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bah humbug. In the age of LLM edited text, having a distinct style (be it written or spoken) is a breath of fresh air. AI has already ruined the em dash, no need to let it ruin your unique voice, style and cadence.
> people appeal to the internet, terrified they’re hindering their careers by striking the wrong balance; they seek advice from job coaches ...

They do? It seems strange to me people are terrified about this and they need coaching about how many periods or commas to put around their "lol"s and "heh"s. If this is what terrifies and scares us, we are paradoxically both doomed, and at the same time doing pretty well, given what the top item on the agenda look like.

What is this article talking about? Nobody is afraid of using periods.
Use exclamation marks sparingly. Use hyperbole sparingly. Use cussing rarely. Use emoji rarely. Use parallelism sparingly. Use antibiotics rarely. All for the same reason.
> Use emoji rarely.

You misspelled "never".

The only time I do it is in replies to my wife, who thinks emoji are the funniest things she has ever encountered in her life.