Programming can be a tough job. People are attracted by the pay and the great working conditions but the career is not for everyone. True you're not in the middle of a construction site with the sun shining in the middle of the summer but the constant pressure to produce will eat you up. There's a point where you just burn out if you're not careful.
Yes, if you are getting sick because of work then yes it's the wrong job for you.
What do you do now? Look at what you like and find a job that has many of the characteristics you like. You won't find the perfect job at the start but you can slowly evaluate the new job and move towards what you like. Volunteer if you can. Find a career coach to help you.
The constant pressure to produce makes me feel like I'm a horse who has accidentally been hooked up to a milking machine, and they were actually looking for something with udders.
I hope you can find rest in writing about it, like you're doing on your blog. What's the problem exactly when you say you're just staring at the screen, impossible to write a single line of code? Impostor syndrome, fear of not getting it perfect, not enough energy to even start a project, inability to concentrate and fiddle-around all day, defaitist thoughts about the uselessness of it all, or is the job simply too easy and unmotivating for you? With your background, maybe you can turn it around and find satisfaction in devoting your time to help out those who are addicted to their smartphone use, as a mental advisor or as an innovative app writer/designer.
I'm deliberately leaving the explanation blank, because I've learned from experience that such explanations are often just something you make up after the fact.
What I can tell you is that I consistently reach a point where I simply can't find the will power to continue. I can only find the will to do something else, to go somewhere else. The underlying reason for a feeling is always difficult to pinpoint.
My feelings when I'm in the situation are a mix of stress, anger and hopelessness. I want anything but to perform the task that has been assigned to me. I want to get the hell out of there.
Whenever I attempt to address the problem with the people around me, their proposed solutions are always very plain: Take a walk. Take a vacation. Get some rest. Don't worry so much.
To some extent, taking a very long break does resolve it, but I can't take 3-6 months off from work every year. I have considered working half-time, but this leads me to ask why I want to work half-time in the first place? Why do I want to work less?
Possible answers:
1. I am doing something wrong.
2. I'm a fundamentally broken person who can never hold a job.
Option 2 isn't exactly what you call a constructive or positive attitude, so I'm betting on option 1.
TL;DR: Some kind of tension, stress or resistance builds up over time, I procrastinate more and more until nothing gets done, and then I have to shake things up somehow.
6 comments
[ 3.8 ms ] story [ 25.4 ms ] threadYes, if you are getting sick because of work then yes it's the wrong job for you.
What do you do now? Look at what you like and find a job that has many of the characteristics you like. You won't find the perfect job at the start but you can slowly evaluate the new job and move towards what you like. Volunteer if you can. Find a career coach to help you.
I'm deliberately leaving the explanation blank, because I've learned from experience that such explanations are often just something you make up after the fact.
What I can tell you is that I consistently reach a point where I simply can't find the will power to continue. I can only find the will to do something else, to go somewhere else. The underlying reason for a feeling is always difficult to pinpoint.
My feelings when I'm in the situation are a mix of stress, anger and hopelessness. I want anything but to perform the task that has been assigned to me. I want to get the hell out of there.
Whenever I attempt to address the problem with the people around me, their proposed solutions are always very plain: Take a walk. Take a vacation. Get some rest. Don't worry so much.
To some extent, taking a very long break does resolve it, but I can't take 3-6 months off from work every year. I have considered working half-time, but this leads me to ask why I want to work half-time in the first place? Why do I want to work less?
Possible answers:
1. I am doing something wrong.
2. I'm a fundamentally broken person who can never hold a job.
Option 2 isn't exactly what you call a constructive or positive attitude, so I'm betting on option 1.