Ask HN: How to talk smart?

As for what to look for. Honestly, there are probably some books, but I don't have any recommendations. Instead I'd say, try speaking less, listen more and only say something when you have a point or a reason to speak. And try to be concise and to the point. That is probably 90% of the entire thing you are seeking.

Content - this is similar to what davismwfi said i.e what you're saying actually has to be smart, and directly address the topic very well. Don't beat around the bush, laser focus and say exactly what is required.

Delivery - This is about confidence. Speak slowly, calmly and clearly, keep an upright, open posture and directly look at the other person. Expect that the other person will listen because you have something valuable to say (and the content should match this caliber). Speaking slowly, taking up space with your body, eye contact - all of these things signal assertiveness/confidence.

You can work on delivery all the time, but don't expect to come off like Bond all the time because you have to know exactly what you're talking about, AND the other person has to believe that (very hard in subjective matters unless you've already established a great reputation) to pull that off. I think the delivery should match your confidence about the content - for example, if you sound super confident when you dont know what youre talking about people will eventually peg you as a bullshitter.

Listen very carefully to others. Maybe you will learn something, maybe they just confirm your initial impression. Often people speak to express their mood, not to convey information. Also, when people talk very passionately about their opinions of other people, they are often speaking indirectly about their feelings towards themselves.

Never interrupt. Never contradict, Never insult. These are low-value tactics in a verbal conflict. By not using them, you make it much harder for other people to use on you. If other people interrupt, contradict, or insult you, ignore it. By 'contradict' I mean don't say 'No, that's wrong...' Just say the correct thing and stop. So if someone says 'wheels are square, everybody knows that,' just say 'wheels are round,' and stop talking.

In general, it's a good idea to say as little as possible until the other person runs out of things to say, especially if they're angry.

Repeat what other people have told you. Ask simple questions, ideally with yes/no or very definite answers. It will be much easier to tell if the other person is lying. Also, ask questions that you already know the answer to, in order to get the other person to follow the direction you want in conversation. this is a technique trial lawyers use a lot.

When you use these techniques in an argument, it's like you step out of the way if someone tries to hit you. The other person swings his fist - you move aside. You can lead the person where you want to go by the way you move. They waste their energy expressing anger or saying foolish things. When you speak, you are very careful to say only things you are sure about.

Avoid trying to jump ahead of the conversation to guess what someone really means or what their secret motivation is or anything like that. Often such guesses are wrong, and in any case it often doesn't matter.

Smart people are never afraid to say 'I don't know' or 'I don't understand, please explain' or 'I'm confused about ______.' If you make a habit to be honest about this instead of pretending to understand something you don't, you'll find it's hard to for other people to lie to you.

You should be able to improve by simply slowing down and considering what you want to say before you say it.

This doesn't answer the question, but this video gives great perspective on how one can be perceived depending on his body language: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rk_SMBIW1mg

It's not always about words, body language is very important in making the impression.

There is no trick to become smart talker. Just attain knowledge in the domain you work or want to become "smart talker".

Once you know enough things about the topic you are discussing you thoughts will be clear and concise.

So your question should be: "How do I become an expert in xyz field so that everyone get a good impression when I talk?".

If you feel yourself beginning to ramble or becoming nervous. Simply pause, it might seem counter intuitive, but know that you are not pausing for a long as you think you are. And pausing is always better than 'umming' or 'aaahing'.

Also broaden your vocabulary, the best way is simply to read more books. So that next time when you as 'how to talk smart' you instead say 'how do I speak more cohesively'

    I am intrigued by erudite speakers. This could be Sean Connery portraying
    James Bond, Kevin Spacey in House of Cards, or many others both
    real and fictional, including my current manager. They speak slowly and
    clearly, with carefully chosen words that feel calculated, but they always
    manage to make a lasting impression.

    I'd love to be able to engage my manager in a style of speaking similar to
    his. How can I improve my skills in this area? Are there particular books
    I could read, or podcasts to which I could listen? And, as always, thank
    you in advance for your advice!

    1. Spellcheck.
    2. Read what you write out loud to yourself, and edit anything that doesn't
    feel 'natural.'
    3. Brevity.
    4. Read more.
    5. Write more. 
    6. Try taking public speaking courses. Maybe check
    out your local Toastmasters group:
    http://www.toastmasters.org

Further, it's not always an effect with a reasonable cause. Have a $5 billion exit, for instance, and I will listen in rapt attention to anything you say that's not asinine. Perhaps not if you write it to the public of HN, but in a private conversation? I'd be impressed, flattered, etc., not necessarily because of what was said or how it was said, but because of who said it. There's a reinforcing effect here where the more leeway the listener gives you, the more rhetorical risks you'll feel like you can take.

Which brings me to my next point: be less accurate. This is a habit (good? bad?) that hackers can pick up because we deal with computers that do care about accuracy and don't care about rhetorical effect.

The harder part here is sacrificing your self-image of someone who doesn't bullshit.

[1]http://www.amazon.com/How-Win-Friends-Influence-People/dp/15...

Write.

Write essays, write long blog posts, write 500+ words a day.

Writing helps you learn to clarify, organize, and structure your thoughts. Writing helps you think better.

(And, conversely, read! Read good writers. Read writers who write for the joy of using language. Then work on making your own writing more playful! And, sleep with a thesaurus under your pillow.)

A very good book, with lots of exercises (that you should practice often if you really want to get better) is The Charisma Myth (http://www.amazon.com/Charisma-Myth-Science-Personal-Magneti...).

Good luck in your learning journey!

And actually pay attention.

It's astounding how much people suck at this simple task. Lately I'm beginning to feel like most of my conversations go like this: I'll begin talking with someone about a certain topic (that I clearly thought was important enough to share), and about two sentences into my discourse, the phone in their pocket buzzes. So of course they pull it out and start typing.

I pause.

"Go on, I'm listening," they'll say, waving their hand up at me from their phone. Doubtful, I continue speaking. But then some car outside honks and of course they have to turn around to see what all the commotion was about. Then they notice a cute dog walking by. "Oh! Look at that terrier! My friend has one just like it. I think I might get a dog soon." Then they go back to typing on their phone.

Again, I pause.

Realizing they're not going to prompt me to resume this time, I take the initiative upon myself and continue where I left off. After a few more sentences, I finish making my point and stop talking. And wait.

Then... nothing.

"...sooo?" I inquire.

"Uhh.. so what?" They stare back at me blankly.

"Sooo... what do you think about all that?" (along with an implied "I wouldn't have wasted my breath speaking if I didn't value your input and seek your feedback. Why else would I vocalize in your direction?")

"Um, uhh... I don't know. I guess you're probably right. Oh, by the way, do you want go to [random sports event] this weekend? Me and a few friends are probably going to go, and we can get tickets cheaper if we pay by Tuesday."

I worry that in a few more years I'll just quit speaking altogether.

Perhaps, you too, should speak slowly and clearly. Use adjectives. Add a bit of color and side-story.

Our brains have a speed limit. It's mostly the same for pretty much everybody, but some of us have learned the skill of slowing down the conversation.

If you slow the conversation down, you have more time to think and come up with something witty to say.

So, speak slowly, add adjectives, add color and side-stories, metaphors, I can go on, but you get the picture.

Do not add stupidity like "like", "you know", "uhmmm", etc.

That's your brain freezing up because you're moving too fast and it is trying to compensate by inserting noise to slow down the conversation. Slow down the conversation deliberately and clearly by adding context.