They said your comment came across as antisocial, they didn't diagnose you with an antisocial disorder - there's a significant degree of difference between those two things.
I was actually about to stop reading, until I went to figure out what he was writing in that section. I don't like the intro, but that particular section is quite an interesting perspective. So thanks for pointing that out.
I tried getting diagnosed but was rejected on completely bogus claims like being able to sit still and tell the weekdays backwards. There's also an insane fear of stimulants in my country and psychiatrists are afraid to prescribe it due to the legal system treating them as bad as cartels. Everytime I think back on that rejection I get an intense wave of anger and feel like I'm going to vomit. I'm not sure if I could call this a "traumatic event" or not.
Hyperfocus is the defining part of my life. I always try to get myself busy and being completely absorbed in a task is the only thing that calms me down. I have a constant monologue in my head addressing myself in second person and keep having made up scenarios and such. It truly is awful and someone would probably call me insane if they knew just how much is going on. I take Modafinil which helps a lot but I really wish I could take Concerts. But I'm thankful for what I have since others have even less. I also have a massive collection of notes on various products and subjects.
Socially the most embarrassing thing is over sharing. I do that a lot. It's caused me a lot of anxiety.
It's also pretty hard for me to relate and interact with people that don't have ADHD. My best friends also have it.
I think you should allow yourself the kindness to recognize what you went through with not being able to get diagnosed as a traumatic event, because it was.
I feel for ya. Even though I'm medicated for my pretty bad ADHD when the medication wears off at night I still have to set limits on myself to basically limit social media and other things in which I interact with other humans. Because otherwise I know I'll wake up the next morning regretting most of the interactions because I just say dumb stuff. But I recognize it and it's something that you could do even when you're not medicated. I know it's extremely hard to do without proper medication, having that external help with your executive functioning, but you can get yourself quite a bit ahead by implementing a whole lot of mindfulness. And I'm not talking about the tranquil internet kind of mindfulness I'm talking about the put your foot down on yourself kind of mindfulness. You have to be strict with yourself and you have to be honest with yourself in setting limits and in setting boundaries.
Notes are good. Rabbit holes are good. Oversharing is good mattering on the setting and I still make mistakes with that and that's just the thing that you're going to have to learn that you do and recognize when you do it.
Another thing I have to add here is that; only you are ever going to believe how bad you actually suffer from ADHD. Don't let anyone else in your life tell you that you're more capable than you know that you are. I know that sounds really backwards but people with ADHD are really insecure and they're constantly bombarded with normal people telling them that they have potential. There have been moments in my life where I've been set back because I listened to people who told me that I'm not as disabled as I actually am. I have to follow my gut so often with what I know I go through every day.
But from the get-go we're at a deficit here and on those days that we have the energy in our tanks to be at 100%, we're still not even close to fully well-rounded enough to be at a normal person's 100%. The best way that I've been able to frame this in these modern times that we're now in is how people are reacting to getting long covid. How normal people in quotes react to getting long covid when the symptoms of it appear to be extremely similar to having ADHD with a bit of depression and how people are just like I can't work anymore I can't do this I can't do that and a part of me wants to go up to them and be like well there's your eye opening experience this is what it's like for someone with ADHD who is depressed...
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[ 3.3 ms ] story [ 42.1 ms ] threadSometimes it can be helpful to hear from others how we come across because it's hard to see for ourselves
I wasn't. Even if it seemed that way. See why I made the comment the way I made it? Doesn't matter.
Hyperfocus is the defining part of my life. I always try to get myself busy and being completely absorbed in a task is the only thing that calms me down. I have a constant monologue in my head addressing myself in second person and keep having made up scenarios and such. It truly is awful and someone would probably call me insane if they knew just how much is going on. I take Modafinil which helps a lot but I really wish I could take Concerts. But I'm thankful for what I have since others have even less. I also have a massive collection of notes on various products and subjects.
Socially the most embarrassing thing is over sharing. I do that a lot. It's caused me a lot of anxiety.
It's also pretty hard for me to relate and interact with people that don't have ADHD. My best friends also have it.
I feel for ya. Even though I'm medicated for my pretty bad ADHD when the medication wears off at night I still have to set limits on myself to basically limit social media and other things in which I interact with other humans. Because otherwise I know I'll wake up the next morning regretting most of the interactions because I just say dumb stuff. But I recognize it and it's something that you could do even when you're not medicated. I know it's extremely hard to do without proper medication, having that external help with your executive functioning, but you can get yourself quite a bit ahead by implementing a whole lot of mindfulness. And I'm not talking about the tranquil internet kind of mindfulness I'm talking about the put your foot down on yourself kind of mindfulness. You have to be strict with yourself and you have to be honest with yourself in setting limits and in setting boundaries.
Notes are good. Rabbit holes are good. Oversharing is good mattering on the setting and I still make mistakes with that and that's just the thing that you're going to have to learn that you do and recognize when you do it.
Another thing I have to add here is that; only you are ever going to believe how bad you actually suffer from ADHD. Don't let anyone else in your life tell you that you're more capable than you know that you are. I know that sounds really backwards but people with ADHD are really insecure and they're constantly bombarded with normal people telling them that they have potential. There have been moments in my life where I've been set back because I listened to people who told me that I'm not as disabled as I actually am. I have to follow my gut so often with what I know I go through every day.
But from the get-go we're at a deficit here and on those days that we have the energy in our tanks to be at 100%, we're still not even close to fully well-rounded enough to be at a normal person's 100%. The best way that I've been able to frame this in these modern times that we're now in is how people are reacting to getting long covid. How normal people in quotes react to getting long covid when the symptoms of it appear to be extremely similar to having ADHD with a bit of depression and how people are just like I can't work anymore I can't do this I can't do that and a part of me wants to go up to them and be like well there's your eye opening experience this is what it's like for someone with ADHD who is depressed...