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One thing I wonder, if IQ would play something in this...
In general, yes. A higher IQ is correlated with handling more complexity.
Working memory is something which some IQ tests aim to evaluate.
if you do multiple things at once you divide your focus over these things, and thus retain less of each. seems reasonably logical??
It's not "while multitasking". It's a stable attribute.
I think i've multitasked my way out of having sufficient functional memory to remember multiple simultaneous tasks.
Multi-tasking it is not but task-switching it is with a heavy penalty for the context switch.

In other words, the sum of the task-switching is much less than focus on a singular task.

I reason I work in fields that require multitaskers is because I have very poor memory. The code I was given to work with is incredibly complicated. Few people can work with it. Not having good explicit memory forces me to organize my own work and detect patterns. I describe my ADHD not as being aware of one thing then another thing, but rather, being aware of all things at the same time. Do they compare memory before multitasking and then after multitasking?
You raise a good point - are people multitasking because they have poor memory, or do they have poor memory because they multitask?
That's exactly in line with what the researchers state: "It’s too early to definitively determine cause and effect."
So, I'm a frequent multitasker, but I generally arrange my tasks by likeness - so I'll do programming, then documentation, then design, then reading, and then perhaps troubleshooting. I guess it's a form of pipelining.

The context switch penalty between like tasks is small, the context switch between dissimilar tasks is enormous and generally will cause me to completely lose state on whatever I was working on, which requires me to rethread the needle, and restart.

Article says it's too early to draw conclusions.

It could well be that your memory gets worse because you rely on technology to remember things for you. And because you know how to do that, you can switch between more tasks.

There are stories about how people used to remember lots of things back when it wasn't so easy to store information. And also stories about tribal people who haven't yet developed literacy being able to remember lots of stuff.

Seems like most managers should fall into reduced memory category. They have to juggle more things during the day (on average) than specialists. A random email, meetings, etc. all contribute to this. I also wonder how smartphone usage worsens memory loss.
I try to avoid leaving a game or Youtube video open when I am "working". When I try to multitask, I get more frustrated. In the long run, the frustration turns into depression. So I try to tackle one task at a time nowadays. The difficult part is ignoring the phone. It is always within my view, if not within my arms reach. Just the sheer sight of my phone seems to take attention away from me. I don't know what to do with it though... I can't take it offline because my family needs to reach me. Perhaps a smartwatch would help?
I totally relate to this; when I am multitasking I start getting irritable and frustrated. I do it a lot because I am trying to be ultra-productive, but I am starting to realize it would be better for my relationships and my work if I just take time to focus on one thing at a time; including the context that when I am not working, I don't think about working.
Thanks for bringing up the term ultra-productive. That's exactly why I began multitasking only to realize it is just far better to work on one thing at a time for the performance and for my happiness. It took me a long time to realize this, but I am glad I figured it out.
Have you tried meditating? If I understand correctly it is supposed to train you to do exactly what you want: to be able to focus intently on one thing and not get distracted.
Funny you should mention meditation. It is something I am trying to incorporate into my life since early this year. Nothing fancy, I just use some guided meditation I find (usually 10 min long) and close my office door and listen to it. Unfortunately, I have yet to experience the full benefit of meditation since I only manage 2 sessions a week. However, when I it properly (ie, I don't get interrupted), I breathe better, my body is relaxed, and the head is clear.
I don't think a smartwatch would help, you'd just change what you're looking at.

What I do if I need to not be distracted: - turn off all essential notifications on phone - put your phone on silent - place phone behind your view to the left or right, upside down

This way if your family needs to reach you, they'll call/message and you'll hear it vibrate and handle it. Otherwise you won't even see it. Just make sure they are only contacting you for real things, and not to say hi, at least when you're trying to concentrate.

Yes, let me do that right now actually. I placed my phone charger underneath my desk, so it is out of my view. It will ring when I get a call. Didn't need a visual cue. One less clutter on my desk!
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I used to have 'buckets' I would stick things into, and they would stay there forever. Context switching was not a problem. Whatever I had put in that bucket was so strongly associated with the context, that when I switched, the bucket would be there waiting for me. I think I basically had built something like a memory palace before I had the concept of a memory palace.

Best way I think I can discribe it... it's almost like in my short term memory rather than trying to cram in every individual variable, I was just including a pointer to a struct containing the variables for those contexts. When I would call up that pointer, I'd get the entire struct and just keep going.

I'm not sure if it's age, alcohol use, stress, always-on internet, genetics, or what, but now I'm lucky if I can remember what task I'm in the middle of if I start thinking about something else while doing it. I find myself just as able to solve problems when I can remember things, but a lot less able to remember things, making me feel a lot stupider and/or slower than I used to be. Context-switching is a real challenge now. FWIW, I used to be A LOT better at tuning out the world/distractions than I am now; I feel like that changed when my kid was born.

That is pretty close to how I think too. I also rarely commit things to memory which are easily referencable, which is annoying.
I like to joke that this is the reason why Google does their silly on-the-spot interviews where they expect people to recall algorithms from memory... They know that the machine they've built erases the need to memorize anything, that people are adapting to it and they want to make sure that if the day ever comes when their whole thing comes crashing down, there's a flying chance in hell that they'll have people on staff who can rebuild a search engine, without a working search engine, before society descends into Idiocracy.
I've been going through exactly the same issue since my kid was born (in my early 30s now). Reading your post was weird.

I wonder if it's worth digging in to our situation more seriously. Is there a specialist we can talk to about this kind of stuff? Are there tests?

The only conclusion I've come to is, putting it simply, we're dealing with: a) more things b) more complicated things. I had less to worry about when I was younger and the problems were comparatively simple. Now I'm getting paid a ton of money to work on very complex systems. This requires juggling more information that's way more complex.

I dunno.

I'm in the same boat for memory. I've never had children though. Early 30s.

Old people might say it's just part of getting old. Perhaps there's something more to it than that. Plaque build-up of some sort, for example, in memory processing?

Shouldn't the title be updated to mention media multitasking?
Have they controlled for sleep? This year I've made so many gains by sleeping well, that everything looks like a sleep problem to me.