm by no means a master... but i have a few thoughts.

1. I've found recently that when i don't want to code, it's because i don't understand something. I've been picking up a pencil and paper and just working out things i'm nervous about a lot more often lately. it's been a nice productivity boost.

2. avoid crap that will piss you off to no good effect. I read reddit.politics from time to time and lose an hour just grumbling over some comment. huge waste of time.

3. i like running. i don't do it often enough... but a couple of miles will really turn down the volume on the rest of the world. very nearly a reset button for me.

4. by all means, stay up late and hack. However, for me, more than once a week is very detrimental. Sometimes, it's worth being a little slow the next day.

Running has always been a great reset for me. Emotional stress, job stress, and even in the worst of times I've managed to push a semi-psychotic break back by a couple weeks. Though running has never been a proactive solution for me, only after I've gotten to deep in the sledge do I lace up and kick it out.
#1 is key for me. Once I have the problem and course of action in mind, I can plug away easily. Otherwise I kind of flounder around, unless I purposefully focus on figuring out what I need to do next.

Also, I'd say 99% of advice is useless. People don't usually need to learn more effective ways of doing things. What they really lack is motivation and that's usually because they're trying to force themselves to do something they really think is pointless.

practicing a musical instrument also helps, similar to running...
You might consider getting a co-founder. It's likely your moods will be out of phase, so that when one is down the other can be the motivating force and vice versa.

Also accept the fact that doing a startup is an emotional roller coaster - one day you will believe you are about to take over the world, the next you will wonder why you are wasting your time. Just accept these short term variations and focus on building a great product :)

Writing is much like being a single founder. I find the single most important thing is to be aware of how motivated you are, and to adjust the work accordingly. If you try to work on hard stuff when you're low, you'll just procrastinate. But if you start working on easy stuff, getting something done will put you into a better mood, and you'll be able to move on to harder stuff.

Hemingway used to leave something easy unfinished in the evenings, so he had something to start with in the mornings. That works for me too, with both writing and hacking.

excellent point. I find that once I start working on a few easy tasks it actually improves my motivation.

Some example of easy tasks:

* document the code * add a couple more tests * write a quick shell script to automate some repetitive task

Yes, momentum is everything.
The Hemingway reference was a tasty infobyte, anyone else have a favorite 'inertia management tip'?
A trick I sometimes use is to leave something broken (or unfinished) when I quit working. It's easier to get back up to speed by picking up where I left off than by starting something new from zero.
The "Morning Pages" concept from "The Artist's Way at Work" http://www.amazon.com/dp/0688166350

Write three pages in longhand first thing in the morning every day. Can be stream of consciousness, a journal, a story, or even "I don't know what to write" over and over.

There are a number of good techniques in the book, but this is the best one to start with.

for me: start programing in the morning and don't check my email or any "leisure" websites (like hacker news) until after lunch. I've found that I only have about 5 hours of hard-core coding in me in a day, so I try to use that up in one block in the morning and work on non-coding B.S. afterwards...

I agree with pg: coding is like writing. I use the same strategies trying to stay productive as a coder that I did fighting writer's block while working as a technical writer...

managing a running server, on the other hand, is not like writing...

it's a %$#%ing nightmare ;-)

Being a single founder supporting a live website is not like writing. There's a lot more pressure once you launch.

This is a good way to stay productive--launch and you'll be forced to stay on your toes.

This is the single best advice in the thread. "Launch and you'll be forced to stay on your toes". This is what I did, and i'm finding it more and more difficult to procrastinate :-).
do something outside

step away from the keyboard

meet girls get laid

i agree. close the macbook.

meet girls.

don't forget to bring your iphone for your date though!
I enjoy watching a good movie to get me in the mood. Rocky or Rudy usually does the trick.
I rarely get pissed off at other people; for me that's usually a sign that I'm insecure about something and unwilling to admit it. But I do get tired and unmotivated now and then.

When I catch myself procrastinating, I just say "OK, I'm going to procrastinate for the next 30-60 minutes". Then I set the timer and goof off without guilt. When the timer rings, I go back to work.

Minimal exercise is really important: some stretches/calisthenics in the morning, occasionally pushups or pull-ups as 5-minute breaks.

My social life is limited, but I see my girlfriend every day and that helps a lot.

Exercise helps.

Music I like can also help me focus when I'm procrastinating too much.

There are times when I'm at an energy/focus low, and can't get anything done, which just lowers my energy/focus more, which can lead to a downward spiral. If I can push through it and get something done, that might pick me up, but more often it's a signal that I need to take a break and get off the computer (things like reddit or stumbleupon don't count as a break, they just turn my brain into mush).

having an online audience that gives feedback is motivating. even better if your friends (cheerleaders!) are your first users and constantly give you reallife feedback.

if you don't have cheerleaders, try to find some. even better, find projects you can cheerlead for too. starting stuff without an audience gets depressing real fast. if someone takes notice of what you're doing it's a lot harder to bury yourself if things get tough.

it's all about building structures that force you to succeed. put yourself on rails, and make sure it's really hard not to stay on course.

Fundamentally: be conscious of your mood and the things that affect it, and work with your mood rather than against it.

The suggestions here are good examples of this philosophy. I would add: don't try to change your mood by force of will alone.

I clean my desk and make it clutter free. I tend to accumulate everything from printouts to coffee cups over time.
take up some form of martial art as a hobby. i suggest this because it involves a lot of important aspects that you won't get as a full-time solo hacker: gets you physically fit, helps to relieve stress, gets you to clear your mind and focus on something different for a while, and puts you in a social environment away from a computer.
As many people have said, exercise is key. Besides just clearing my mind, I find that going for a run or a bike ride actually helps me focus on what I need to be working on when I get home.

My #2 problem after procrastination is prioritizing what I should be working on. Whenever I go for a bike ride for a few hours, I have a lot of time to think about the direction of my project, which really helps me focus and get right to work when I'm home.

Also, a girlfriend helps, or at least set aside time for dating. Balance is key, or you'll burn out quick.

I have worked on my startup for over a year. I hired someone in India as my developer as I did/do the web design and business stuff....

Through my experience and something I recommend all startuppers have is a thick skin and a crazy, insane drive! If little things piss you off now, how would you handle negative comments made about the work you have slaved over? The negative actually should be viewed as constructive criticism, though also learn to decipher the vicious with the constructive!

When I want to get away from my work I will go and hang out with friends.

If i had to pick one thing, I'd say to keep promises to yourself. Being aware of the fact that you might, say, procrastinate is huge. So, make a promise to yourself that you will follow your clear defn, etc and code for 10 minutes or whatever you can to get yourself going. Then, once you get going you're 90% of the way there. But again, keep those promises and you'll build momentum and self esteem which will drive you forward.
To state the obvious, the lack of motivation, feeling like shit and the ruminating you mention are common "symptoms" of depression or dysthymia or chronic sadness. Pessimism about one's future is another "symptom".

I struggled with chronic sadness most of my adult life, and tried many things to get rid of it. For example, I tried about 9 different prescription antidepressant drugs. The best cure for me is to have face-to-face interaction with someone early in the day. 2 hours of f2f interaction in day seems to energize me more than 1 hour, but 1 hour is enough to keep most of the sadness away. The energizing effect seems to manifest the day _after_ the "face time". This works very well for me: much better for example than any of the prescription drugs. I got this idea from http://www.aaronsw.com/weblog/facedepress.

(That page and the others I read about this "face cure" say that watching video of faces works just as well as f2f interaction: I have not tried that yet.)

By the way, this antidepressant effect of face-to-face interaction is one reason I want a cofounder or two.

Good luck, and feel free to contact me privately if you have a followup question.

I have two points to make here:

1. Your general mood - I don't think you can control it and so you might be better off going along with it rather than trying to fight it. I also work on my stuff part time, and many days I sit down with the intention of doing something and I realize that I just can't do a damned thing. Forcing yourself to do stuff at this point is likely to make you unhappy and produce no code, so it's kinda useless.

I don't know about you, but I don't know when exactly I am in the good/bad mood, so I sit down and try to get some work done. Some nights I end up working 6+hrs straight into the wee hours and other nights I close down the editor and play CS or watch TV.

2. When you're working on new stuff sometimes its hard to get started since there may be several ways to do it, and they all seem equally valid. Instead of trying to plan out too much, just start implementing one of them. Even if you chose wrongly (you can reverse it later), it'll both motivate you to work further and give you a much better idea of what it is that you actually want/need to do.

I tend to do a good amount this kind of programming and it works out well in the end (if I compare some of earlier check-ins for my current project with the latest ones, there'll be very very little in common)

As awesome as the Hacker's Diet is (I use EMA weight chart to keep track of my weight), I don't think you'll find something quite like that for emotions ;)

Regarding 2:

I struggle with this all the time - I always start working on something one way but as soon as I come to a realization that there may be a problem with the one, I switch to the other way. It leads to a lot of thrashing.

This is never a good approach, fully implement one way and make it easy to swap at a later point and document problems.

I would also ponder the possibility of dopamine/serotonin levels and the like. For some people, it makes a difference, whence it becomes less of something you try to deal with, but something you live with.
I'm most productive when I'm training for a marathon. Amazingly when you spend 2 hours running, you end up with more time in the day. I don't know how it works either, but it does.

Martial arts training is good, too. Classes are at a specific time (which can be good and bad) and it's much more social (which is almost entirely good).

Maybe you're running against the rotation of the Earth, thereby causing you to go back in time. It worked for Superman.
No, even if I was Super-fast it would do no good, as I run a Hamiltonian cycle.
To get myself into my code I usually have to remove all distractions, including the internet. Either unplug, block specific sites with your hosts file or use 8aweek.

When I have your problem I usually wish I were coding, but its easier (and seems quick) to check facebook, twitter etc.

Remove all of those distractions and a computer actually feels really productive.

Your not a machine. Hacking is hard, it taxes us like not many other jobs. I read here a long post about sleep problems, hackers get all excited whenever the sleep topic comes up (seems many suffer). The point is hacking too late into the night can upset my sleep, thus starting a vicious cycle. I'd suggest stepping back, don't push too hard, if your working during the day then maybe hack for yourself at the weekends of for only 1.30 a day.