HN Help: Mom wants to censor my blog posts; what should I do?
I am faced with an ultimatum;
1)Remove certain paragraphs of my previous blog posts and run all new posts by my mom before posting, or
2)Loose all of my freedoms I have earned during my childhood (Including confiscation of my house key, grounding, internet access and access to mobile devices, among other things)
What should I do? Should I refuse to censor my posts on principal, or should I give in and agree?
6 comments
[ 0.25 ms ] story [ 24.7 ms ] threadBefore that though, do whatever you can to talk her out of it. Debate about it. Try to compromise. Best of luck!
In that case, there's not much you can do since she's technically the owner of the place and should rightly be able to dictate the terms of usage of her house for whatever reason (whether or not they make sense).
Once you are able to afford your own place / internet connection, you're pretty much free to do whatever the hell you want.
So yeah if you were me, which probably isn't the best decision, I would tell her if she wants to do all this crap then that's entirely her decision, and I'm sorry I have somewhat differing opinions than her on some issues, but you know what? welcome to the real world.
It really isn't very hard to get internet access outside the house nowadays, plenty of cafes around and you can get a cheap netbook on craigslist for like $200.
Seriously if she keeps doing crap like this it's only going to ruin your relationship and then when you're old enough you'll be gone and never talk to her again. You think that's what she wants after raising you all this time? Some people are just stupid.
But yeah- even barring the issue of the blog, I would despise myself if I ever let my parents just say crap like, "ok well... if you don't do what we say we're just going to take everything away because we can." I'm my own person and I wouldn't let people just control me like that. Again I would just tell her she can do whatever she wants to make herself feel all warm and snuggly at the end of the day but I'm not just going to blindly follow crap you say because you think you own me. If _you_ want to make the choice to start going down this road and deteriorating our relationship over something ridiculous, than that's entirely your decision. There are some things that you just need to learn to accept.
You don't say why she wants you to change the posts, but she obviously doesn't agree with what you're posting.
Perhaps you've given away more information about yourself or your family than she is happy with being available to the internet at large, which is perfectly reasonable.
If she is unhappy with the language you are using, such as swearing or vulgar slang, then maybe you can reach a compromise to rewrite the paragraphs with cleaner text. There are no good points that can't be made without vulgarity.
If it's that she doesn't agree with your opinions then you're probably going to have to sit on them. I'm guessing you're still early to mid teens and unfortunately, for a while yet, your parents are still responsible for you, and your actions and opinions still reflect upon them and how the rest of your family and their friends see them. Even if you don't agree with them, until you're responsible for yourself (i.e. paying the bills) it's a harsh truth that you might have to bite your lip to maintain family harmony.
In conclusion you most likely have to play by her rules, and the only option is to try to calmly reason your case with her and hope to find a happy compromise.
If you really feel like what you have to blog about HAS to be said, then you'll have to sneak out and use an internet cafe or other public connection, but you'd better be certain you've got unshakeable right on your side because sneaking and lying invariably gets found out and there's always a price.