Well, I'm glad to hear that at least your personal situation is good. and I am glad that this has led to a good discussion. It's pretty heartbreaking to hear that a lot of people are unhappy about their similar situations.

To address your comments:

That's why I explicitly uses the word 'contest'. As I mentioned, the fact that this might delay in any way the execution of my will upon my death could cause hardship to my loved ones. This has to do with the way I earn money (as a consultant). My wife who owns a minority stake in our consulting business would need to take over and execute business decisions immediately.

I'm not saying we can't make changes for the better. I'm saying that you don't have control over the circumstances of your birth, or your young life. This however is not a good reason to deprive a charitable donor (in the case of Canada) of their privacy.

Regarding adoption records, anonymity laws were originally put in place to protect young children from being abandoned on doorsteps and to stop infanticide.

As for lax standards, I can't comment on for profit clinics in the US, and I am not sure how much money is made on the clinic's part in Canada, but from what I've looked into as a potential donor in Canada, the standards were very rigorous, and it would be unpaid to the donor at least, as per law and health Canada guidelines.

> No such database exists. We have been advocating for such a database for 20+ years here in Canada. 90% of offspring of heterosexual social parents that are donor conceived do not know they are donor conceived. Are you proposing that someone would submit their DNA to 23andme, but not be able to receive their results back if they were donor conceived? What if they didn't know they were donor conceived, and found out as a result of your policy? Does that sound like a good idea?

I think that would be a reasonable outcome, at least, to protect an anonymous donor's privacy, but I'd also expect parents who used donations to have a conversation about the matter before having a child send off a kit to one of those companies. I think then reaching out to the donor, via the escrow of the fertility clinic, to see if contact would be welcome, would be fair to all parties involved. ReproMed also has a Sibling Registry - which I do have qualms with, namely the cost to register. Something like this should be publicly funded, IMHO, as part of the healthcare system. I think this is a situation that sucks for everyone, to be fair. More on this topic below.

>Do you know all of your third cousins? I think most people do not know all of their 3rd cousins. If you're the rare exception to that, my apologies. >My point is that a hypothetical offspring can easily identify you if there is anyone within 3 generations removed from you that has happened to be on one of these sites. >Rather than prevent offspring (who, again, have no agency here) from using these sites, why not prevent any relative within 3 generations of sperm donors from using 23andme? How about a database of donors, and anyone within 3 generations is not able to have their information listed on 23andme? >Given that donors have agency in this (they are choosing to donate sperm) and offspring do not, that would seem to be a fairer way to accomplish your objectives for privacy.

I do, the ones who are alive at least. Hoping to spend Rosh Hashana with my gran's cousin's family, which includes her grandson, who is indeed my third cousin :). While I'd be ok with this scenario, at that point you have exposed the donors, and you've taken potential agency away from multiple people, rather than the singular potential offspring(s). It's pretty much a loose-loose situation either way.

Either way personally I'd be happier if these sites didn't exist at all, but that's besides the point :).