Don't use your phone while you poop (nate.spot)

But then how would I take the photo I need to feed my AI-powered fecal analysis agent?

Not just your phone. Don't read books or magazines or do other things.

Get in, take your dump, be done in max 6mins, get up. Don't strain.

...but then when will I do my Duolingo?

what if i end up daydreamin?

Who read this while in the act?

Literally read this on the toilet. Thanks!

I have an AI agent that poops for me and just reports the results.

Flip side: more sitting on the toilet ensures a more complete emptying and less rushing/straining.

From an evolutionary perspective, this is a super vulnerable moment and are in a state of hyper vigilance.

If you have time to read on the toilet, then (barring any disease or other disfunction) you’re not getting enough fiber.

Sitting on the toilet reading this post gives it a whole different feel.

But there aren’t enough shampoo bottles to read.

If pooping is the only time you spend away from your phone, you're not spending enough time away from your phone.

Meanwhile Greeks .. "what's up buddy"

Obvious, and yet will be ignored

Also, it's nasty. Check out how dirty your phone already is, then add fecal matter to that (you really think when you poop it just lands neatly in the bowl and nothing goes into the air?)

There's also showering. (But I've taken to playing music in the shower with a waterproof boombox. Bluetooth'd from my phone, of course.)

And of course, sleeping. ;)

But there is something to this. Intuitive ideas come to you in the quiet moments.

"Oh! I'm so sorry I must have missed it when you got your PhD in defecation."

Back when we lived without phones, we used to read instruction labels on all and any household cleaning products that were stored in the bathroom.

I bet there too was some obscure newspaper column that advised against that.

Yet, lo and behold, we survived!

On the other hand, it's the only time I have a few minutes to actually check my phone...

This must be GenX version of boomers "you are poor because you buy coffees". I need my phone for work, not because of some addictive distraction.

I do not do meditative "quiet reflection" on shitty toilet, I have nice space for that!

I don't believe in planning when to stare at the wall. I just do it when I feel like it - whenever - sometimes family members are around. Be reasonably spontaneous - you'll calibrate on you're own. Don't be afraid. Breathe, baby!

If you want a third reason, sitting too long gives you piles

Pooping is interesting. Having a toddler reminded me how pooping is this uniquely vulnerable, sensitive time for humans. I think a lot of us use books/phones/etc to distract ourselves from a sensorily intense activity. I'm not saying that's a good or bad thing, just noting it.

I will say that playing my Nintendo DS on the toilet many years ago gave me hemorrhoids that still persist decades later. Don't camp on the toilet.

The bathroom is the modern day phone booth. Its the perfect place to read hacker news’s first page.

lol, great closing line