HN Explorer

Ask HN: What are some hobbies for a 72-year-old retiree? Maybe OSS?

31 points by thesecretsquad ↗ HN
My dad is retiring this year from his career of 48 years. For reference, he worked for the federal government and his job involved interpreting U.S. import tax laws and calculating the correct duties on imports. He loved working, especially for the social interaction with his coworkers, but also because he likes learning and solving complex and interesting problems.

He's 72 years old and has his wits. Unfortunately, he doesn't have any hobbies. I'm concerned he'll get bored/depressed/stressed after the initial novelty of being retired wears off. He'll now have an extra 40 hours a week to fill, nobody to talk to during the day (except my mom), and nothing to exercise his mind and keep him sharp as he gets older. Also, he was highly skilled at his job and his department depended on him to get their work done. I think he'll miss looking forward to waking up in the morning and working on something where he knows his work is needed and appreciated.

A lot of people have jobs that easily translate to a hobby, side business, or volunteer service, but the work he did isn't really hobby material. He's not interested in starting a business or working as a consultant either (Not even part time. I think he's done punching someone else's clock.)

In college he studied and excelled at math, science (physics, chemistry), and economics. He's always had an interest in computers, but never got involved in programming. One thing I thought of was open-source software development. I know if he was interested he'd be able to learn the language/tools easily, but I have no idea what projects to suggest to someone who is his age and completely new to software development.

Does anyone have any suggestions how a 72-year-old could get started with open-source software development? Does anyone think it would be a bad idea to get him involved in open-source software? Any other hobby suggestions?

54 comments

[ 3.3 ms ] story [ 59.4 ms ] thread
onion2k
Your post makes it sound like you're speculating about what he wants. You could just ask him instead. Maybe he's feeling the same way, or maybe he's been planning what he wants to do in retirement for years and and has it all mapped out.
thesecretsquad
I've had several conversations with him about what he plans to do with his time after he retires and he doesn't know. He's actually said to me, "I don't know. What do you think I should do?". My dad loved his job and never really wanted to retire.

I was trying to come up with some ideas that were more than just idle consumption, like reading books or watching tv/movies because I imagine that will get old quickly. I was trying to think of less passive activities. He used to be a big pool player when he was younger and he said he might try to find some people to play pool with at a local pool hall, but he's had 48 years to do that and I think I can count on one hand the number of times he's gone out to play pool; so I'm a little skeptical that he'll do that. He's quite introverted and doesn't really look to get out much. In fact, he currently plays virtual pool online. But he only does that for about an hour a day and I don't think he'll want to fill entire days doing that. That's why I was looking for something maybe he can get involved in that he could do from home and would be both creative and challenging, e.g. open-source. I also thought doing something totally new might be fun for him.

aqsis
Sound like software development might be a good opportunity for your dad to put his analytical skills to good use in his retirement. I'd suggest finding an existing open source project that relates to a field that he has particular interest in. That might be something related to his career or other interests throughout his life. Choosing a project that has an innate interest to him is more likely to be "sticky" and would make learning the new technologies and systems more achievable. By far the best place to start would be on Github of course, scan through the projects on there for something that jumps out and is looking for contribution.
chaganated
physical fitness, mind-body connection, the greeks knew what they were talking about

forget jogging though -- heart attack waiting to happen

jasonkester
Public Service Announcement: Don’t wait until you’re 72 to find a hobby.

Figure out some fun things you like to do when you’re young, and make the time to do them regularly. Get in the habit of doing weekend trips to go fishing or kite surfing or competitive bridge playing or whatever. Max out your vacation time doing so, and get a good set of friends in place who are just as passionate about bicycles or vintage trains or civil war re-enactment as you are. Spreading this work out over a lifetime will leave you in a much better place than trying to think up a hobby and find people to do it with in your 70’s. And you’ll be a lot more keen to retire as early as possible, knowing exactly how you’re going to fill all those new free hours.

A side effect of doing this is that you’ll live a lot more life while you’re young enough to enjoy it. And when you’re too old to spend the entire winter snowboarding anymore, you’ll still have a crew of friends to hang out with and talk about it.

[deleted]
(comment deleted)
bromuro
To me an hobby should be something I enjoy to do when I have nothing to do, so hopefully I will never have to look for one. Instead of splitting my life in what I enjoy and what not, my personal rule is to enjoy whatever I am doing.
jasonkester
Wouldn’t that leave you with a rather slim set of things to choose from to enjoy?

Most of the things I like doing would make miserable, low paying, jobs. And even though my job of programming computers is the most fun thing anybody could ever pay a guy 3X what he deserved to do it, there are a lot of other things I’d rather be doing much of the time.

So my personal plan is to minimize the time doing Work and maximize the time spent doing Play. Or, put another way, “I like climbing, surfing, and traveling. So I write software for a living.”

cweagans
IMO, having a hobby that's completely unrelated to your profession is critical, especially for people who do any kind of "knowledge work" for a living. Doing something entirely different gives your brain the time and space to process things. It's sort of like how people say they have their best ideas in the shower/when out for a walk/etc. It's not about splitting time between what you enjoy and what you don't - it's more that just doing one thing all the time isn't particularly healthy and can be an active hindrance to doing your best work.
thesecretsquad
This is good advice, of course. But my dad is very much an introvert, so he never really sought out things to do with others. He never really took up a hobby by himself either because like I said in my post, "he loved working". And I mean he loved it. He looked forward to it every day. He never imagined retiring. We asked him for years when he would retire and he would say he doesn't want to. So maybe it's unfortunate that he's in this situation, but not much can be done about that now except to figure how how to move forward.
Gustomaximus
I'd encourage a club. Personality and family life make this more or less relevant but most people need others to hang around. Also good for other household members who are used to alone alone.

In Australia we have clubs called 'mens shed' which is basically a community hall full of tools and retired blokes get together to chat and make stuff. That's always sounded good to me.

Search for local communities and clubs near you. And consider something he can do in another 10 years ongoing so they can keep at it with the same community.

Zanni
Olympic weightlifting. Seriously. Any physical exercise is going to be a great mood elevator, and weightlifting, due to its high skill requirements and relatively low volume, not as punishing on older athletes. Plus there's a lot of (socially distanced) camaraderie in the gym. As a novice, he could improve very quickly, but it's endlessly deep. And, bonus, the qualifying totals for competition are so low at his age that he could probably be competitive within a year. Saying this as a 57-year old who just got seriously into weightlifting.
superhuzza
Ideally something with a social component. I think a lot of people retire and realise almost all their social interactions were work related.

Chess is a great game, and there are often local clubs, can be played with family and friends etc. I don't think it's enough to really occupy him full time, but it helps take the edge off all that extra time.

taffronaut
My dad was in a similar situation when he retired from chemistry research. He tried a bunch of things, some of which stuck, some of which didn't but still passed the time and got him into outside interactions. In no particular order some of them were: tutoring maths to adults, tending a community garden vegetable plot, being the treasurer for the local naturalist society, research for a local history group, joining a walking club. IMHO your dad's new hobby should be to keep trying new stuff.
thesecretsquad
> *IMHO your dad's new hobby should be to keep trying new stuff*

That's a good idea. I'm going to suggest that. Thanks

fiftyacorn
What about mentoring? I was looking into a local charity near me to help befriend autistic adults. No much but meeting them for coffee or a walk.
[dead] redis_mlc
When I want to mentor autistic people, I just post on HN.
thiago_fm
Maybe give him company and go for camping, fishing or anything they like and give you sometime with them. Old people might say that they like working, but actually most of the times they are desperate for attention from their sons and grandsons.

He'd have more fun actually playing any kind of games. He has worked all his life, don't get me wrong, but why the hell would he now contribute to OSS?

tubularhells
A resounding yes. My father didn't care for me much in his younger days, and now he is miserable because I seemingly abandoned him and my mother, whereas they are just emotionally abusive and unwilling to change.

If you like your father, get into miniature painting and historical wargaming with him.

thesecretsquad
Sorry to hear you've had relationship troubles with your parents. I hope things get better.

I appreciate the suggestions. I'll add them to my list.

thesecretsquad
I would love to spend more time with him. Unfortunately, right now I live 1500 miles away. But I think you might be right about the OSS. A lot of other commenters seem to share the same sentiment and I'm thinking they might also be right.
a3n
I wonder if he could combine math, science, even economics with photography.
2rsf
He can help testing open source software, that requires less programming knowledge and more of being "street smart".

Personally I would recommend getting into scale modelling, either plastic or wood. Building a scale wooden ship is thrilling and fun and takes a few month to complete so it nicely fills up your time.

Syntonicles
Take him to a soaring glider club and get him a discovery flight. It's like sailing in the sky. It's non physical, usually full of older men who do more socializing than flying, and it offers both a sense of excitement and a new perspective on the world. It might be that after a life long sedentary career, floating above the earth in tranquility will be a nice change.

It's like $100, and even if he doesn't want to continue flying sail planes it might awaken an interest in aerodynamics, and lead to model airplanes or RC planes or kite gliding or quadcopters. The last one could even lead to coding, but doesn't have to.

thesecretsquad
Interesting suggestion, but I that would scare the crap out of him :)
tubularhells
Get him into historical wargaming and miniature gaming, my dude. There are ancients, napoleonics, 30y way, 7y war, WW1 ww2, modern, whatever the old man has interest in. It will keep him motivated until the grave.
keiferski
I’ve been trying to get my recently retired mother to read a large literature collection like The Harvard Classics or Great Books of the Western World. If you supplement them with specific omissions + research the best translation available, they are a great long-term project.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harvard_Classics

atmosx
Open source software is absolutely something worth pursuing. I would propose chess for the elderly[1]. Especially those with a history of dementia in the family. Joining a club adds the social aspect which I find extremely beneficial, meeting people of all ages, taking part in local competitions, etc.

[1]: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6617066/

abrookewood
Not programming, but what about Bridge? Every older person I know who plays it seems to get rather obsessed and it's very social.
thesecretsquad
I've heard of Bridge, but had no idea how it's played. I looked it up and it's totally not what I expected. Sounds interesting. Thanks for the suggestion.
lucas_membrane
The brain science people are finding that making music, i.e. singing or playing a musical instrument, is likely to be very good for maintaining brain health. Additionally, because it is a physical activity, it encourages old folks to keep their bodies functioning reasonably well so that they can enjoy their music hobby.

That brings us to exercise, which is a great thing if you can enjoy it. Easy exercise, e.g. walking, shuffleboard, kite flying, billiards, ping pong, swimming, gently aerobic exercise machines, dancing, shuffleboard, golf, dog walking, frisbee, gardening, or just sharing simple activities with active younger relatives, are fine, and as little as 45 minutes on most days may be optimal.

I'm retired a few years and just a bit younger than your father, and I would spend 40 hours a week on those two kinds of activities except that my wife often direct otherwise, which I also enjoy considerably. Life is very good for me now. I have gotten rid of a vast majority of my programming and software books and almost eliminated programming activities entirely. The problem with programming is that if you like it, you always have a program that needs one more tweak, and that means that every day you will sit down much more than you expected to. Better to keep an active mind in an active body.

thesecretsquad
Congrats on retiring. Thanks for the suggestions. I've added them to my list. Following your example, it sounds like maybe I should encourage my dad to seek those simpler hobbies instead of getting involved in programming, which can be quite arduous. You mentioned playing a musical instrument and I remembered my dad was a pretty good piano player years ago. He hasn't played in years, but he might be interested in picking it up again now that he has the time.
lucas_membrane
In late 2019, two years after I retired, I attended a presentation by a neuroscientist who brought his grand piano. The piano had a sign on it, something like "This machine stops dementia." Since then, music has been my daily avocation.
Dowwie
I volunteered disaster relief for the American Red Cross after Hurricane Katrina. A lot of volunteers were retirees from all walks of life. I was a software engineer working at a finance company. My peers were retired high school principal, retired president of a manufacturing company, guidance counselor, social worker, nurse, etc. I suspect that the ARC has been very busy in Texas lately and could probably use help, immediately. Your dad could receive training and be on a plane in less than a week. Aside from major crises responses, there are local chapters in every state, and your dad could get involved locally.

This type of volunteering is stressful but has extraordinary purpose. It remains one of my most meaningful life experiences.

thorin
Open canoeing, cold water swimming, hiking in the mountains, playing in a band? That's what I'm planning on doing.
nuriman
Amateur astronomy, specifically astrophotography. Tons of fun, takes patience and focus as well as tons of time outside, strong community and a sense of purpose, since you can actually realistically see stuff no-one ever saw before!
ManlyBread
Chess perhaps? Chess are easy to pick up, hard to master, can be played in person, online or against the computer, offering a never-ending stream of opponents to play against.