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He explains his options at the end, so I don't know why he is saying it sucks :) JavaScript is improving but is the bloody vendors that keep lacking it behind. That is why TypeScript is awesome, they are bringing ECMAScript 6 to all browsers in native JavaScript form.
In the title I am referring to JavaScript as it stands today, rather than JavaScript as a work-in-progress. As for TypeScript, I actually overlooked its relationship with ECMAScript, it's very cool indeed. I updated the post a bit.
I don't think that that much analysis is needed. JavaScript is simply a horribly-designed language.

Furthermore, it is inherently impossible to improve it. The only way to improve JavaScript is to throw out everything that's there. At that point, you aren't dealing with JavaScript any longer.

The obvious solution is just to offer Python and/or Lua embedded within the major browsers (even if that doesn't include IE right away). They are both sensibly-designed scripting languages that are essentially free from the problems and stupidity that we see in JavaScript. We might as well use them, and at least leverage some of the code that already exists for them.