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Ask HN: How do I backout of an accepted offer

5 points by uvw ↗ HN
I lost my job last month. After interviewing with multiple companies, I received three offers. Unfortunately, I accepted the first offer that came along as I was in full panic mode.

The most recent offer I received is very interesting to me and I would like to accept it. I am not sure how to go about backing out of the one that I accepted already. This is little bit harder because I know the dev who interviewed me and he was excited about me joining.

13 comments

[ 3.8 ms ] story [ 46.7 ms ] thread
brodouevencode
Did you sign any contract with the first company? If not there's nothing to do except apologize for having to rescind the offer and wish them the best.
bryanrasmussen
If you haven't signed anything you are under no obligation, if it was in the company's best interest not to refuse you after accepting you they would in a minute. say politely you've changed your mind, at the worst they will offer you some more money.
AnimalMuppet
As others have said, if you don't have a contract, you can legally walk away.

Legally.

But there might be another question. To what degree do you consider that you gave your word? And how much is your word worth to you? If you're a "my word is good" kind of person, then "legally" isn't the only consideration. You might see if you can get the company (or your friend) to release you from your acceptance, to whatever degree you feel is needed.

brudgers
It’s business. Someone’s word is a signature on a contract and the contract contains what a person has given their word to do. There can be outside personal relationships in business that bring other ethical considerations into play but the question does not implicate their existence. To put it another way this is at arm’s length and bounded in the formal relationship of job interviewing. There might be long term repercussions and regrets but there is no basis the candidate ought to feel guilt or moral obligation.
AnimalMuppet
Depends on your personal code of ethics. Some people care about keeping their word, to the point that it becomes part of their identity. For you to say that they "ought" not to care about that seems a bit presumptuous. You don't, fine. But you have as much grounds to tell others that they shouldn't care about such things as they have to tell you that you should.
[deleted]
(comment deleted)
mattm
In this environment there have been lots of reports of companies that have rescinded offers.
brudgers
Ethical obligations are between people. Companies are not people. While people in companies may have ethics, the company itself does not. Companies are not ethical agents. They can’t give their word. They can’t hold a person to their word because a person cannot give their word to a company.

I’m not the person questioning the OP’s ethical integrity. And now mine.

ProblemFactory
> I am not sure how to go about backing out of the one that I accepted already.

Almost the same way as you said in this post. Don't mention the panic, do mention that the other offer is personally very interesting to you.

Do this after you have accepted and confirmed the second offer. The earlier you do this the better.

There is of course value in keeping your word once you have accepted something - but for how long would you work at a less interesting position for just that? A few months, a year, 3-5 years? If under a few years, then you aren't actually helping them by accepting and "keeping your word".

jedberg
Honesty is the best policy here:

"When I was interviewing for the job with you, I was also interviewing with other companies. Your offer came in first and the job sounded interesting and the pay was good so I accepted. However, since then one of the other companies I interviewed with has given me an offer for a more interesting/better paying/shorter commute/etc. job and so I've decided to accept that offer. I hope this doesn't negatively impact you and that you can quickly find someone else."

Or something like that. Tells them the honest reason why, doesn't burn your bridge too badly.

Rebles
I wonder if you live in an at-will employment state (e.g. California), does it even matter if you signed something?
uvw
I do live in an at-will employment state.
janbernhart
Just be honest and respectful. Preferably over the phone/audio/video rather than an email. Also, be clear and to the point, so they know you're not just trying to get more money out of them.

(If it's just about the money and they offer, it's a different dilemma).