Ask HN: Are there any books that changed your life during college or school?

45 points by debanjan16 ↗ HN
Life changing is open to your interpretation. It can be anything like changing majors to arriving at some serious realization. In short, it caused a tremendous mind shift that led you to take certain decisions that helped you in the long run.

Any reason for which you still remember that book or its contents. Also mention the reason.

100 comments

[ 3.9 ms ] story [ 205 ms ] thread
It wasn't during college (I dropped out) but in 2020 I did the audio version of "How To Win Friends and Influence People" which had a profound impact on how I handled day to day conversations.

A few others:

The Simple Path to Wealth - JL Collins (changed my entire investment strategy)

Breath - James Nestor (something so routine but there is so much to learn)

A Short History of Everything - Bill Bryson (silly, but its a pretty large and encompassing look at various parts of life from the galaxy to the planet to cells)

Ha! I came here to mention "How To Win Friends and Influence People" as well.

I read it more when I was around 38 or so, but it really helped me change how I interacted with people.

While it's ostensibly a book about sales, I took it as breaking down selling into the idea that if you get along with people and they like you, they will want to work with you. That can take the form of making more sales, but I took it as having people want to do more with you and be around you more.

And how does that happen? Kinda simple: be nice to people, be genuinely interested in them (even if their interests aren't your core ones, they still are often curious), and genuinely try to get to know people.

I took this as a great life lesson for making friends and getting along better with the whole world. And from that flows nice things. And if it's what you need/want, more sales. But it doesn't have to be about sales.

I always had a negative view of this book with such a silly title until I read 'The Snowball: Warren Buffett and the Business of Life' and learned that not only did Buffet read the book but also went to great lengths in applying it to his daily life.

So I figured it must be worth a try and learned a few valuable lessons, even though some of them seem kind of obvious - with the benefit of hindsight.

The title is indeed a trigger for some people, and I’d encourage those to people to get over the title and just read 25 pages to see if it’s your thing.

> even though some of them seem kind of obvious

It may be obvious to you… but believe it or not, there are people who have never seen these things spelled out in plain language and who never discovered these lessons on their own. Such people are not to be disregarded, we all have different strengths and weaknesses.

I’ve not seen another book that really spells out how to make friends and keep them. Everyone is supposed to learn this in Kindergarten, but many do not.

The book is almost 100 years old. Some of the examples have not aged well unless you can be generous in your understanding of the times in which it was written. The examples are still very useful.

> 'It may be obvious to you… but believe it or not, there are people who have never seen these things spelled out in plain language and who never discovered these lessons on their own.'

Indeed, good points well made, what I meant was that I have been such a person and have been guilty of failings that, when I look back, should have been obvious at the time but were not, for whatever reason.

"be nice to people, be genuinely interested in them (even if their interests aren't your core ones, they still are often curious), and genuinely try to get to know people."

It's a truly sad comment on our society that so many people have to be taught to do this and effectively be bribed to do it (the bribe being in the form of getting friends and success) instead of it coming naturally.

I also question how "genuine" such interest is, when it's done by people looking for a success/friendship payoff. It seems more manipulative than anything to me.

This Bill Bryson book is REALLY good ! Kudos for mentionning it.

/me putting it next to my bed, for a rereading.

I read How to Win Friends in school and it was quite impactful, especially as a socially inept kid in a small town.

It changed how I viewed social interactions and made me realise it’s just another skill you can work at, with guidance even.

I'll second the recommendation of Bryson's A Short History of Everything. The thing I liked most about that book was its depiction of truly exceptional people in the history of science.
Design Patterns in Java.

First time i've seen and experienced the power of abstraction in programming.

"How to Fail at Everything and Still Win Big" by Scott Adams. I have purchased and disliked every book he's released since then, but I found quite a bit of useful, actionable life advice in that book. I can honestly say that the book changed the way I look at life and made me a more positive and ambitious person.

This one was right when he was just on the edge of being overly impressed with himself, so the lessons include more humility and less lecturing. His later books still have useful material but the delivery and underlying smugness is jarring.

In short, it's a book you can get a lot from without liking or agreeing with Scott Adams on most of his public opinions.

Exactly the same experience with the book, and agreed on his smugness since then.
The Bible.
> Any reason for which you still remember that book or its contents. Also mention the reason.
I’m not OP and I’m not religious. I read the Bible to learn about many of the cultural references to it and to see what the big deal was. I was fascinated by two sections: Ecclesiastes, in which the author explains why “there is nothing new under the sun “, and Relevations which seems to be an incredible drug-induced hallucination about how the world will end. Whether true or not, Revelations is entertaining. I treat it the same way I do reading “Lord of the Rings”. Entertainment and a good story.
Ecclesiastes may be my favorite book of the Old Testament as I find it provides a very pragmatic perspective on modern day materialism and other vices.

I don't want to start a theological flame war here but I think it's extremely unfortunate that the Dispensationalist's view of Revelation is the face of North American Protestantism. It's a rather new theology (mid 1800's) but I think it's what most non Christians, that have more than a passing interest in such matters, ascribe to the faith. For those of us who don't subscribe to this theology, the events predicted in Revelation already happened in 70 A.D.

Well, I still read it multiple times a week :). I wasn't raised in a Christian home but I discovered Christ while I was in college. As many people in this age group, I was trying to make sense of my surroundings and experiences. I read a number of writings during this time and was exposed to different world views in a World Religions class if IRC. I read some eastern philosophy, Zen, Confucius etc. But I found the Bible provided the best description and explanations of what I experienced and witnessed in the world. I also think it provided the best description of our existence, meaning and purpose as a species. However, there was no one big Aha moment or anything like that. It was a gradual process and took many years to come to this opinion.

As a Christian, I believe there is always something to be learned from the Holy Scriptures and that the words themselves have significance beyond just letters on a page. The apostle John started his gospel with these words: "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God." I take this quite literally.

How has the Bible changed my life? I believe the commitment to Christ's teachings and the seeking of the Holy Spirit's counsel is the primary reason I've been happily married for 25 years and have been blessed with two sons that have grown into very lovable and capable young men themselves. Obviously it's not all been a bed of roses, marriage and life is hard at times. But the teachings, hope and promise provide by Christ Jesus has assisted me immensely in navigating life's hurdles.

Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison.

Read it in my first semester as a freshman Biochem major in college with a great grad student as the teacher of a class on American Lit. Really changed how I thought about books and how I approached writing.

The class was incredibly challenging. I stopped going to my chemistry classes and changed my major to English/Creative Writing.

That was 20 years ago and things have worked out OK. I’m sure I’m happier now (business management career) than I would be in a scientific field.

Reread it this past summer with my college age daughter who was reading it for school. Realized how much more of it I understood now, and how little of it could possibly make sense to her. The experiential depiction of a Black man in Harlem in the 1940s/1950s is like the purest amber fossil. That world in so many ways no longer exists but the vivid rendition brings it alive. Brilliant, brilliant book to read as an adult.
Ha, yeah I was just wondering about that. I haven’t re-read more than a few passages of it since that class. I remember the world Ellison described and the feeling of being there on the street with the narrator was so real.

Turns out it’s only $2.99 on Kindle right now. That’s inspiration enough to give it another read :)

Chaos by James Gleick was wildly inspiring to me
Can you expand a bit more?
The book discusses the journey of exploring complex equations that represent weather patterns. The mathematical representation of these highly complex systems appear to be nondeterministic at first glance, but patterns do appear which are highly dependent on initial conditions. This gives the insight that our complex systems which seem chaotic are actually deterministic in the end and we can predict the outcomes of any physical system if we understand how all of the variables interact.
hmmh, what I got out of it was a little different ... simple deterministic systems can have surprisingly complex emergent behavior that is quite hard to predict.

normally, if you disturb a system three things can happen, it can be stable, it can explode, or it can oscillate. corresponding to e^x where x is a complex number or a matrix.

but actually in the liminal area at the edge of cyclical behavior there is a mode that is neither cyclical nor stable and it happens quite a bit and is responsible for many interesting and important phenomena and systems.

there isn't much regularity, the only way to predict is a model of the evolution of the whole system which is highly sensitive to small disturbances or measurement errors.

I liked this book too. It was a good introduction to fractals.
For me it was the book Ishmael by Daniel Quinn.

His biases are clear, but even if you disagree with him, looking past those there is still the very important lesson that much of what we take for granted as true about the world is really not much more than shared mythology, not some objective, universal truth.

So regardless of what you think about his particular viewpoint I think that’s an important lesson that helps you examine the world and assumptions we all make more critically.

If there is such a thing as a “red pill” moment, that book was it for me. After reading it there were many things about our culture that I just couldn’t take seriously anymore.

(comment deleted)
A short book called 'Principles of Spiritual Growth' by Miles Stanford really helped explain Christianity to me in a way that churches, pastors, never did, and helped me move away from fear-based beliefs to ones about forgiveness. Really changed the tone and direction of my life.
Just ordered this book. Thanks for the recommendation.
Probably The Singularity by Ray Kurtzweil. Came across it at random digging through the tiny tech section of my university library.

I don't think until that point I had really understood the idea of accelerating progress, like I knew that I wanted to work in technology just out of interest, but that book really instilled in me that the pace of change could be really quite rapid through my career, which to me made it all the more exciting. Certainly in my career in software so far that's turned out to be the case.

This Changes Everything - Naomi Klein.

This was a good alternative view to how we were taught the world was “meant” to be run

"Demon haunted world" by Carl Sagan It allowed me the knowledge and linguistic framework to explore issues that had bothered me for years, like pseudoscience, the supernatural and poor critical thinking skills. The chapter "The baloney detection kit" alone is worth the price of the book.
“All quiet on Western front”, as well as the follow up novels “Three Comrades” and “Arc de Triumph” by Erich Maria Remarque.

I’ve read it when I was in my late teens / early twenties and it sort of changed my outlook on things. My then very naive and straightforward view of the world where right and wrong are obvious was shattered. It’s kind of made me sad and that sadness has remained with me ever since.

Since that time it’s been my answer to a question about a book that has had the most impact on me.

I have just watched the All quiet on Western front (2022) movie and it's really moving.
After "Saving Private Ryan", this one is one of the most grounded, well-depicted war movie.
Atlas Shrugged

I read it while starting a company, and it was exactly what I needed to suffer that process.

Obligatory John Rogers quote:

"There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs."

A related quote I'm reminded of: It's no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society" (quote attributed to Jiddu Krishnamurti). Im not sure if JR made the comments about Atlas Shrugged, suggesting it to be a negative influence.
The typical flippant dismissal of Atlas Shrugged kept me from reading it until well into my 40's.

I'm not a huge fan of the book, but for me it was a viewpoint often missing now days. For some people it's a good wake up call. If one want to trade in some of our sicker tendencies in this society for better virtues then perhaps it may be appropriate.

Do you still relate to what was presented in AS?
Yes and no. For example, I'm a die hard capitalist, but I recognize the need to understand how much we externalize today onto the public.
Small Gods by Terry Pratchett, and the whole series on Discworld greatly affected how I think about life, and to look beyond first assumptions.
Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance. I picked it up for the first time in the 7th grade and have reread it about a dozen times since. The book is deeply thought provoking about what constitutes knowledge and served as a light introduction to epistemology and metaphysics. I later went on to study philosophy and computer science in college, largely because of this book. The long discussions about the scientific method still resonate with me, and every time an experiment “goes wrong” I remember that one of the lessons in the book is that there really is no such thing as a failed experiment as long as you are open to what the world is telling you.

The book is also an easy read because the entire thing is told in the form of a father-son travelogue. The fact that the author pulled off a travelogue about the philosophy of science is an amazing feat of exposition. So another lesson is about the value of good communication.

I didn't got the end though. Not sure what happened and if everything before that was true or only the imagination of the I that, well, went away?
The author has stated that the end was inspired by The Turn of the Screw (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Turn_of_the_Screw) so my feeling is: you’re not really supposed to know. I’ve always interpreted the ending as the dissolution of the main character’s persona and the return of Phaedrus.
The Autobiography of Malcolm X. I always had the impression that Malcolm was the bad boy of his era. His reputation is much worse than King(who is seen as a hero). After reading it, it's all undeserved. He's not a pacifist sure, but the forces acting on him weren't pacifists either. It changed my world view, and did a lot to lift some blinders I had on. Of course he is from a different era, but many of the things he was struggling against are still in the USA today(sadly). So still relevant.
This is really high up on my list too. I came in with the same preconception about him that you describe. It was inspiring to see how he changed throughout the book.
It was a sequence of books that I read not immediately one after the other, but that had an impact on me once I started to connect some concepts and ideas among them:

1. Simplicity, William Jensen 2. Getting Things Done (GTD) 3. Getting Real, Jason Fried

The Power of Habits by Charles Duhigg. Set me up for my way of thinking about how I get things done for the rest of my life.
Neal Stephenson's Diamond Age, had to read it in literature class.

The main character gets an A.I. powered book that teaches them anything. pretty mind blowing for me, I imagine one day possibly something like that could exist.