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Beautiful. Love the weirdness of it.
Here is my take on the subject, in my case I was more curious what a shared public postgres server would feel like.

https://www.public.outband.net

It's a bit rough and lives on an old router in my closet so be gentle.

(comment deleted)
Hey, this is the author of SQLnet. Feel free to ask me anything about this project.
Neat! Missed opportunity to name it “SQLer” (squealer) though.
I suggest updating the login form's "query" to:

  SELECT token, user_id FROM users
  WHERE username = '____'
  AND password = HASH('____')
  -- Or maybe: AND password_verify(password, '____')
  LIMIT 1;
I assume you are already hashing passwords, but the current login form's 'UI query' is enough to raise questions
Back online. Proudly hosted on Raspberry PI, lol
Name sounded familiar. Read the post, loved the weirdness of it. Then, flashback. Oracle sqlnet! The original distributed processing framework of the greybeards and Oak Table knights. Anyone remember Oak Table?
Lol, I didn't know about Oracle sqlnet at that moment