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drivebyacct2
I'm concerned that this isn't a joke. Or is it?
Kluny
I think someone was ordered to come up with these characters as punishment for screwing up something else.
mitchellhislop
I don't think it is - Its linked at the top of http://www.groupon.com/occasions, which can be gotten to from their normal flow.

This is totally real.

MichaelGG
I'd guess it went something like this:

Manager: "We need a kids club thing, like Burger King." Designers: "That's lame, let's make it a joke." Manager: "Excellent, go live with it."

manuscreationis
This has to be some kind of undiscovered April fools joke, or something some designer put together as a joke that went live.

However, worst kids club characters? or best!

Roll sounds totally radical. As someone who also loves homemade croissants, I can relate to this character.

Does anyone else think Glasses and e-m@le will totally have a crush thing going on?

Also, I sense a very special episode where Swarmy and Pyles learn that everyone is a little different, but it's what makes us similar that really counts.

ayuvar
There's a ridiculous amount of potential for episodes about a sentient swarm of bees.

How will they reconcile many humans' fear of them with their need to be loved and understood as intellectual equals?

manuscreationis
How about the episode where a pair of bumbling bad guys try to kidnap Swarmy to produce their honey, which they then sell!

Not only does the gang need to rescue Swarmy, but they also need to teach Swarmy to trust humans again...

mey
Pyles acts as the negotiator.
kingatomic
Not to mention the lengthy litigation following cease-and-desist letters, pursuant to the patent the Kidz Club filed on bee honey made from genetically-enhanced beez (sic).
antihero
Or trick people into bringing their carriers into zero zero before ganking them.
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webnrrd2k
Don't forget about the long-lost sibling-swarm of Africanized bees that is actually a jerk, but with a heart of gold (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/JerkWithAHeartOfG...).
manuscreationis
I believe that was the episode where FopTop taught Glasses how to be a refined lady in order to impress e-m@le, but then in the end realized that e-m@le liked her for who she was, not who she thought he wanted her to be.

We all learned a little something that day...

gavinlynch
It's a joke. Read the bullet points in the "Tips to Get Involved in Your Community" section:

* "HELP elderly folks cross the first part of the street and then encourage them to get across the rest of the way on their own!"

* "DON'T desecrate that statue even though you'd gain tons of street cred!"

* "START a lemonade stand but immediately go "Out of Business" to draw attention to wealth-destroying minimum wage laws!"

Have at it, kids.

raganwald
I bet it’s a joke as well, but it’s not witty enough to work as a joke, the “inside jokes” should make you feel clever and exclusive when you see them.

And I should know, I’ve been falling flat on my face trying to be clever on the Internet for years.

whatgoodisaroad
I think they feel clever and exclusive because of all the HN readers they tricked. You're not always on the inside of an inside joke.
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WiseWeasel
Where did you find that? I'm not seeing that content.

The song is very special, however.

[edit] nm, it was under the 'games' directory:

http://www.groupon.com/pages/kidz-club-games

That's definitely one of the better company April Fools type jokes I've seen in a while. [/edit]

dclowd9901
Seems like it'd be obvious, but I guess not. It's very clear some 90s kids sat in a room and thought, "You know what'd be hilarious? If we did our own version of the BK Kidz Club." Probably were also on under the influence of something.
Stevenup7002
"TIPS TO GET INVOLVED IN YOUR COMMUNITY:

START a lemonade stand but immediately go "Out of Business" to draw attention to wealth-destroying minimum wage laws!"

derleth
Here's some helpful tips from the Kidz Club Games and Tips Page:

> HELP elderly folks cross the first part of the street and then encourage them to get across the rest of the way on their own!

> DON'T desecrate that statue even though you'd gain tons of street cred!

> START a lemonade stand but immediately go "Out of Business" to draw attention to wealth-destroying minimum wage laws!

Whether you should copy that floppy is presumably left up to your own judgement.

nostromo
Definitley a joke. Did you see this gem?

  Unscramble these mixed-up words:

  cilhd

  entcered

  mraketing
I actually found that one quite funny. :)
untog
If there was any doubt as to whether this is a joke, listen to the theme song. Good lord.
hammock
I just talked to a friend at Groupon who helped write it. Apparently they have a "humor team" whose job it is to come up with stuff like this.
whamill
That's actually more depressing than if this were real.
rudyfink
On the subject of kids pages, if you haven't seen the NSA's CryptoKids ( http://www.nsa.gov/kids/ ), CIA's (https://www.cia.gov/kids-page/) or the NRO's ( http://www.nro.gov/kidspages.html ) kids pages, I'd recommend a quick look.
tesseractive
I didn't look at the URL before clicking, so I was totally disappointed that it wasn't for National Review Online. Podhoretz for kids is just an awesome, awesome idea.
DanBC
Wow, the NSA trademark everything.

> Crypto Cat®, Decipher Dog®, Rosetta Stone®, Slate®, Joules™, T.Top®, CyberTwins™ Cy and Cyndi, and, of course, our leader CSS Sam®.

grkballer44
I'm pretty sure FOPTOP is a drunk who they found passed out on the beach
krogsgard
Spelling "kidz" with a z is a pretty good warning of how awful it's bound to be.
mrcoles
This is great—the write-ups are hilarious!

> When Roll grows up, he wants to be an astronaut or a game show cameraman.

[dead] shareme
If they were joking I would imagine each character would be a satirical look at each VC character that bought in on the Groupon disaster.

Come on Groupon amp up the creativity

egypturnash
This is what happens when you don't pay a real artist.

Also I am totally gonna start shipping Foptop and Swarmz.

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