Ask HN: Conflicted about my FAANG work place
I know I am in an extremely privileged position but nevertheless I need help.
Facts: I work at “the” FAANG company as a Software Engineer. I make about ~350k per year living in the Bay Area. I am close to 20 years into my career and have never gotten promoted or risen through a corporate ladder for various reasons. We are a family of 4 that I support on my income alone.
Thoughts: I am reasonably “smart”. I can do what I need to do at my job. Typically get EE ratings for performance at my current job. However I don’t look forward to what do at work. I do my work because it’s pays the bills and I know that so many people would metaphorically speaking kill to have what I have. I feel guilty about complaining. I am not sure what’s the best approach for me me is to move forward if my goal is financial independence. I know rsijg up at my current job to a Leadership role would get me to financial independence but I just don’t see the path. My company is extremely large and I am a cog in the wheel. I have always thought about being my own boss but never have actually done it. I would like to create my own startup but I also realize that pursuing that means quitting my well paying job to take a MASSIVE chance. While I would have no problems do that if it were just me I have 3 people that depend on me and it’s not like if I create a startup I can earn a comparable salary in the early days. Logically speaking I should keep my job and try to do something on the side that gets me to financial independence doing something that actually interests me or make my peace and try an rise up where I am. But I also know you can’t rise up if you are bored at work.
I want to hear from people who are or have been in a similar boat to understand how you have thought through this.
41 comments
[ 3.5 ms ] story [ 129 ms ] threadWhy not?
>I know rsijg up at my current job to a Leadership role would get me to financial independence but I just don’t see the path.
Why don't you see a path?
How long can you support your family without a job?
It’s a good question and I don’t know the answer. I wish I knew the answer as I know it would help me. I show up and I just am not motivated as I feel like what’s the point. There is no reward (for me) or appreciation or any real benefit to what I provide (as I see leadership factions questioning my project and general politics of furthering their own agenda for their own growth. I am all for doing the work but if I know there is no growth for me here what’s the point.
> Why don’t you see a path
So many reorgs and changes of directions every few months. I know my (mid level) manager is a good person but he has no choice but the feed be BS that you will be promoted in a year or so and hang in there. I would do the same if I were in his shoes cos I know he has no control of any of this.
> how long can I support my family. At least a year (depleting all my cash savings)
I wonder a lot if am I an anomaly or there are a lot of people in FANGs just like this.
At the end of the day you are supporting a family so that in itself is the point of what you're doing. I think most ppl that have ever lived had to do stuff they didnt quite enjoy every day and can relate, but probably not most ppl in FAANG.
Maybe also seek some kind of therapy, just talking to a professional could help.
The startup / work for yourself thing is risky and may end up more stressful, but at least you do have cushion to try it. But I don't think that's the answer.. there's something deeper.
I also am obsessed about financial independence, in the Bay Area, with comparable years of experience, started from 0, but circumstances are very different from yours (with a partner but no kids). I currently have 100 years of living expenses saved up, by a combination of frugality, aggressive job hopping to find the highest bidder, and diligent investing. For me there was never anything else than financial independence.
Is it possible that you are really not optimizing for financial freedom, and that’s not as important of a goal for you compared to providing a really good lifestyle for your family, which you clearly are?
You don’t need to answer me, but please ask yourself this question.
But I am fairly burned out so it’s likely I will permanently quit within the next couple years or so. In a weird way, I would welcome a layoff as forcing function to move on from corporate.
- If your current role is in a non-growth area and you're a good performer, maybe see what your options are in terms of transferring to a team that better matches what you're looking for?
- You've mentioned side projects in the context of financial independence; have you considered side projects or hobbies as a way of finding meaning that you're lacking at work?
- If you haven't already, consider seriously discussing career growth with your manager -- any decent manager should be interested in helping you find opportunities.
Also keep in mind differences in work-life balance.
I think if your goal is financial independence at this stage, founding a startup is a poor strategy. Perhaps lowing your cost of living somehow and looking at traditional investments to bulk up savings would be a better option. To combat the boredom you could look for a high paid job in a more interesting large company. Or, experiment with side projects and see how you go. Obviously your chances of success are lower when you don't go "all-in", but it gives you a taste of entrepreneurship.
How did your risk turn out for you? What would you do differently if you were to do it again?
Id start by seriously reconsidering your finances. If you make all the money, you call all the shots, your three dependents all on a free ride need to respect that. Furthermore- “family of 4 that I support with my income alone” - barring the case that you have an infant, your partner should be pulling more weight, too. Single income households are not feasible in California without major compromise: and that major compromise is currently occurring at your expense
We have one life and there is something to be said about raising kids in a home environment that is “healthy” especially when we brought them into this world. I feel especially strongly about this as my kids are still little (< 10 years)
Totally understand that this may not be a point of view shared across the masses - specially here in USA where the general attitude is everybody is doing it so you shouldnt crib about it. For us our kids are a big priority and not sacrifing the evnromment they are raised in is a core value. Fyi I don’t mean environment as physically the size of house we live in etc it’s the softer thing - the home atmosphere. I live in a small apartment and we are cool with it. More importantly we live in a happy home.
IMHO, financial independence does not mean "Having a fuck-you money to do whatever I want, whenever I do." It's more about managing your own expectation.
Yes. ~4.5 years. Prior was small companies.
> ~FU Money
In the words of JL Collins (youtube him for fu money) ,to me , it’s about operating from a place where you have options to say no to things that does not interest you. I would still work but not for “the man” and deal with the politics and be on the receiving end of task given by people who are above me simply trying to further their agenda and/or have no idea the real need of the organization/team/customer etc
Part of my challenge, (because of my obsession with build something people want) with jumping into my own startup is don’t have an “idea” or problem and how to go exploring it. So I feel I don’t have anything that people want. Since you have done a startup can you share anything that helped you through the ideating phase to pick a direction to start with? Any books or resources would also be great that expand on the ideating phase. If I had an understanding of how to go through that journey I would do that in my spare time and that would also allow me to jump into the idea more confidently when the time came.
With regards to financial independence, I recommend reading the likes of Mr. Money Mustache. He was able to achieve it in his 30's making less than you do.
I don’t see myself getting promoted to leadership because software is generally extremely uninteresting to me. My goal is to just work and save as much as I can for as long as I can until I can retire (relatively young) or work on side projects and hopefully eventually monetize.
Don’t know if this helps, but you definitely aren’t the only person feeling this way.
Most of the successful people had some passion/skills which they could monetize but if you start looking for options to just earn money then eventually you would still land in same situation where you don't enjoy what you do but it pays the bills.
Also, regarding creating your own startup, do you have any VC friends? How would you like to get funding for it? Network is important.
Both can be boring. Solo can be boring when the thrill wears off and becomes a grind.
Do you have meetings with your skip manager? It sounds like your manager is not going to bat for you. I have had to drive my own promotions at various times in my career. I am not interested in leadership though, and that's a pretty different skill set. If that's of interest, you may need to actually cut things that don't better demonstrate that skill as best you can.
Do you have a FIRE number? I won't be leaving this cushy gig until I hit my number, but I do have a number. It has helped me time box my working career. I don't really need to be above-and-beyond satisfied with my job because that's not why I am working. I do get that being interested in the work helps the time pass, but IMO that's a double edged sword. People that care too much tend to get sucked into more responsibilities, which in turn can cause a brittle team dynamic with too much landing on one person. Of course experience and personalities vary.
For me, I would easily get obsessive if I were to start my own company and it would not be in a healthy way. I have also had too many friends try the startup route and really paid the price in a stagnated career. With a clear path to FIRE it's just not worth the risk IMO. I have family and plenty of hobbies to enjoy my time until then.
Good luck!
There’s some science behind leadership. It’s not an ability you need to be born with, and it doesn’t matter if you’re introverted or extroverted.
Jumping into a startup is taking a big chance. I did it and spent everything I had. You could try a side project, and if it gets some traction, look for investors. Then think about quitting your FAANG job.
If you’re looking for some more meaningful work, see if your company has 20% time. Then you can work on something because you like it, not because you have to.
It's exactly what I did and I have never looked back (going on 7 years now).
If you don't have the motivation to work an extra hour or two after your day job, you won't have the motivation to make a startup work.
Finding that "thing" always seems like a daunting task.
For starters, check out this blog: https://earlyretirementextreme.com/.
It's written by a guy who achieved FI within just 5 years of making $80k a year. Granted, he didn't have kids, but you're making over 4x as much as he was.