It led to me staying faaaaar too long in an unhealthy relationship, trying to cure problems that I imagined myself responsible for causing. Sometimes you need to forgive yourself and move on. The Pottery Barn Rule and the Boy Scout Rule apply to things, not people.
I once took a golf lesson when I was a kid and, in learning about the divot removal tool, was told a similar one about the way to operate on a golf course:
"Leave it better than you found it."
I couldn't care less about golf, but this one stuck with me because it speaks to environmental stewardship. It's like a constructive riff on the mantra for when you're out in Nature: "Don't leave a trace."
Yup, great advice for a lot of contexts but not for relationships. This has been a hard lesson to learn and I've wasted 5 years of my life because of this.
Don't let others who talk rubbish about you affect your life. Not everyone will like you and that's fine. They are not even "extras" in the movie that is your life.
"Don't waste your time on beaming people up or down. Instead, consider gravity waves as advanced physics of the universe that could be used to travel interstellar distances."
It seems there is a plenty of motivation material like this, but nothing sticked with me. Isn’t that a book that saturates you with willpower and then it fades away in a week? What’s different with it?
I’ve watched another SEAL(?), Jocko Willink. He really charges you with “get up regardless, just do it”. And you get up and effing do it, but the next day comes and the game is over.
It also changed my life, not because of all the motivational stuff, but just because of the advice to do stretching exercise. I think it's been over one year now since I started doing some stretching every morning and it drastically reduced the injuries and discomfort I have after physical activities.
I created a random one. I play table tennis so the focus is also on the joints/muscles used there.
I start with head rotations, than some arm rotations and stretching, then torso rotations, then stretching the legs by doing lunges (I think they're called), then doing 2 sets of 25 squats with a very wide stance and also stretch my wrist for the last 5 squats of each set, then 10 squats with legs together, then stretching the legs and back by bending forward and reaching for my toes when standing, then some balance, standing on one leg and lifting the other backwards in the air and arms wide apart (this doesn't do anything, but I like improving balance in that stance).
Overall it takes like 3-5 minutes, sometimes after I do some crunches for some core strength and to get the heart pumping.
The squats are the hardest part, and require most motivation, but doing squats in the morning is really good for blood flow (to the brain especially).
I always do the stretches as soon as I wake up, after going to the bathroom but usually before washing my teeth.
Most people will use time to save money. However, your time on earth is limited unless the Silicon Valley weirdos happen to be right.
Money is infinite in that you can earn more or get a second job or get a better paying job or whatever. (Obviously only to a point but stay with me).
Also: your time does have value or it should since it is limited.
What would you pay for an hour of your life "back"? Or an hour to do whatever you wanted?
The truly smart play is trading money for time.
I've been a freelancer for a while but there was a point when I got laid off from my full time job so I ramped up to make ends meet. And I was fortunate enough that I was basically able to work for myself full time...
But when you are doing that, especially in the early stage...like I know that if I burn a couple hours at my billing rate of $50 an hour trying to save a few dollarydoos on a TV by standing in line for a big sale, am I really saving that much money when I effectively paid $100 to stand in line for two hours, something I don't like doing anyway, instead of just paying a bit more and getting a TV right away and not having to do that?
Another example. Changing the oil on my car. Could I? I'm pretty sure I could. I know the process. I'd probably want to watch some YouTube videos and there's tools I'd need to pick up, but I could be a real manly man and change my own oil and not get screwed by the shop.
But...
Let's say it costs me $40 at Autozone for oil and filter.
Let's say it costs $80 at the shop. A real shop not a jiffy lube. PFFT THOSE GUYS ARE SCREWING YA JUST DO IT YOURSELF.
I'd save $40 doing it DIY.
Most people would be on their way to Autozone...but on the other hand, I am not a mechanic that does 20 of these a day. Between watching videos and trying to figure out where everything is and inevitably covering myself in oil and whatnot.
Let's say it takes me 2 hours and the shop 1 hour. Doesn't matter, I saved 40 bucks! Whadda ripoff!
Would you pay 40 bucks for an hour of your life back? Maybe you like tinkering on cars and thats legit. Satisfaction is another benefit.
But for me, I am effectively paying some other person $40 to get dirty and bang his knuckles and whatnot while I sit in the AC and watch cable and dick around on my phone (which I enjoy much more) AND a lot of places will check and top up your other fluids and top off your tires and do an inspection to see if anything else will need work, which I don't know how to do and obviously they know what they are looking for.
AND because the guy knows what he's doing, it's done faster.
So effectively, yes, I will absolutely pay 40 bucks to hang out and watch basic cable in the air conditioning and make sure my car is good to go and all my fluids are topped off and also I get a whole hour of my life for doing whatever I want.
I agrée and it’s a bit of a maxim of mine, but the extreme of this is absurd. There’s lots of life that is worth doing for the pleasure of just doing. Sometimes that might be learning how to do an oil change (to follow the thread!) but sometimes that’s the exact absurd trade off you’re talking about
I think that's his point. The point in life isn't to have money, it's to spend time on things you liked. Thus, trading time to save money is a bad trade, but trading money for time that you enjoy is what you should do. Which in his case means spending time on your phone instead of changing oil, but it might look different for you.
And my point is if you pursue that thread too aggressively, without knowing what you want to do - and I’ve seen quite a few friends do this especially after moving to the valley and getting into ‘always be optimising’ mode - they don’t actually take the time to make mistakes
While I broadly agree with this, you have to be careful you don't slide too far into this mindset. Vacations become hard to justify if you view them as both the price of the vacation+lost income opportunity. It's easy to find yourself in a place where it's hard to justify doing anything but working.
Well I looked at it like this. A good two week vacation in Paris costs at least $10,000. I could instead bill out approximately $12,000 during that time. Therefore, the best thing to do is for me to pay a Parisian $2,000 to have my vacation for me. I stayed at home, and earned a lot more money. I can then spend that on another vacation. You can thank me later for this gem.
Even better - you can hire a Parisian and a Roman and a Londoner to each have a vacation for you at the same time! 2 weeks of work and 6 weeks of vacation in just two weeks of clock time. This is the way.
View flipped after that. Do your chores yourself as much as your time allows instead of jumping to pay someone to do it. There are other benefits not discussed here beside the time cost factor.
Agree. It's not just the medium sized things either. It works for the little stuff too.
Give yourself the permission to burn say $25/week on lifestyle. It means you can splash out for the more expensive parking, snack or item without feeling like you have to shop around to go somewhere so you aren't "overcharged".
An example might be if you want a can of coke but the vendor in front of you is charging $2 whereas you know the convenience store 3 minutes walk away would have it for $1. Just buy the thing.
I went back to changing my own oil when I realized it took a lot more time to go there and wait for them to change it vs doing it myself in less time than it would take to drive to the oil change place. And I know I it is done right.
Same with more important stuff like brakes. It does take some knowledge but I’m more motivated to get it right than any given pro.
> Would you pay 40 bucks for an hour of your life back? Maybe you like tinkering on cars and thats legit. Satisfaction is another benefit.
You're missing your opportunity cost. Would you be doing utility during that hour to make 40 bucks? If not then to maximize your profit to time then you want to do it yourself.
> But for me, I am effectively paying some other person $40 to get dirty and bang his knuckles and whatnot while I sit in the AC and watch cable and dick around on my phone (which I enjoy much more) AND a lot of places will check and top up your other fluids and top off your tires and do an inspection to see if anything else will need work, which I don't know how to do and obviously they know what they are looking for.
While I understand the point you're trying to make for people wandering by:
I've done my own oil, brakes, etc for as long as I remember. As long as you're not working on a supercar an oil change should take you less than an hour. Ideally inside of 30 minutes. 99.9% of vehicles are simple: place oil bucket under car, open oil cap on engine, gently loosen the oil pan bolt, drain oil. While the oil is draining you can get a second bucket and undo the filter. Reverse the process being careful to not strip the oil pan bolt, fill it up with the manufacturer recommended amount, and you're done. At least in America most AutoZones, Pep Boys, O'Reilly's, etc will take your used oil off your hands for free. As for tire inspection, fill up, etc you should also be doing this yourself. It's another 10 minute job with a $5 tool. I'm of the opinion every home should own an air compressor. It is one of the most universally useful things a person can have.
Why is this important? Oil shops are rife with fraud. The quality of your oil can dramatically influence the life of your car. I've had quick lube places rip me off so many times, leave parts off, etc. For what? I saved 30 minutes but gained another expense. Most of the time unless the shop is very reputable "premium" oils aren't actually royal purple. It's just the same crap they put in everyone else's car. By not paying dealer/etc premiums I save hundreds of dollars and get far better quality oil and service doing it myself. This is a skill I picked up being extremely broke before I got into tech and I've dedicated a small portion of my life to being able to fix (most of) my own issues. To the point I only show up to a shop when I need work that requires an engine crane or transmission lift (I've done transmission work myself before but its worth it to make it someone else's problem).
Do your own oil. You do it once or twice a year, you understand your vehicle better, and you get better oil and filters for the money. Moreover, the average tech connects an ODB-2 alarm checker to your car and then writes you an invoice. Cars are not difficult. If spending 2-3 hours a year is too time-expensive for you I'm not sure what to tell you. I just hope you don't run into a situation far from home where a tow truck is 6 hours away and understanding your car could get you home safe and fast.
I always have to Google which of my bike pedals is reverse threaded. It's a bit embarrassing, as I always think I should be able to figure it out from the whole angular momentum - torque thing.
With the crank in the position closest to the front tyre (horizontal and forward), put your allen key in the socket while aimed at 12 o'clock (ie, upward) and rotate toward the rear of the bike.
The rule is basically: rotate against the direction of the crank's rotation to undo.
Doing good enough is generally good enough. I always used this maxim in education to get just enough marks to pass with a high enough grade to study ratio. Today's perfectionists are tomorrow's procrastinators.
It's easier to build muscle mass before the age of 30 and the muscle you gain during that time will never go away (with a minimum of training).
The earlier you start exercising, the less difficult it will be to maintain your body as you get older. Someone who has never exercised but wants to lose weight by their 40s will have a much harder time than someone who started exercising early.
More than that, working out has a significant impact on my productivity, mood and psychological health. It changed my life.
This sounds like a universally good advice. Sometimes, it's really hard to put projects and work aside and devote time to excercise and health. It's not that amusing when you do it alone and really hard to make it a habit in the beginning.
I started with 100 situps and push-ups over an hour while watching tv and cutting dessert. One month later I looked in the mirror and was inspired to do more. Little things add up. Try something small, daily for 2 weeks.
100 situps is a lot for a beginner. Actually, after 3 years in gym I did ~80 in 4 sets. Not because I can't do more but 1) it is a high stress for a spine and 2) there are other exercises to do.
Sit ups can be really hard on the spine, even if done "properly". You slip a disc in your neck even slightly while working on your abs, and you won't be working on your abs or anything else for a long time. Slipped discs can cause an astonishing amount of pain.
Not an exercise guru, just someone who slipped a disc.
Yes! I figured this out in my mid-20's and it wasn't too late. I had gone to the doctor with the complaint that I just did not want to eat. He prescribed some substance, which of course didn't work. I was working from home, and my girlfriend had a back injury and a car so I had essentially no exercise.
I prescribed myself a bicycle, biked hard while singing every night until I couldn't breathe, and very soon I was regularly hungry and fit.
What did I need to learn? I'm not just a brain on a stick.
This needs to include not getting injured as well. I worked out plenty in my 20s, but was also reckless as hell, and lost most of my 30s to severe spinal degeneration. It's not too late in your 40s, though. It took about six years, but even after spending most of a decade unable to consistently put my own shoes on and ending up with ten screws in my spine, I'm still lifting just about everyday and putting up lifetime PRs. To be clear, I'm not saying those are huge numbers, since I was more of an endurance athlete in my 20s and only lifted to have a solid strength base for longer-duration activity, but even so.
Granting here, I'm sure it's definitely easier to resume old habits after injury recovery than to start completely fresh, so yeah, still start young if you're young. But if you're not, it's never too late until you're in the ground.
The point is more that it doesn't matter in the way the person wanting to be remembered would want it to be, or in the way the person wanting to be forgotten fears it to be.
If you’re Newton, Einstein, Gates, Elon or some other important figure, then I agree with you. But for the vast majority of all the rest of normal people (~99%), no one is going to remember us, no one is going to remember what we said or did and for sure our actions are going to have almost zero impact on the course of this timeline.
It’s true that some individuals will play a very important role in the continuation of our civilization, but these are just a few compared to the billions of humans.
An interesting question. A bunch of seemingly important advices on my mind right now, but none of them actually changed my life. This is probably one the of things that you never notice because most of them are in the form of “never”. Did “never stick a fork into a socket” change my life? Probably so.
One that I could call ~practical is “there is no eternal friendship, only common interests”. And a related one is “never do business with friends and relatives”. I’ve seen enough lifes “changed” by not following these.
You absolutely can. We do it all the time by paying others to do simple jobs for us. When I pay someone else to mow my lawn I am buying time. If I didn't mind spending time mowing the lawn I would just do it myself.
On the same note, I always think that any change or action leads to unforeseeable results in the future. Literally, you stepping in a shit yesterday could lead to you becoming president in 10 years. The butterfly effect is real and continuously acting on an enormous scale, this is why you should never be too sad or angry about any event, as it is neither good nor bad because no one knows what effect it will have in the long run.
The value of advice comes from arriving at the right moment to the right person, not some platonic, universal “goodness“.
For example, I wanted to drop out of college to work on climate change, and an adult in that community who I respected immensely told me “calm down, it won’t be too late by the time you graduate“.
Not too many people needed the advice to worry less about climate change (especially 15 years ago), but it was exactly what I needed to hear in that moment so that I could focus on actually learning the fundamentals of engineering before throwing myself in
That is a totally fair question, and I have to admit I did not - nuanced stories don’t fit in an online comment!
The Great Recession hit and Obama’s climate push failed[0], so I went into healthcare (as another thing that needed fixing, and which there was political will to do something about).
The lessons of all of those twists are more complex, but I still firmly believe that I got the right advice given what everybody knew at the time.
There's an old story about a young man who cornered a world-famous violinist and begged to be allowed to play for him. If the master offered him encouragement, he would devote his life to music. But if his talent was not equal to his calling, he wanted to know ahead of time so he could avoid wasting his life. He played, and the great violinist shook his head. "You lack the fire," he said.
Decades later the two met again, and the would-be violinist, now a prosperous businessman, recalled their previous meeting. "You changed my entire life," he explained. "It was a bitter disappointment, giving up music, but I forced myself to accept your judgement. Thus, instead of becoming a fourth-rate musician, I've had a good life in the world of commerce. But tell me, how could you tell so readily that I lacked the fire?"
"Oh, I hardly listened when you played," the old master said. "That's what I tell everyone who plays for me -- that they lack the fire."
"But that's unforgivable!" the businessman cried. "How could you do that? You altered the entire course of my life. Perhaps I could have been another Kreisler, another Heifetz--"
The old man shook his head again. "You don't understand," he said. "If you had had the fire, you would have paid no attention to me."
I've heard a similar story about a young man that wanting to become a monk, went to the monastery and one of the old monks there told him: "Go get a doctorate, then come back and choose if you really want to give up everything to meditate." or something along those lines.
The best piece of advice I received was 'slow and steady wins the race'. It's something I heard a 1000 times before and 1000 times after, and it never meant that much to me. When I heard it, though, at just the right time and it made just the right amount of sense that it totally changed my perspective on everything radically since then. It's totally changed the way I operate and the way I look at things. But I can't really communicate to other people what _exactly_ it means to me, because when I say it to other people they just hear 'slow and steady wins the race' the way I did the first 1000 times.
If you put effort into something, you’ll get better at doing it, and it will result in something good, or at least in something tangible. If you do nothing, you get nothing in return.
From:
A Summary Of The Best Life Lessons From Movies: Or, Everything I Know So Far
There’s a chapter on the mind in the book Discourses and Sayings by Abba Dorotheus.
I suppose it can be summarised as “stop lying to yourself”.
There’s some subtlety to what this means. For me a big part of that is not living in my imagination. I used to have lots of imaginary conversations with people, predicting what they would say in those situations. This is dangerous since you end up building mental models based on (unfounded) mental models, instead of on reality. Your emotional responses also get coloured by these imaginary exchanges.
This one is really hard to combat. The overthinking brain imagines every scenario ever, really hard to tune the noise down. I've gotten better at it lately but it's still difficult sometimes.
A technique that can be very effective at breaking patterns of cognition is to every time you find yourself doing it, name it and let it go. Don't try to resist or get angry or attach any emotion to it, just say "I'm just simulating a discussion" and drop it.
Doesn't matter how many times you have to do it in the beginning, every 30 seconds, whatever, as long as you persist in doing this, it will relatively quickly stop the thinking pattern.
OTOH, if you can separate that fantasy from reality, it can help you calm down and produce a good result in the real situation, instead of going in blind. I often run through potential conversations in my head before dealing with bad situations, and I think it's been incredibly helpful.
> There’s some subtlety to what this means. For me a big part of that is not living in my imagination. I used to have lots of imaginary conversations with people, predicting what they would say in those situations. This is dangerous since you end up building mental models based on (unfounded) mental models, instead of on reality. Your emotional responses also get coloured by these imaginary exchanges.
Another important point about this is that if you're in a heated (imaginary) debate with someone, your body reacts as though you are in a heated (real) debate with someone.
This pattern can be a pretty significant source of stress and anxiety.
Thinking critically is a finite process, and creativity arises from the vast space of permuting those elements of knowledge, processes, and information.
Breaking things down qualitatively into concepts is a good first step to speculating and hypothesizing about the details and full taxonomy when there are unknowns.
I couldn't talk properly in certain situations. I was too self-conscious. That meant my communication was poor at workplace. I was too nervous presenting in front of execs and senior leaders.
On the other hand, my friend was fluent and smooth. We both had same roles. After another poor presentation, my friend gently told me "Everyone wipes their butt the same way."
well, not really true. there are huge cultural differences in personal but hygiene. the end result is more or less the same, the process differs widely.
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[ 3.4 ms ] story [ 322 ms ] threadIt led to me staying faaaaar too long in an unhealthy relationship, trying to cure problems that I imagined myself responsible for causing. Sometimes you need to forgive yourself and move on. The Pottery Barn Rule and the Boy Scout Rule apply to things, not people.
"Leave it better than you found it."
I couldn't care less about golf, but this one stuck with me because it speaks to environmental stewardship. It's like a constructive riff on the mantra for when you're out in Nature: "Don't leave a trace."
Don't let others who talk rubbish about you affect your life. Not everyone will like you and that's fine. They are not even "extras" in the movie that is your life.
I’ve watched another SEAL(?), Jocko Willink. He really charges you with “get up regardless, just do it”. And you get up and effing do it, but the next day comes and the game is over.
I start with head rotations, than some arm rotations and stretching, then torso rotations, then stretching the legs by doing lunges (I think they're called), then doing 2 sets of 25 squats with a very wide stance and also stretch my wrist for the last 5 squats of each set, then 10 squats with legs together, then stretching the legs and back by bending forward and reaching for my toes when standing, then some balance, standing on one leg and lifting the other backwards in the air and arms wide apart (this doesn't do anything, but I like improving balance in that stance).
Overall it takes like 3-5 minutes, sometimes after I do some crunches for some core strength and to get the heart pumping.
The squats are the hardest part, and require most motivation, but doing squats in the morning is really good for blood flow (to the brain especially).
I always do the stretches as soon as I wake up, after going to the bathroom but usually before washing my teeth.
Money is infinite in that you can earn more or get a second job or get a better paying job or whatever. (Obviously only to a point but stay with me).
Also: your time does have value or it should since it is limited.
What would you pay for an hour of your life "back"? Or an hour to do whatever you wanted?
The truly smart play is trading money for time.
I've been a freelancer for a while but there was a point when I got laid off from my full time job so I ramped up to make ends meet. And I was fortunate enough that I was basically able to work for myself full time...
But when you are doing that, especially in the early stage...like I know that if I burn a couple hours at my billing rate of $50 an hour trying to save a few dollarydoos on a TV by standing in line for a big sale, am I really saving that much money when I effectively paid $100 to stand in line for two hours, something I don't like doing anyway, instead of just paying a bit more and getting a TV right away and not having to do that?
Another example. Changing the oil on my car. Could I? I'm pretty sure I could. I know the process. I'd probably want to watch some YouTube videos and there's tools I'd need to pick up, but I could be a real manly man and change my own oil and not get screwed by the shop.
But...
Let's say it costs me $40 at Autozone for oil and filter.
Let's say it costs $80 at the shop. A real shop not a jiffy lube. PFFT THOSE GUYS ARE SCREWING YA JUST DO IT YOURSELF.
I'd save $40 doing it DIY.
Most people would be on their way to Autozone...but on the other hand, I am not a mechanic that does 20 of these a day. Between watching videos and trying to figure out where everything is and inevitably covering myself in oil and whatnot.
Let's say it takes me 2 hours and the shop 1 hour. Doesn't matter, I saved 40 bucks! Whadda ripoff!
Would you pay 40 bucks for an hour of your life back? Maybe you like tinkering on cars and thats legit. Satisfaction is another benefit.
But for me, I am effectively paying some other person $40 to get dirty and bang his knuckles and whatnot while I sit in the AC and watch cable and dick around on my phone (which I enjoy much more) AND a lot of places will check and top up your other fluids and top off your tires and do an inspection to see if anything else will need work, which I don't know how to do and obviously they know what they are looking for.
AND because the guy knows what he's doing, it's done faster.
So effectively, yes, I will absolutely pay 40 bucks to hang out and watch basic cable in the air conditioning and make sure my car is good to go and all my fluids are topped off and also I get a whole hour of my life for doing whatever I want.
Don't trade time for money. Trade money for time.
View flipped after that. Do your chores yourself as much as your time allows instead of jumping to pay someone to do it. There are other benefits not discussed here beside the time cost factor.
Give yourself the permission to burn say $25/week on lifestyle. It means you can splash out for the more expensive parking, snack or item without feeling like you have to shop around to go somewhere so you aren't "overcharged".
An example might be if you want a can of coke but the vendor in front of you is charging $2 whereas you know the convenience store 3 minutes walk away would have it for $1. Just buy the thing.
Adjust the $25/week to your income.
Same with more important stuff like brakes. It does take some knowledge but I’m more motivated to get it right than any given pro.
Plenty are working two or more jobs just to barely make it, if they even get to make it.
You're missing your opportunity cost. Would you be doing utility during that hour to make 40 bucks? If not then to maximize your profit to time then you want to do it yourself.
While I understand the point you're trying to make for people wandering by:
I've done my own oil, brakes, etc for as long as I remember. As long as you're not working on a supercar an oil change should take you less than an hour. Ideally inside of 30 minutes. 99.9% of vehicles are simple: place oil bucket under car, open oil cap on engine, gently loosen the oil pan bolt, drain oil. While the oil is draining you can get a second bucket and undo the filter. Reverse the process being careful to not strip the oil pan bolt, fill it up with the manufacturer recommended amount, and you're done. At least in America most AutoZones, Pep Boys, O'Reilly's, etc will take your used oil off your hands for free. As for tire inspection, fill up, etc you should also be doing this yourself. It's another 10 minute job with a $5 tool. I'm of the opinion every home should own an air compressor. It is one of the most universally useful things a person can have.
Why is this important? Oil shops are rife with fraud. The quality of your oil can dramatically influence the life of your car. I've had quick lube places rip me off so many times, leave parts off, etc. For what? I saved 30 minutes but gained another expense. Most of the time unless the shop is very reputable "premium" oils aren't actually royal purple. It's just the same crap they put in everyone else's car. By not paying dealer/etc premiums I save hundreds of dollars and get far better quality oil and service doing it myself. This is a skill I picked up being extremely broke before I got into tech and I've dedicated a small portion of my life to being able to fix (most of) my own issues. To the point I only show up to a shop when I need work that requires an engine crane or transmission lift (I've done transmission work myself before but its worth it to make it someone else's problem).
Do your own oil. You do it once or twice a year, you understand your vehicle better, and you get better oil and filters for the money. Moreover, the average tech connects an ODB-2 alarm checker to your car and then writes you an invoice. Cars are not difficult. If spending 2-3 hours a year is too time-expensive for you I'm not sure what to tell you. I just hope you don't run into a situation far from home where a tow truck is 6 hours away and understanding your car could get you home safe and fast.
The rule is basically: rotate against the direction of the crank's rotation to undo.
north, east, south, west
Doing good enough ... can be enough.
It's easier to build muscle mass before the age of 30 and the muscle you gain during that time will never go away (with a minimum of training).
The earlier you start exercising, the less difficult it will be to maintain your body as you get older. Someone who has never exercised but wants to lose weight by their 40s will have a much harder time than someone who started exercising early.
More than that, working out has a significant impact on my productivity, mood and psychological health. It changed my life.
Not an exercise guru, just someone who slipped a disc.
but, please no more sit ups. Even the marines figured out it is bad for the spine.
If you're 40ish and new to physical fitness, don't despair. I turn 39 tomorrow and am in the best shape of my life.
Anything done consistently is better than nothing, but done perfect.
Losing fat is a simple calorie deficit. Find a way to do it consistently and you will lose weight. This cannot be scienced out of.
I prescribed myself a bicycle, biked hard while singing every night until I couldn't breathe, and very soon I was regularly hungry and fit.
What did I need to learn? I'm not just a brain on a stick.
Why would that not also be true of muscle you build later in life? It might be harder to acquire it, but it should be similarly long-lasting.
Granting here, I'm sure it's definitely easier to resume old habits after injury recovery than to start completely fresh, so yeah, still start young if you're young. But if you're not, it's never too late until you're in the ground.
Take care of your body for your whole life.
Try to be nice and helpful to others.
Nothing that you do or say will matter after a couple of hundred years.
It’s better to regret something you’ve done, than something you haven’t.
I don't think this is true at all.
It may never be written in history books but every person alive today has an unbroken string of “things done” that stretches back in time.
And even if you never had children, anything you did or said that resulted in someone else having children shook the pillars of history.
One that I could call ~practical is “there is no eternal friendship, only common interests”. And a related one is “never do business with friends and relatives”. I’ve seen enough lifes “changed” by not following these.
Helped me with the anxiety I always had about loosing people, opportunities and such
For example, I wanted to drop out of college to work on climate change, and an adult in that community who I respected immensely told me “calm down, it won’t be too late by the time you graduate“.
Not too many people needed the advice to worry less about climate change (especially 15 years ago), but it was exactly what I needed to hear in that moment so that I could focus on actually learning the fundamentals of engineering before throwing myself in
The Great Recession hit and Obama’s climate push failed[0], so I went into healthcare (as another thing that needed fixing, and which there was political will to do something about).
The lessons of all of those twists are more complex, but I still firmly believe that I got the right advice given what everybody knew at the time.
[0] https://www.politico.com/story/2012/11/obama-says-climate-ch...
There's an old story about a young man who cornered a world-famous violinist and begged to be allowed to play for him. If the master offered him encouragement, he would devote his life to music. But if his talent was not equal to his calling, he wanted to know ahead of time so he could avoid wasting his life. He played, and the great violinist shook his head. "You lack the fire," he said.
Decades later the two met again, and the would-be violinist, now a prosperous businessman, recalled their previous meeting. "You changed my entire life," he explained. "It was a bitter disappointment, giving up music, but I forced myself to accept your judgement. Thus, instead of becoming a fourth-rate musician, I've had a good life in the world of commerce. But tell me, how could you tell so readily that I lacked the fire?"
"Oh, I hardly listened when you played," the old master said. "That's what I tell everyone who plays for me -- that they lack the fire."
"But that's unforgivable!" the businessman cried. "How could you do that? You altered the entire course of my life. Perhaps I could have been another Kreisler, another Heifetz--"
The old man shook his head again. "You don't understand," he said. "If you had had the fire, you would have paid no attention to me."
https://kagi.com/search?q=when+the+master+is+ready+the+stude...
If you put effort into something, you’ll get better at doing it, and it will result in something good, or at least in something tangible. If you do nothing, you get nothing in return.
From: A Summary Of The Best Life Lessons From Movies: Or, Everything I Know So Far
I suppose it can be summarised as “stop lying to yourself”.
There’s some subtlety to what this means. For me a big part of that is not living in my imagination. I used to have lots of imaginary conversations with people, predicting what they would say in those situations. This is dangerous since you end up building mental models based on (unfounded) mental models, instead of on reality. Your emotional responses also get coloured by these imaginary exchanges.
This one is really hard to combat. The overthinking brain imagines every scenario ever, really hard to tune the noise down. I've gotten better at it lately but it's still difficult sometimes.
Doesn't matter how many times you have to do it in the beginning, every 30 seconds, whatever, as long as you persist in doing this, it will relatively quickly stop the thinking pattern.
Another important point about this is that if you're in a heated (imaginary) debate with someone, your body reacts as though you are in a heated (real) debate with someone.
This pattern can be a pretty significant source of stress and anxiety.
-you miss 100% of the shots you don't take.
Breaking things down qualitatively into concepts is a good first step to speculating and hypothesizing about the details and full taxonomy when there are unknowns.
I couldn't talk properly in certain situations. I was too self-conscious. That meant my communication was poor at workplace. I was too nervous presenting in front of execs and senior leaders.
On the other hand, my friend was fluent and smooth. We both had same roles. After another poor presentation, my friend gently told me "Everyone wipes their butt the same way."