My startup failed, and I don't know why (shitfuckpissstore.com)

all you need is one customer....

How much time did you invest in this?

Do you know how to make potato salad?

I actually enjoyed reading the description for pricing plans.

I imagine the reason your business failed is due to ignoring the lefthand side gutter on your website. A simple group focus test would have found this. The text is hard up against the edge of the screen, causing users to feel trapped and confined. With a 15px margin users would feel free and excited by your offering, leading to an improved conversion ratio and additional social back links from sharing on Bebo and MySpace.

UX Consultancy: $3200, payable in Dogecoin.

you should have pivoted to dog underwear... !

color. you forgot about the colored pencils.

Damn you! A loud fart sound in the middle of 10s of people in a conference room. :@ NSFW :D

Never forget the classic sales aphorism to "sell the sizzle, not the steak". Applied to pencils, that would be "sell the sharpening, not the pencil", and can be seen in practice here: http://www.artisanalpencilsharpening.com