My wife and I had a good chuckle at these. The one we both remember is the one about Penguin losing his lollipop and buying a Milky Way.
However, we both agreed that when comparing the UK(ish) and US(ish) variants, the UK ones are much more fun and colourful: The US ones seem a little, erm, boring!
Tom Scott did a video in 2020 on the exact same subject and premise[0], and it's super interesting. I'd recommend it to anybody who enjoyed this article, honestly.
Thank you for remembering and sharing this - I knew I'd seen it before, I just couldn't recall where. Mr Scott is and was (and maybe will be?) the obligatory xkcd of nerd experiments.
I saw something similar on Reddit r/FoundPaper where a parody of twinkle twinkle little star had a hilarious divergence at the end. Not all mutations have reproductive fitness but it is fascinating to see in the wild.
fwiw, from North East Fife (Scotland), it has been ('89/'90) "the Batmobile lost a wheel, and landed in the Tay", the Tay being the big volume river between Fife (the Scottie dog shaped bit on the East) n Dundee/Tayside (with the Tay having come via Perth etc)
Never heard that round there. I wouldn't count Dundee as "north east Scotland" either. Angus maybe. That's where they begin to sound like north easterners.
Huh, my childhood version was almost the standard US one, but the ending was “and Alfred saved the day”, not shown in the article’s diagram. This would have been learned in the Midwest US (St. Louis vicinity), late 1960s.
There's also corrupted versions in other languages than English! I'm from Portugal and there's also semi-bawdy lyrics that somehow spread across the country organically across hundreds of miles.
"Jingle bells, Batman smells, Robin laid an egg. The Batmobile lost its wheel and the Joker ran away." is the version I heard as a kid in the American midwest. It's fascinating to me that this rhyme was international at a time in my life before I'd ever heard about the internet.
Edit: Oh, it's simple. This is the version broadcast on The Simpsons TV show in 1989 and I must have heard it second-hand from my fellow students who were allowed to watch the Simpsons.
Growing up, the lyrics always included the verse as well as the chorus: “… and the joker got away! // Batman in the kitchen // Robin in the hall // Joker in the bathroom // peeing on the wall. // …” but I can’t remember how it ended. does anyone else remember this?
We usually ended it there, but I vaguely recall a version where Batman slips on it (the pee) and breaks his balls; I don't recall the actual verse though.
I seem to remember hearing the standard US one in the bit at the end of The Cosby Show, which was on free to air TV soon after getting home from school.
Tangent - Monktoberfest 2016: Bryan Cantrill - Oral Tradition in Software Engineering https://youtu.be/4PaWFYm0kEw?si=avSAlBsCVUzjW2xo&t=163 (only 2:43 in ... so after the relevant clip, start over and you'll catch back up quickly)
> so let's just do a little experiment here ... um ... so if I say Jingle Bells Batman Smells you say ...
> okay where did you learn that? If that's not a movie reference; it's not not from a TV show; you learn that the way I learned that you learned that - on the playground. You learned that from another eight-year-old another seven-year-old ...
Advanced version from early 2000s (US), incorporating several additional lyrical-flow improvements on phrases seen in the Tom Scott video and TFA:
"Dashing through the snow - - on a pair of broken skis - - -"
"Down the hills we go - - - Crashing into trees!"
"The snow is turning red - - I think I'm almost dead - -"
"And now I'm in the hospital with stitches in my head! Oh, -"
"Jingle bells, Batman smells, Robin laid an egg! - - -"
"Batmobile lost a wheel and the Joker played ballet! HEY!"
"Jingle bells, Batman smells, Granny got a gun, - - -"
"? ? ?, and shot a man in 1931! HEY!!!"
All I can think of reading this is how many versions - and how enriched with genius local detail - of the Illiad, Gilgamesh, etc there must have been when they were strictly oral traditions
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[ 2.4 ms ] story [ 50.7 ms ] threadHowever, we both agreed that when comparing the UK(ish) and US(ish) variants, the UK ones are much more fun and colourful: The US ones seem a little, erm, boring!
[0] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V5u9JSnAAU4 - Tom Scott, 'I Asked 64,182 People About “Jingle Bells, Batman Smells”. Here's What I Found Out.'
https://www.reddit.com/r/FoundPaper/comments/1p7bvtz/found_n...
All boiling in a pot
A load of soot came tumbling down
and spoiled the blinking lot
Alternative. The Angel of the Lord came down and eat the blinking lot.
Definitely British. Evidenced by the term 'kidney bean'
Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer *(reindeer)*
Had a very shiny nose *(like a light bulb)*
And if you ever saw it *(saw it)*
You would even say it glows *(like a light bulb)*
All of the other reindeer *(reindeer)*
Used to laugh and call him names *(like Pinochio)*
They never let poor Rudolph *(Rudolph)*
Play in any reindeer games *(like Monopoly)*
Then one foggy Christmas Eve Santa came to say *(Ho Ho Ho)*
Rudolph with your nose so bright Won't you guide my sleigh tonight? Then all the reindeer loved him *(loved him)*
And they shouted out with glee *(yippee)*
"Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer *(reindeer)*
You'll go down in history!" *(Like George Washington!")*
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Tay_Bridge_Disaster
Hopefully I'll get to see it sometime.
Don't ask, it's not original with me.
Edit: Oh, it's simple. This is the version broadcast on The Simpsons TV show in 1989 and I must have heard it second-hand from my fellow students who were allowed to watch the Simpsons.
RIGGING UP THE LIGHTS!!
Yo-ho, sending Christmas cards.
The damn lightS!!!
Facing my in laws!
One light goes out, they all go out!!!!!!!
FiiiiiIIIIIIiiiive months of bills!!
She's a witch, I hate her.
You're so smart, YOU rig up the lights!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aMxgttJpbZE
Robin flew away
Mr silly bit his willy on the M1 motorway.
I seem to remember hearing the standard US one in the bit at the end of The Cosby Show, which was on free to air TV soon after getting home from school.
> so let's just do a little experiment here ... um ... so if I say Jingle Bells Batman Smells you say ...
> okay where did you learn that? If that's not a movie reference; it's not not from a TV show; you learn that the way I learned that you learned that - on the playground. You learned that from another eight-year-old another seven-year-old ...
https://youtu.be/DpV9f4Tv8kA?feature=shared
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells why won’t they shut up
Being chased by werewolves, ain’t this just my luck
Dashing through the gloom
In a one-horse open cart
Trying to escape the doom
Where Werewolves eat my heart
You had to read the tome
And utter the mad curse
Now if we get home
I’m sure it’s in a hearse
Ohhhh…
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells why won’t they shut up
Being chased by werewolves, ain’t this just my luck
"Jingle Bells, Batman smells, Robin flew away, Wonder Woman lost her boobs - flying TAA."
Context note : TAA or Trans Australia Airlines was a major Australian domestic airline of the time, later merged into Qantas.
(aka "The Munchkin's Theme" ) (to the tune of "Jingle Bells")
Slashing through the Orcs
With a good two-handed blade
Over corpses we go
And through the gore we wade
Mace on helmet rings
Making bodies fly
What fun to sing our Slaying Song
And watch these suckers DIE!
https://hack.org/~mc/writings/hackerdom/ring-their-bells.tex...
It's obviously rhyming with the original song, which has "all the way" and "sleigh".
I.e. you need at least the final "ay" in order to properly evoke that phonetic aspect of the original.