It doesn't always have to be amicable and friendly - sometimes you just have to find something new, quit, and move on. I would say in these cases, just try to control your reactions as much as you can in order not to make things worse while actively planning your exit. If you need to report anything bad, keep records of everything and follow the proper channels to do so.
True, and this has happened to me as well. I just started looking for a new job and quit once I had one lined up. Given the circumstances, it was as amicably as it could have been, but it definitely wasn't my best exit. I just tried my best to control my own reactions and not to do anything that would make things worse. Sometimes that's the best you can do.
This is true. I have often found that the people who are telling you "don't burn bridges" are the same people who have just poured a five gallon can of gasoline all over the bridge, and are now standing in the middle of the puddle holding a Zippo lighter...
'Never' burn bridges is too absolute a declaration to be possible in the real world.
Some employers aren't worth the effort or brain power to preserve a relationship with. Some are, and some are excellent employers you may not want to part with but are doing so for other reasons.
For myself, I spent about 2 years with a company and I was completely burned out by the end of my time there. 14 or 16 hour days at times, some weeks I put upwards of 2,000 miles on the work truck, no raise throughout my time there despite bringing in more work for the outfit.
To top it off, the owner had a habit of just telling someone not to bother coming in when they gave their 2-week notice, unless he really liked them. Sure enough, when I told them I was burned out and done with it rather than finishing out the two weeks, closing up the reports I was working on, documenting my workflow for someone else and so on, I was asked to turn in my vehicle and phone and get on with it.
All well and good in my opinion as I was completely done with those folks, and it only solidified my choice not to answer any calls from them in the future were I to get any. And there it is, a burnt bridge. Not particularly through my actions or the way I exited, but I'm not sad that its burnt, either.
That said I totally agree with the other point of the article, always turn in your best work. Networking, word of mouth, and relationships are worth far too much for future employment than to risk it on half assing some aspect of a job you don't really like.
Good point on the "Never" phrase. I updated the wording of the article to soften it a bit. I too have been in a situation where the best I could do was just get out as quickly as possible and try not to make things worse for myself, so I understand for sure.
Burning bridges is fine. Being scared of burning bridges reduces personal agency.
Burning the bridge doesn't mean relying on previous connections to get ahead, it supposed to be being focused on doing the task at hand with focus, with the mindset there is no going back
"Being scared of burning bridges reduces personal agency."
Totally agree. "Don't burn bridges" is also such common, banal advice that it's strange the OP is writing it as if it's a contrarian opinion.
For every story like the OPs there are probably hundreds or thousands of people who tacitly perpetuated bad work conditions instead of "burning bridges".
Who said I wrote this as if it's a contrarian opinion? It's just good advice.
I don't know why everyone here seems to be focusing on the negative side of this and responding to this as if those with terrible bosses and bad working conditions should just always put up with it and do whatever it takes to keep the boss happy. That wasn't the point of this post at all.
Maybe this phrase doesn't work will in all geographies, but the specific term "burning a bridge" in this context means "leaving on a bad note". Things like yelling, loosing control, flipping off the boss, etc. Things that are undignifying and might spoil an otherwise good reputation or future recommendation.
I recognize that sometimes this is within your control, and sometimes it's not.
> Even if the work itself doesn’t ultimately matter, people around you will notice and remember
This is counter to my personal experience, as well as that of Maya Angelou: "At the end of the day people won't remember what you said or did, they will remember how you made them feel." It's supposed to be an inspirational quote, but I find it simultaneously accurate, depressing as hell and subversively instructive: do the best you can of course, but far more important than your work is how "nicely" you do it.
I think this is encapsulated in the point I am making with that sentence. It may not be the work itself that people will remember, but it's how you do it.
If you are consistently someone who can be relied upon to get things done and consistently does them well, people will remember that.
Well, I wish I could say that this matched my own observations, but it seems like somebody who's incompetent but nice will be better remembered than somebody who's effective but brusque.
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[ 2.6 ms ] story [ 52.8 ms ] threadSome employers aren't worth the effort or brain power to preserve a relationship with. Some are, and some are excellent employers you may not want to part with but are doing so for other reasons.
For myself, I spent about 2 years with a company and I was completely burned out by the end of my time there. 14 or 16 hour days at times, some weeks I put upwards of 2,000 miles on the work truck, no raise throughout my time there despite bringing in more work for the outfit.
To top it off, the owner had a habit of just telling someone not to bother coming in when they gave their 2-week notice, unless he really liked them. Sure enough, when I told them I was burned out and done with it rather than finishing out the two weeks, closing up the reports I was working on, documenting my workflow for someone else and so on, I was asked to turn in my vehicle and phone and get on with it.
All well and good in my opinion as I was completely done with those folks, and it only solidified my choice not to answer any calls from them in the future were I to get any. And there it is, a burnt bridge. Not particularly through my actions or the way I exited, but I'm not sad that its burnt, either.
That said I totally agree with the other point of the article, always turn in your best work. Networking, word of mouth, and relationships are worth far too much for future employment than to risk it on half assing some aspect of a job you don't really like.
Burning the bridge doesn't mean relying on previous connections to get ahead, it supposed to be being focused on doing the task at hand with focus, with the mindset there is no going back
Totally agree. "Don't burn bridges" is also such common, banal advice that it's strange the OP is writing it as if it's a contrarian opinion.
For every story like the OPs there are probably hundreds or thousands of people who tacitly perpetuated bad work conditions instead of "burning bridges".
I don't know why everyone here seems to be focusing on the negative side of this and responding to this as if those with terrible bosses and bad working conditions should just always put up with it and do whatever it takes to keep the boss happy. That wasn't the point of this post at all.
I recognize that sometimes this is within your control, and sometimes it's not.
This is counter to my personal experience, as well as that of Maya Angelou: "At the end of the day people won't remember what you said or did, they will remember how you made them feel." It's supposed to be an inspirational quote, but I find it simultaneously accurate, depressing as hell and subversively instructive: do the best you can of course, but far more important than your work is how "nicely" you do it.
If you are consistently someone who can be relied upon to get things done and consistently does them well, people will remember that.