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I did not care much for the style that felt forced at times, but that was inspiring. Now I absolutely have to try a bagel garlic bread.
Well the hole in the middle makes bagels particularly not suited for vertical slicing.

Then the whole “I am just not going to slice it but rather make vertical cuts and fill every single cut with cream and meat” turns it into a gigantic calorie bomb. Regular bagels are already pretty heavy, but this takes it to a new level.

That reminds me of the “shameless bakery” in Brooklyn, which served icecream sandwiches containing not one but three scoops of ice-cream, held together by two enormous cookies. Or Carnegie deli pastrami “towers”.

This is gross.

Then there’s the Arizona outback gas station ice cream sandwich: a half-inch thick slice off a half-gallon block of ice cream between two pop tarts.
I think I might just need to move to Arizona
You could totally make one of these without moving to Arizona or even visiting.

Here’s the recipe:

  [ your favorite pop tart ]
  [                        ]
  [ the slice of ice cream ]
  [                        ]
  [ and the other pop tart ]
But imagine what other delights await me in the Grand Canyon State? Who else serves ice cream by the slice?
That was more interesting than I expected it to be! Well done random article.
Ugh.

Look. If you're going to make a bagel sandwich, there's only one cutting method. Horizontal long cut, fill with mayo, ham, bacon, cheese, egg, butter, and then slice once vertically in the middle. This gives the ideal two-part breakfast sandwich and allows the cheese to melt down the vertical part. If there's too much surface area you get too much other ingredients and the balance is thrown off. Plus you have to be able to eat this monstrosity one-handed while running for the bus.

Pictures look great and tasty. Although I think most of the dishes will drive your cholesterol levels to new heights!
What’s cholesterol? I have never heard of it… clearly you have just made the word up… going to ignore…
I'm not sure about vertical slicing - but I've recently started doing a double horizontal cut in my thicker bagels - creating 3 slices for toast or a club sandwich.
Can we dispel the notion this is a St. Louis thing? St. Louis has a lot of regional foods- this isn’t one of them.
Yeah, I spent the first 24 years of my life in St. Louis and have no memory of ever encountering this, although I was kind of a shut-in so maybe I was just out of touch.
It's a St. Louis Bread Company/Panera thing, not a St. Louis thing.
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Beigels in the UK are generally a much simpler, more traditional creature than in North America, where they seem to tend to become, from a British beigel-lover's perspective, something quite monstrous. A great beigel is like a great croissant - perfect in its simplicity. A beigel should have a crisp, golden crust, and sufficient chew to leaves your jaws feeling exhausted. The filling should highlight these these attributes and not dominate them. Beyond that its just not a beigel.

Tip: Best beigel in London are to be found - no not in Beigel Bake! - in Sharon's Bakery (Edgware and maybe elsewhere) or Carmelli's (Golder's Green).

It's bagel, not beigel. And a bagel is a bagel, I'm reasonably certain that British bagels are identical to American bagels.
> a bagel is a bagel

You trying to start a war between Montreal and New York?

> It's bagel, not beigel

I think you'll find that it's often spelled beigel on the other side of the ocean, as per example of the UK's most famous Jewish bakery [1]. The cockney Yiddish community in London's East End who introduced beigel's pronounced them with a strong I (pasekh tzvey yudn) rather than an EY (tzvey yudn), and so the word was transliterated as bEIgel as per a German orthography (as in Eisenhower).

[1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beigel_Bake

> I'm reasonably certain that British bagels are identical to American bagels.

Even despite everything I just said about simplicity, British beigels lack the malt commonly used in American 'bagels', and the honey used in Montreal ones. So no, they are categorically not identical to American 'bagels'.

So now you know.