36yo: Career at home vs. Simple life abroad?

These kinds of multivariate decisions are extremely hard and what decision support systems were designed to work with. Typically you construct a model with all the qualitative questions, and a process which weighs each of them against each other drives something like a weighted centroid outcome.

The problem with asking strangers is the lack of investment and consequences to decisions. So if I say Portugal it has zero context to how your emotions will cope with e.g. sudden deterioration of your parents health, or racism, or language issues. If I say turkey it's based on outsider sense of place as a visitor with no exposure to the political risk.

Decision support is part of operations research. A good oversight (obviously they push their own model but they explain a lot of the systems)

https://www.1000minds.com/decision-making/what-is-mcdm-mcda

for context I made the decision to up sticks and move to another economy in my late 20s almost 4 decades ago and have never regretted it but it does carry bitter pills, breaking of links, parental death and related family tensions, emotional turmoil. Nothing is easy, but my path was easier than yours given the same language both points of my migration journey, and a different world economy

> What would you do? For me the closeness of the family was the deciding factor, so I returned from abroad to my home country

Do you speak Portuguese? Are you interested in learning it? I don't know how big a role it plays in making connections and friends in Portugal, and how important those are to you. It may be also more difficult to find English (or Turkish!) speakers in smaller towns compared to big cities.

How stable is the remote role? Are you more likely to be laid off (or the company to cease operations) than turmoil in Turkey? Obviously this is also very subjective speculation, but since you don't mention it, how does it figure into your plans? How well will you be able to find other similar work in Portugal? (Or elsewhere, I would assume your relocation will offer freedom of employment across EU.)

At 36, the 'simple life abroad' often looks like a dream, but the 'career at home' provides the leverage for future freedom. The middle ground that worked for me was focusing on 'local-first' projects that don't require high-bandwidth office politics. If you can decouple your income from a specific geography while keeping your career growth, you don't have to choose. But remember, a simple life is a state of mind—moving abroad with the same burnout mindset won't solve the core issue.

It's interesting that you frame the question as what is wiser. Here is a quote from Naval about making decisions, I hope it would bring more clarity.

Decisions:

- If you can’t decide, the answer is no.

- If two equally difficult paths, choose the one more painful in the short term (pain avoidance is creating an illusion of equality).

- Choose the path that leaves you more equanimous in the long term.

Also, never outsource decision making to anyone who doesn't bear the consequences of the decision.

It’s wiser to invest in independence of any external circumstances. To get some valuable skill, for example. To be flexible enough to relocate.

Also you don’t go to another country for a “better living standards”.

You go there to get out of your comfort zone, to grind, to prove yourself, to learn etc. unless you’re already rich you’re going to struggle in one way or another for a while. Only your kids born there will be able truly and fully enjoy all the “standards”. That’s the brutal truth.

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I'd suggest staying in Turkey.

I've done the expat/migration thing myself, there are some upsides for sure, but it can also be quite draining being a bit of a social misfit, not having a much of network/connections, dealing with the linguistic/cultural/administrative issues of visas, etc... in many ways you're just forever at a disadvantage to the locals.

I also don't see Portugal as being a big step up from Turkey in the grand scheme of things. Both basically europe, mediterranean, decent standard of living but kind of second-tier economy, etc. If anything, Turkey is obviously bigger, has some bigger cities, more of a range of lifestyles, etc.

I think migration/expat life can be worth it if you're moving to silicon valley, tokyo, new york, shanghai... or somewhere that is a centre of gravity for your industry (like australia for mining, texas for oil, shenzhen for hardware manufacturing, etc...), and the income/growth potential is many multiples of what you can get at home, but I wouldn't be doing it for a modest, largely sideways move.

As for your 10k EUR... obviously, beware the sunk cost fallacy. Also, these things aren't permanent, if you want you can do it for 6 months or a year, see how it is, if it's great, stay, if it's not... go back (or somewhere else).

As other pointed out, it's very difficult to answer as we're not you...

Ideally, I'd try to talk to people who made similar decisions (e.g. Turkish migrating to Portugal or similar) so you can perhaps add new information to your options.

Regarding the financial weight: this money is lost already, so shouldn't be taken into account for the decision.

Living abroad is aways a valuable experience. On the other hand, if you have a low income and little opportunity for growth, this can be a frustrating on the medium term. If you go that path, maybe try to think ahead to see what will be your next step. Suppose you don't like Portugal, could you fall back to your option B after 2 years?

Why don't you ask you AI for its opinion?

I wouldn't do the Portugal option unless you have a path toward it growing in the future. Otherwise you may find yourself at age 46, making 1500 euros a month, and basically unable to actually set yourself up for a life.

Maybe that means getting citizenship in 5-7 years, then moving elsewhere in the EU. Maybe it means something else.

In your situation, I would probably stay in Turkey and build up a career / wealth, with the specific point of picking something that's portable. Not sure if Turkish CPA requirements are portable, or how well they convert to EU/USA/etc. standards. Then in 5-10 years, think about moving to the West, if you still desire to do so.

The money you've invested now is a sunk cost and is irrelevant in the long term.

Health insurance? Remote role taxed where? Would it even count for Portuguese PR?

Spent €10k on visa consultants?.. What did they do exactly?

I wouldn't also fully assume that Portugal is more stable than Turkey. EU is not what it used to be 10 years ago.

...

I would stay in Turkey.

hey man, first of all i empathize with your situation and wish you the best. What i say here is just my opinion, and since I don't know your exact situation this is just me trying to be helpful. if it isn't, feel free to ignore i mean no harm.

May I ask what interests you? And also, what do you see yourself doing in optimal (but realistic - don't give me you want to be Elon Musk or something) outcome?

if you're close with your parents, at your age I think you would probably want to be closer to them. i think being there for them as they get older is way more valuable than simply an economic improvement (unless it is magnitudes better, ofc).

what problems have you faced in your own country? do you have good friends around who might have various skills in similar situation or looking to do something different? maybe a gathering of imaginations and skills could result in something nice that you guys do and start small to keep busy and make money? for example, even offering your services via a consulting firm you form to people in foreign countries (USA, Canada, Euro the currency) could be good. If you get paid in foreign currency you could maybe kick the economic uncertainty bucket down the road.

but, if you do relocate to Europe i think you could look into getting cheap/free education there and improving your conditions. it is never too late to learn and do new things.

good luck bro

I can't answer this for you because it's objectively very subjective, but if I were to give advise it would be to minimise regrets. Which option, if you didn't make it, would you regret more?

I'd also add that "menial" work can be really enjoyable... My favourite job ever was working in retail. On paper it was the most "menial" job I ever had, but it was also by far my favourite. If I could have a good quality of life working a job like that again, I do it in a heartbeat.

Finally, you don't know how things will play out. I had a "good job" early on in my career which I thought I'd never leave because I didn't think I'd find something better. Then I lost my job and within a year my life trajectory had completely changed, and for better. This change in trajectory was largely a direct result of me losing my job. You have no idea what opportunities might await you. If you're a smart person you'll find interesting things to do wherever you are.

for a moment I've read: "simple life aboard" :)

and living aboard would have been a great choice, not in Turkey indeed due to crazy marina costs (not forgetting "Merdogan" how your dictator is called in Italy ;)

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Can you take advantage of the Portuguese educational system to train for a professional career while you are living and working there? If so, I think that might tilt things in favor of Portugal especially if the prospect of obtaining an EU passport is there.

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A different perspective. I'm a first generation immigrant that moved from Russia -> US 30 years ago with my parents.

Some things to consider:

Despite living here for 30 years, my parents don't feel they fit in. Their friends are Russian and the media they consume is in Russian. At the same time, they wouldn't fit in back in Russia either at this point. It's a weird state where you lack a strong cultural association. If you move, highly recommend immersing yourself in local culture, language, and activities.

We moved here because my dad had a good job at an international company (software dev). Our immigrant friends who are doing well are in a similar boat, or have entered higher paying fields like nursing. If you don't plan to climb the financial ladder via upskilling, or aren't in a transferrable career, your material life will be much better in your home country.

Overall, I don't think their quality of life changed much between the two countries. They are educated, white collar workers who would have a similar life anywhere they lived.

I did the "simple life abroad" some years ago. A couple of years in Portugal. Easy very well paid job.

I moved back finished a second degree and am looking into a more stable career in my home country.

Don't sweat the decision. If you want to checkout Portugal. Do it. Spend a year or whatever, and move back to turkey if you didn't like it.