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Ask HN: How do you monitor your young kids' computer usage?

16 points by KennyFromIT ↗ HN
As parents we can't be there at all hours of every day. Meanwhile, kids are being introduced to computers earlier and earlier. At some point, they will obtain a computer - maybe you feel it's the right time, or perhaps the grandparents give one as a present unannounced. Once you finally give in and allow them regularly access a computer of their own, how do you - a technical expert - monitor or manage their usage to make sure they don't get accidentally introduced to the darkest parts of the internet (e.g., bad images/videos, conversations with strangers, etc.)?

10 comments

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tims33
I use Eero Secure on my home network with handful of custom policies (i.e. oldest kid can use discord, youngest cannot) plus Apple's Screen Time for their devices when they're off the home network. It generally works, but also the internet is a deep cesspool and they still find some bad stuff. YouTube is the worst. There is no porn, but loads of other weird and questionable content.

Now that my oldest is 13, I've started to realize that you can only control a portion of this, so sometimes education is better. My setup above works fine for helping my younger two avoid content they might accidentally find. However, every middle school kid can help you kid find a variety of VPN solutions to evade all of this. The latest for my 13 year old was aChrome plug-in that routes that tabs traffic alone over VPN. I unblocked Discord for him in exchange for dumping the VPNs and having a deep conversation over what is appropriate and how to behave on the internet.

micahdeath
I use this at the house: https://firewalla.com/ (Red Model - limits to 100Mb) - Can block tiktok, youtube and more. (I keep the youtube block and pause the rule when I allow it.)

When away from home we just keep an eye on them. At friends' houses, we don't allow them to take their devices -- normally. We haven't reached 'the talk' stage yet.

idontwantthis
Ban devices from their room. Apple devices have really good parental controls.
tintedfireglass
Honestly I feel that kids will learn on their own and we should allow them to explore, unless you mean kids below 10 and in that case just block the internet and let them use computers offline

Edit: when I say learn on their own I mean we have to teach them to use the internet responsibly and instead of sneaking on web traffic or blocking particular sites we need to educate them about it. Communication is always the best solution to most problems

iqkznnft
I'm more concerned about their interaction with addictive apps than with strangers on the Internet. I'm confident that I can educate them to have a skeptical view of the world them and exercise common sense, I'm not sure I can stop them get more and more addicted once they get started down that path.
neilobremski
We tell our daughter what the acceptable limits are. Sometimes she pushes or breaks those limits. We talk to her about it, take away privileges for a bit, and then resume. She is 8 and addicted to her Kindle 3 but so far so good.
b20000
talk to them and warn them. you can’t micromanage.
schwartzworld
We haven't given our kids a computer yet, but when we do, it's going to be a command line interface for this reason.
42e6e8c8-f7b8-4
My kids don't get the password/pin to any machine that has internet access. When we log them in, they must be within view of others at all times. They don't use computers recreationaly most days a week.

Kids don't need computers. The internet is a cesspool filled with dysentary. They'll have to learn to navigate the cesspool someday, just like they need to learn to avoid heroin, but you don't need to teach your 4 year old not to seek out good fruit of the opium poppy. Some lessons can and should be delayed.

shortlived
My kids are 10 and 12.

- they don't have passwords to any devices. - Eero restrictions and filters on the wifi. I use to block wifi all together or to block youtube if they are supposed to be doing homework. - screen time restrictions on ios devices (controls apps not just "time"). This allows me to turn older phones into music player and/or educational apps only by removing browser and basically all apps. - they must be in an area where we can seem them and cannot have devices in their rooms.