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The mere mention (as a joke?) that it'd be impossible, or something close to impossible, is silly given that DNS servers exist.
Go ahead. Implement it and scale to 1M clients. Post your code here when you're done
This is why I said to stuff the UDP requests into SQS and have the backend read off the queue.

If the requirements are impossible, change the requirements.

Bingo
But how much would it cost each month to implement your solution at a steady load of 1M clients?