I recently turned 33. What's your best advice for a 33 yr old?

18 points by arey_abhishek ↗ HN
I loved responses to a twitter thread where a 22 yr old asked for advice and thought I'm better off asking for advice on HN.

28 comments

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Get fit or if you are... stay fit. You're not 22 any more.
Before physical activity, stretch out. After an injury, recover before you try to go full out. You're not 22 any more.
Can personally confirm. I had to stop lifting when I got a mild COVID case, and a couple weeks in I kept getting the random aches and pains everyone always complains about. At least for me, lifting weights makes them go away (at the cost of some DOMS for a few days, but once you're over that hump you're home free).
Hold on. That’s the 40-year old advice ! :)
34 reporting in, it's a 30s advice if you are a computer jockey sitting all day every day.
20 to 40 is about "how much can you get" (in terms of physical conditioning), 40 to 60 is about "how long can you keep it", and past 60 is about "how slowly can you lose it". Waiting until 40 to get in shape may be kind of late...
Im in mid 20s it also applies to us >.<
If you're parents are still around don't take them for granted. You are in a busy stage of life but your parents are nearing the age that health can fail.
You're 33. That means, unless you strike it rich, you've got 35 more years to work, plus or minus a few. Plan on migrating from what you do now up the food chain to harder things - things that pay better, and where you're harder to replace.

In the end, people matter more than technology. Get better at relating to people, communicating with them, being human with them. You need human connections. As the world becomes more and more impersonal in interactions, find ways to connect with people.

If you're not married, people your age often start feeling like they need to. Choose very carefully. The consequences of a bad choice are horrible; the consequences of a good one are spectacular.

If you have kids, or are about to, they're going to take a lot of your time, energy, and mental bandwidth. Don't give it grudgingly. Love them, don't just tolerate them. Be the parent you wish your parents had been.

This is great advice. My 30's have been a lot lonelier than my 20's were. Friends moved away or got too busy. It is difficult to make friends with 30+ folks, we are all so busy!
> My 30's have been a lot lonelier than my 20's were. Friends moved away or got too busy. It is difficult to make friends with 30+ folks, we are all so busy!

I know exactly the feeling.

Of course, I don't feel lonely as I am a loner character, but I wish I was 18 again, only for the ease of meeting new people.

Most friends from my past are either married with kids or in relationships.

I'm not into such thing and hopefully never will, but there are times where you just need one person to have a conversation.

It sucks to get older without realizing how fast time passes by.

Yep. I think I only have 3 friends that see more than once a year.
Just a side note, you may have to choose between the time commitment with your kids and moving up the corporate ladder. My career is completely stagnate and has no upward options now that I have kid.
OK, to clarify: Avoid climbing the corporate ladder in ways that take more than you are willing to give - in time, morals, or other ways.

I was more referring to making yourself a more valuable contributor. At 40, you want to be able to do things that you couldn't at 30.

My company pretty much measures your worth by your dedication, which they measure by your hours. I feel like many others are similar. I really don't see how one can climb the ladder without substantial time increases.

Company policy says you need to work 7.5 hours per day. I was told that if I wanted a promotion, that I had to stay late. So let me get this straight: I was told to work 8.5 hours per day (increase around 13%) to get a promotion with a raise of 7%, even though company policies and job postings state 7.5 hours of work is required. Why would I effectively take a rate cut for a position with higher stress and more responsibilities? I've even seen people who stay late reading non-work articles get promoted just because they look dedicated.

You're probably right that you can't advance... at that company. There are other companies that are less stupid. Sounds like the first step of career advancement is to find one, even if it's only a "lateral" move in strict dollar terms.
I am turning 31 this month and hace been doing more consulting, PO and system architect work in the last 3 years.

I feel as if you have to be very careful with your timing, as i sometimes feel as if i am lagging behind in tech skill now.

See a dentist regularly. Even if you're fit and wealthy, bad teeth will make you miserable.
Put all of your money into the stock market and never sell
Avoid getting crucified
This one is getting harder and harder every year. You cannot let go of a fart without offending twelve self-declared minority groups.
Or you could just keep your racist/sexist/homophobic thoughts to yourself and not worry about it. It’s not that hard.
LOL.

For those not in the know: People think that Jesus was 33 years old (or about that) when he was crucified.

Get married. 30s is about bettering yourself. 40s being cynical. 50s, realising life is about more than money.
save more money, work on your skill set, and mind your health a little better than you did in your 20s.

other than that, just do the things you want to do. yeah maybe some doors have closed on your athletic abilities but besides that there's no sense in doing Y thing you're not interested in just because you're X years old and other X year olds are doing Y thing.

33 is a great age to have a kid (if you want them, and if you're in a position to do so). I had to wait (long story) until 37 and there's part of me that regrets it a little bit. There's a real benefit that comes from upending your whole life (there are, of course, other ways to do this) and having your priorities radically realigned (obviously, though, not for everyone).

If you have money to put away, get a financial planner and start saving money. The end of your career is coming up sooner than you think.

Take care of your body. In my late 30s I started to notice little things with my joints, muscles, etc. that made me think "oh, I guess I'm getting old now".

More generally, if you're not on the path you want to be on, change it. Over the last few years I'd had a strange feeling come over me: "Whatever person I want to become, if I don't become them in the next few years then I never will." Which, if the thought hadn't arrived uninvited into my mind I don't know I would have ever agreed with. The simpler version is "When are you going to become the person you want to be?" (or, "get right with yourself"). I hope the answer isn't "in my 50s or 60s".

Read more books, spend less time on computers/internet/TV.