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Once you read the literature that’s been out for a while now—lots of it too—which shows that SARS-CoV-2 does not limit itself to the respiratory organs and its capacity to do widespread harm includes impairing the immune system, and also isn’t seasonal, then no, it doesn’t at all look like that.

It’s simply lots of people being sick for a long time.

"Satire requires a clarity of purpose and target lest it be mistaken for and contribute to that which it intends to criticize."
Who are special interests in this scenario and how do they benefit by kids being out of school?
Must be all those progressive union teachers infesting rural Eastern Kentucky?

idk, when do conspiricists need to be coherent?

Covid is a vascular disease and amongst other things affects erectile function. It's the condom lobby at work, clearly.
I understand that psychiatric complications are common with COVID and especially repeated exposure. If you get vaccinated, it can help. Good luck.