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"Crypto, after all, is the blanket term for all digital, blockchain-based assets. That includes everything from Ethereum, the popular blockchain used for decentralized apps and NFTs, to shitcoins, parlance for all non-Bitcoin tokens."

How old are these people at the verge? "Crypto" has always stood for cryptography (at least in the tech world, the word itself means "Secret/Hidden") and crypto coins are called this because cryptography is used. Thanks to garbage reporting like this we are redefining terms in the public and as it looks like now "crypto" will for ever be redefined to mean crypto currency...

A similar thing happened to the word "decimate". The original definition was: "from Latin decimat- ‘taken as a tenth’, from the verb decimare, from decimus ‘tenth’. In Middle English the term decimation denoted the levying of a tithe, and later the tax imposed by Cromwell on the Royalists (1655). To kill one in every ten of (a group of people, originally a mutinous Roman legion) as a punishment for the whole group." Now it means to totally destroying something.

2017 called, they want their pointless debate back.

This battle was lost half a decade ago, today it’s just an incredibly silly hill to die on.

I'm glad the word decimate is actually useful now, rather than referring to obscure taxes and military punishments.
The reporting is just following popular usage. Arguing against popular usage is like arguing against the tide. You can like it, or you can dislike it, but it’s happening.
I would argue that a news article has a duty to state when they’re using colloquial definitions. News articles has no business being “Technically Correct”.
“I know I’m fucked because they paid me in crypto, and I don’t even know how to cash out.”

How does this guy even tie his shoes in the morning? Try walking up to literally anyone attending these “banging” crypto parties that you’re going to, and ask if they want to give you cash for your crypto. I can’t think of an easier environment in which you can quickly convert your crypto to fiat.

Don't take a comedian literally.