Proof We're in a Simulation
I have proof we're all in a simulation.
Actual, real, factual proof.
Butter.
Think about it.
If your house is too cold, or warm, it's borked. It doesn't spread, or it's melted. It's designed to spread at the perfect temp zone for human living, yet it's the by product of milk and a natural process.
Likely the parent simulation has a delicious, similar spread, but it requires a heating bowl, or a cooling bowl to be able to use it at room temp. Butter is a pleasant design, a fantasy for those playing, controlling, and watching our simulated world.
It's proof! This is a simulation!!!
19 comments
[ 2.4 ms ] story [ 44.9 ms ] threadNo. It's proof that the entire universe was designed to ensure that butter spreads at the same temperature that humans find comfortable. Even the fact that human comfort == butter comfort is a big, hairy flag.
Butter is butter because if butter wasn't butter, the universe would not exist as it is! It's the cotter-pin of our reality, it's the centre that holds, it's the validation of an if-then statement, it's an automated test.
I bet if butter isn't perfect at room temp, the next version doesn't ship!
Butter has propeties like everything else. Those properties across a range of temps has an appeal. Ice cream... Same thing. Ice cubes, same thing.
And so on.
That is because butter is fatty, and like lard, it will coagulate and spread smoothly at room temperature. It's not simulation theory, it's basic gastronomy.
The struggle with Hacker News is that people regularly ask dumber questions than this during more sober news hours, so it's impossible for any of us to know if you're being serious.
This universe is designed that way. Designed so butter spreads.
That's not a mistake. It's baked in.
There are other fats that are liquids at freezing temperatures and solid as a brick at 1000c. It shouldn't really surprise you that animal fats are optimized for the average living conditions of a warm-blooded mammal. Any other mutation simply would have died off during evolution.
Embrace the truth, don't shy away. Take that stick of butter and revel in its incredible happenstance, its wonderful mystery, and know that such universally derived splendour is not to be waved away.
Take that butter, spread it. Feel the joy in is flavour and taste. Know that this only happens, that your toast and bread only survives unscathed in a universe where butter temp and human temp are a conjoined state of blissful commonality.
Move that metric a little off, and your morning is torn asunder, your toast made into shreds of its former dignity, by the might of your hard, cold, angry butter.
It's not a mistake, it's planned. Quintillions likely watch us all walk around, spreading butter every morning.
Congratulations on discovering the anthropic principle, then turning it into a horrifyingly myopic and solipsistic vision where the universe has been made to fit you rather than you having evolved to fit it.
If we were in a simulation and that simulation had an intelligent designer that was intending to improve on things, would your fingers be able to be inserted into both your asshole and your mouth? If the fecal-oral route exists you’re not in a simulation for humans, you’re in a simulation for bacteria, which in turn is a simulation for viruses, which in turn is a simulation for entropy, which then is ultimately just a non-pseudo RNG.
You've not explained butter, instead you've merely described distractive choke-points in validation of my theory, placed there by designers of our simulation.
Why do you think we eat butter in the morning, at breakfast? It's because we're not awake enough to realise the wonder of butter, a joke by some developer in the real world.
I believe there is an array of fixed size attached to the local spacetime cell which keeps a list of weird/uncommon words. This is why we often see the same uncommon word multiple times in close proximity across otherwise-unrelated contexts.
Example: The other day I saw the word "rackset" on a piece of equipment at work. Later that day I saw the same word on a completely unrelated thing. That's not a word I've ever seen before. And now all of the sudden it's getting used in multiple places. It's so immersion-breaking.