Ask HN: Where do you live? What's good or bad about it?

106 points by michaelteter ↗ HN
With each Who's Hiring, we see opportunities from many different cities. But having not lived in some of the cities, it's really difficult to know if we would be happy relocating.

What prompted me to post this "survey" is an interesting opportunity onsite in NYC. But from an outsider's perspective, especially browsing apartments online, it doesn't seem too attractive. I'm sure there's a lot to like, but it would be nice to hear the good and bad from people who live there.

So, please give your city and its pros and cons.

TIA!

323 comments

[ 2.9 ms ] story [ 484 ms ] thread
San Francisco

Pro: The walkable parts are extremely walkable

Con: The unwalkable parts are extremely unwalkable

This is true. It also has a strange combination of being very big in the sense that there are many areas I almost never visit and very small in the sense that you _can_ walk anywhere (but, as you point out, it may be unpleasant, dangerous or both). Personally, I essentially live full time in a few walkable ribbons that maximize the good and minimize the bad.
Unwalkable in terms of hills or sketchiness?

The sketchiness is mostly contained to tenderloin and soma south west of 5th st so fairly easy to avoid

Sketchiness, trash, feces, etc. Surely you don't see any if you live in Pac Heights but near the Tenderloin-Mission district area there's a lot of it.
The entire city is very run-able though (so the Con is a little less so if you're into long distance)
I like San Francisco a lot for biking

Main thing I learned too late is to just build your ability to climb hills (on a bike, or even when walking I suppose) ... that opens up a lot of the city

Twin Peaks and the top of Potrero might out of range even so, but the rest of the city is open

Pros: incredible food, so much to do within a day’s drive, epicenter of tech and jobs a plenty, stable decent weather year round, steep hills that force you into shape, unique interesting people on the streets (not homeless, talking like people singing to themselves or dressed up in costumes)

Cons: expensive, city bureaucracy, rampant nimbyism

I love it. Now I got a family and may move to get some more space / be closer to family. But not an easy decision even after 10 yrs here.

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Vancouver

Pros: most beautiful city I've ever seen, the water and mountains are unbeatable, ski resorts nearby, nice beaches, good asian food, friendly strangers

Cons: some really surprisingly unsafe and uncomfortable parts of the city, everything's expensive, lots of rain, biking feels really unsafe in most parts (some good bike lanes)

lol Vancouver is as safe a city as they come - try basically any large city in the us or in the developing world, you'll appreciate Vancouver.
The east side is like a third world wasteland.
> the us or in the developing world

Exactly, I expect Canada to be more like Australia, NZ, West/Northern Europe, not the US or developing world. And for the most part it is

Vancouver here as well, agreed about pros, I’ll add the best summer weather in a city environment (not humid, warm/hot). You don’t need a car to get around other than going for hikes and mountains either, which is neat.

For cons — would consider it safer than any other “city” in North America once you exclude Hastings/surroundings. Safety issues are more concentrated in one zone compared to Toronto, NYC, SF, Seattle and etc.

I’ll add another con — it gets very routine after a few years. You don’t feel like you’re living a city life compared to… basically any other city. It’s nowhere close to Toronto, NYC, London, Paris, Barcelona, Berlin, Tokyo, Hong Kong and etc.

Isn't it Canada? So cold among cons, no?
No, it’s PNW (think Seattle), mild and rainy(drizzly) winter; dry, sunny and very confortable summer.
Wow that’s not bad. Whenever a recruiter approached for a Canadian position I’ve always thought that would be just winter all year long and it will kill me both physically and emotionally. Guess I should at least see NA once :)

Are there warmer places like Spain and Portugal in USA/CA?

The problem, as you go south, is that places like Dallas are too warm, so even in the winter, it still rarely dips below a high of 14°C during the day.
California is the place in the US most like Spain in climate.
California will be too costly for me. I am a work-life balance person and I don't think I want to get into something where it means employer owns my hind. And a lower salary in California, if at all I have to go by popular understanding, won't be enough to save and live. Because I want to come back, I don't want to settle abroad. Anyway that is too far in the future. Thanks for the tip. Have friends in that state so will definitely visit.
Van is further north than Toronto (seriously, look it up) but gets the same Pacific weather fronts that also keep Seattle relatively warm.

Like, it'll get cold and there will occasionally be real snow, but is mild compared to other Western Canadian cites.

There is a lot of Dark and Bleak, though. Also like Seattle, once summer is over it turns gray and stays that way until April.

I've been there twice, really love Stanley Park and may even consider moving there. But yeah some parts of the city are wtf, I've seen people injecting themselves in broad daylight a few meters away from police officers.

The people living there seem super friendly though. I think I would prefer Vancouver over Toronto.

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Wouldn’t it be more racist to list as a pro?
It's the same level of racism either way.
How so? One is inclusive (too white, not enough diversity which is a thing we implicitly want) and the other is exclusive (too white, thankfully because we don’t want diversity).
Would you go to China and say it's great but too Chinese? Or list too black in an African country. There is great diversity within the white population.
You can argue it's a "good" racism or a "bad" racism if you want, but the amount of racism happening is the same. One is not more or less racist than the other, they are both the same discriminating decision based on race. The only thing that is different is the moral arithmetic of "is there enough, or too much, of race A/B/C in my opinion".
It's true though
Would someone explain why it’s okay on HN to make a remark like “very white” in this way?
No white people were oppressed in the making of this statement.

Though I would like us to move the pendulum back towards being more… open about the faults of different ethnicities, nationalities, and cultures besides the Western one — without being hateful about it.

In the case of the American “white” culture the cons are obviously: boring, gentrifying, lack of culture, lack of risk taking or openness to (real) new experience, lame, orthodox, etc. It’s a real aspect of locales that’s important to take into consideration. Just the same as it is for any other culture: if you’re in a place dominated by it, and you’re not part of the group, you will have a hard time acclimating and fitting in. If you’re not American “white” then you might find Seattle boring or unwelcoming.

Why is there a double standard though? How are your comments not viewed as racist? Should you make the same kind of remarks about the culture and stereotypes of a different ethnicity/race, you almost certainly wouldn't be met with tolerance.
It's the zeitgeist right now, and has been for a while. There are many causes and reinforcers for it, but the mania around it is dying down if it's any consolation.

On a more personal note, I only believe racism to be "racist" when it's coming from a place of hate. Commenting on other ethnicities/cultures/etc. is standard everywhere outside of the primarily English speaking countries. For example, latinos are flaky, jewish people are fussy, eastern europeans are superstitious, african americans are loud, the french are self-important, the japanese are self-effacing, the british have no taste, and american white people are boring.

Whether this comment is met with intolerance is a non-issue for me. Say what you believe, so long as you're civil, and then accept other people will not agree with you.

Agree wholeheartedly. Made a comment in the very same vein and was flagged.
> if you perceive rain as sad (rather than peaceful, like me) it lives up to its rep as dreary as hell

The rain isn't what gets me; it's the monotonous gray skies even when it's not raining.

Las Vegas

Pros: LCOL, great scenery, good food.

Cons: July.

Chicago

Pros: Summers on the lake, on the river, in endless parks, street festivals, rooftops, and courtyards make you wonder why you would ever want to live somewhere else.

Cons: Winters inevitably remind you of the answer to the above question.

Add crime to the list of cons unless you live in the suburbs.
Have you spent much time in Chicago? I've lived here in Lincoln Park and the loop (downtown) and haven't had any issues with crime, unless you count people smoking on the CTA train. Obviously it's not perfect, but conservative media's portrayal of Chicago as a crime-ridden city doesn't match my experience at all.
Yes I have.

> "conservative media's portrayal of Chicago as a crime-ridden city"

Maybe check police crime reports [1] of your city before going after the conservative media. There's gun related violence every week in Chicago and often there are multiple homicides on a single weekend. I understand it's a big city, but it's still a big problem. Lincoln Park is indeed nice and safe and parts of the loop are safe cause they are very touristy with heavy police presence. But there are many neighborhoods that are not that lucky. Also, the public school system in the city has major problems. In one year when I lived there there were 21 kids from the public school system around the city who got murdered in gang related shootings.

[1] https://home.chicagopolice.org/wp-content/uploads/1_PDFsam_C...

* I just picked the city wide report for the last week. 7 murders. last year same period 14 murders. 2023 numbers seem better than 2022 but still. For comparison, my city of about 110K people has 1-2 murders on average per year.

> But there are many neighborhoods that are not that lucky

I think this is probably the most important point. Much of the crime is concentrated in the city's far west and far south sides, where I generally don't go. These stats are old, but the map is roughly correct and shows the disparity I'm talking about:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crime_in_Chicago#/media/File:2...

The effect is that most of the city is safe, but people on the far south side are impacted by crime. Not to defend the situation—I of course wish that all of Chicago was safe and want to see our city make progress on that. Just trying to provide nuance.

I love Chicago. One of my favorite cities in the entire US.

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... in the summer. After about the end of September, until about the middle of April, you can keep it. I just can't do those winters. I spent a big chunk of winter in, aaah, 2014, 2015 (one or the other) in Naperville just west of Chicago and it was brutal.[1] :-(

[1]: But still not as bad as the Twin Cities, Minnesota area. Edina, MN is not a place you want to be at in the winter, IMO.

Edina= “every day I need attention”, if I recall from growing up near there.

I disagree though. MN is colder but less windy so you get those crisp calm, blue sky winter days in Jan-Feb that make the winter more survivable. But you gotta be ok with the cold.

That all said, I’m now in central Indiana and prefer the milder climate (than both those places!).

What's so bad about winters? You don't drive in chicago unless you want to, so just the walks? Can't you hunker down and get everything delivered to reduce outdoor time? I assume building heating is not an issue.
flat city on a big lake = lots of lake effect snow and wind. they don't call it "the windy city" for nothin...

public transit isn't bad but also isn't great and can be rough at times. also necessitates walking in said bad weather.

> Can't you hunker down and get everything delivered to reduce outdoor time?

COVIDs over bro. what's the point of living in a city if you're hunkered? move to a far flung burb and become a hermit.

> move to a far flung burb and become a hermit.

Hard to get a variety of delivery options there or great internet! :)

My favorite part of chicago is all the outdoor park space. It's mostly useless to me in the winter.
Honestly, I wish Chicago winters were _colder_. My big problem with the winter isn’t the cold, it’s the wet & grey.

If it were colder there would be more sun and snow instead of grey and slush.

Also, pros: world-class architecture, fun music scene, great museums and of course The Art Institute, top universities and everything that comes with that, great restaurants from every cuisine under the sun, very immigrant-friendly city, lovely tree-lined streets with block parties, I could go on and on. Oh, and living is affordable and people are Midwest Nice.

Cons: it's the great flatness - you have to drive for hours to see hills. Tech industry is ok but very b2b and fintech focused and not a lot of consumer or entertainment stuff. Also as a very liberal city it's a favorite target of culture warrior types.

Tie: winter. Yeah, it gets cold and snowy. But also, it's "just weather". It's the same every year and people deal with it pretty easily.

> world-class architecture

I've only visited Chicago once. It was nice, but I'd never thought architecture would be a selling point. Do you have examples of where I should look, the next time I'm there?

River boat architecture tour is commonly called the best tourist attraction in the city.
As a life long Chicagoan I really think you're underselling how bad the winter is. Combined with the flatness it means that most people just don't spend any time at all outside december-april. I think this is why Chicago has such a strong drinking culture, there's just not much else to do in the winter, certainly not 5 months worth of stuff.
As a former Chicagoan, I love Chicago. If you visit r/chicago, there's a lot of love for Chicago among current and former Chicagoans.
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Las Vegas

Pros: Cheap relative to other US cities (especially California). Close to lots of beautiful nature (red rock, charleston, valley of fire, mojave, zion, death valley, joshua tree, eastern sierra). Airport has cheap direct flights to lots of places for the size of the city. Friends/family come to visit a lot. Good food if you can find it hidden away in the strip malls.

Cons: Arguably not a city, just the absolute worst suburban sprawl you can imagine. Cookie cutter homes, huge stroads everywhere. Need a car to go anywhere, walking or biking sucks. The summer, obviously. The population is very transient (at least in my experience, but most of my friends are climbers/other outdoors people which might bias things)

Lived there three years during COVID after rejecting LA (where I grew up) because of ridiculous cost of living, crime, traffic, etc. Vegas has problems but overall not a bad place to live.

Pros: Cheap compared to other cities. No state income tax. Good airport and air connections. Lots of deals for locals if you bother to figure out the rules (so can be cheap to eat out). Plenty of good food.

Cons: Blazing hot or freezing cold desert climate. Terrible public transportation, too hot or cold (for me) to bicycle, too spread out (and hot/cold) to walk anywhere. Lots of weirdos, drunks, pathological gamblers, scammers. Maybe some of the worst and most dangerous driving I've ever witnessed outside of SE Asia.

I'm into magic, so the biggest pro in Vegas for me would be that it's the magic capital of the world.
Technically, it’s actually Colon, MI!

I found this out recently and couldn’t believe it was true.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Colon,_Michigan

Arguably Vegas is the true capital

Haha I had no idea what I was going to find in that link but yeah, you're right, that is technically the magic capital :)
Indianapolis

Pros: easy to get around town, great airport, lots to do, and very very affordable.

Cons: Not pedestrian friendly. Sprawl.

Some neighborhoods are pedestrian friendly but yes generally not. Biking ain’t great but downtown is making progress.

I’ll just add mine here:

Pros: decent chef-driven dining scene, active downtown due to sports and conferences, affordable, small enough to not feel like a major metro but big enough to have stuff to see/do, not a far drive to country areas to get out of town. As someone who grew up in a small town but then have lived in major metros since, I’m most comfortable in Indy.

Cons: distance to mountains (7 hr to Smokies) or oceans (13 hr to outer banks), relatively tame and limited local hiking options, potholes in spring, limited tech options (Eli Lilly, Salesforce, Rolls Royce, Cummins, Roche, Beckman, Corteva, Hospitals, … maybe a few others I'm forgetting).

> limited tech options (Eli Lilly, Salesforce, Rolls Royce, Cummins, Roche, Beckman, Corteva, Hospitals, … maybe a few others I'm forgetting)

Aside Salesforce, these are just big companies. The startup scene here is pretty good (I run one), and there are many other tech companies (Genesys, 1st Internet Bank, Jobvite - techpoint.org is the tech industry trade group here) that have a significant presence here. It's not SV, but if you are a developer, you can do alright here.

NYC!

Pros: Limitless number of things to do, people to meet, communities to be a part of. And Broadway (for me). I also enjoy not needing a car.

Cons: Yes it's expensive. Apartments are a choice between: good location, good size, good price (choose two). More shit seems to be going down in the subway (sometimes the literal kind).

Also, there's a kind of art to apartment hunting in NYC. Once you master it, finding an apartment isn't that bad. I've always gotten a pretty good deal and always had a choice between a few apartments. Staying away from trendier neighborhoods is my first rule (way overpriced.. and this is what most ppl see first before digging deeper). I guess the second rule is know thyself - knowing what annoyances you can tolerate will help you find the types of housing that'll conceivably work for you.

The last sentence is extremely true and good advice.

In general, "the market" is extremely efficient: all "bona fide good" (i.e. you, your mother, your 5 closest friends, your manager, your college roommate would unanimously agree that it's "good") living situations are really expensive.

To find situations that are affordable, you have to trade off on a couple of those bona fides (dishwasher, W/D access, square footage, daytime/nighttime noise, distance from trendy neighborhoods... ambient incidence rate of violent crime).

All that being said, if I were new to the city and under 30, I wouldn't discount bunking up with randos in LES/East Village/Nolita (trendier neighborhoods) for the first year. You're not going to know which neighborhood is your neighborhood until you've seen what's around, and you might as well enjoy the first year. Will you be financially responsible? Eventually. For now, have a good time.

The last part to the NYC apartment hunt: be ready to execute. Sometimes being the first party to engage on the spot is what it takes.

Reminds me of the chapter on Optimal Stopping in the book Algorithms To Live By.

Last time I looked I had a check ready to sign and fill with the proper info.

Totally. I get bank statements, paychecks and living history ready when I go into apartment hunting mode. I transfer around $4-5K to my checking account to be ready to get a bank check in a 24-hr turnaround period.

Optimal Stopping alone makes Algorithms to Live By worth the read

Agreed. Great book. Glad you enjoyed it.
> Also, there's a kind of art to apartment hunting in NYC. Once you master it, finding an apartment isn't that bad.

Please elaborate beyond avoiding trendier neighborhoods.

> Staying away from trendier neighborhoods is my first rule (way overpriced.. and this is what most ppl see first before digging deeper)

Where have you looked?

Some places I've looked in the past: Crown Heights & Prospect Heights, Flatbush-Ditmars, Prospect-Leffert, Astoria, Sunnyside, Financial District, Ridgewood, Bushwick, "East Williamsburg", LIC, Harlem, Hell's Kitchen, Lower East side (sometimes, though it's also getting some of the most overpriced apartments in the city for what you get).
Interesting. And where are the trendier neighborhoods you'd avoid?
I'm an armchair urbanist who follows all the channels and forums, including yours. In 2022 I took a year off to travel the world to figure out where to move. My top list ended up being Paris, Lisbon, Miami and Praia, Cabo Verde. Weird list for someone who's into urbanism right? Only Paris and Lisbon fit the bill. And why isn't Amsterdam and others on it?

Thing is as much as I love good urban design, there's more to life than that. Eg, Amsterdam has terrible weather and tbh I find Dutch culture and lifestyle monotonic and boring. Lisbon is diverse and great but salaries too low. Paris is diverse and amazing but too cold and salaries too low. Cabo Verde you need a good remote job to live. Miami has mostly terrible urban planning but is diverse, fun, gives access to good USD high paying jobs and has nuggets of gold which if you chose your neighborhoods, activities and lifestyle wisely can be much, much more livable than it looks. So I ended up in Miami.

I live car-free in Little Havana, walking distance to both Brickell and Ocho. Plenty of restaurants, supermarkets, pharmacies and every imaginable service within walking distance. I ride my electric bike to South Beach, Little Haiti etc in ~20 minutes. (Wynwood and Overtown in like five ten lol) (that's faster than driving, esp in case of traffic or even just if you include parking) I can take the TriRail and Brightline to Ft Lauderdale and beyond. I can even ride the Amtrak all the way up the East Coast. Not living in Kendall or Hialeah, and not having to drive everywhere, I'm simply not as affected by the bad aspects of Miami's terrible urban planning as most people fuming in traffic on I-95 on the daily are.

Don't get me wrong, Miami gets a solid F in so many ways when it comes to urbanism, so I don't want to plug it too hard. But yeah def not just doable but outright enjoyable if you make the right choices.

Ah another fellow Miami resident. Moved here in 2018 and for the most part I don't regret it.

I agree with most of your sentiment, Miami (really all of Florida) has awful urban design up there with Texas and other "Modern" metropolis in the US and i95 is a bane on this earth. However if you are Latin there really isn't another place with as much variety and cultural presence like South Florida. I have met Colombians, Argentinians, Venezuelans, Cubans, and Nicaraguan all with prominent communities doted across the city and that isn't even including all the Caribbean ones like Jamaica, Puerto Rico, DR, Haiti, and the Bahamas.

I love the beaches and had a more pleasant time in the Hollywood and Hallandale areas that in LA / SF throughout the year. The food scene is amazing and there are plenty of places for entertainment like concerts, sports, theater, and even drag brunches. And look I get that it's overrated but Disney is really impressive but for adults without kids i highly recommend Universal Studios which IMO blew Disney out of the water with both Harry Potter and a more enjoyable selection of rides in general.

My biggest complaints are that a lot of people I meet are "Short-term" transplants and very few people consider the area an option for residency which is a shame when trying to make friends especially now since I am pretty much committed. I also very much dislike how flat and uninteresting the landscapes are especially when driving up to Orlando where the most interesting landmark is a bridge or cows on the side; I miss seeing mountains or rolling hills at the very least. Also despite having a very lively culture scene in general the museums leave a lot to be desired; there are a few hidden gems like the Dali Museum in Tampa (Largest collection of his works outside of Europe) and the Vizcaya (Great Gatsby-like massive mansion built by one of the richest men in the US during the 20s). Also local / state politics could put a lot of people off, especially considering the strong presence of the MAGA crowd.

São Paulo

Pros: it's the business and tech city in South America, lots and lots of immigrants and their delicious restaurants, basically all shows and band tours in South America pass through here. Good internet and infrastructure. Good doctors and healthcare. Cheapest place to travel abroad from Brazil.

Cons: it is not very safe[1]; not much nature like Rio.

[1] safe is a relative standard, I never suffered any kind of theft or robbery living here for 10+ years.

I'd love to move to Brasil but I'm too scared
Houston

pros: INCREDIBLE food and beer scene, lots of events, surprisingly great museums, really great zoo, symphony is top notch, friendly people, surprisingly cheap, very high cultural and political diversity, good parks system, did I mention the food?

Cons: swampy, brutal summers, public transit (it exists but won't get you anywhere you want to go), suburban sprawl for miles and miles, parks aren't picturesque, Houston is to oil and gas what the bay is to tech

Houston is okay to live in. I lived there for 30+ years and while you're not wrong about your pros and cons, those cons severely outweighed the pros more often than not for me. For instance, the zoo is great, when the heat isn't trying to kill you. The sprawl can be a real pain, especially if you're heading from one corner to the other (Kingwood to Sugar Land / Katy is just not enjoyable at all).

Add in the current politics in Texas and yeah, I'm glad I'm not in Houston these days.

Southern California.

Pros: mountain biking.

Cons: Drains all your money, then squanders it through corruption, laziness, incompetence.

Portland, OR

Pros:

• Best city for running in the US

• Relatively cheap still - I pay $1200/month for a 1-bedroom

• Easy to get around without a car if you bike

Cons:

• Tons of restaurants and local businesses shutting down

• Increase in property crime as a result of drugs

• Average summer is going from a few days of 90+ to a week of days pushing 100 degrees with hardly any overnight cooling

What I love most about Portland OR isn't so much the city itself, but the surroundings. The area up in the Columbia River Gorge and what-not... beautiful scenery, great trails and outdoor areas. Waterfalls, etc. I just love that area.
Yeah the Coast Range, Gorge, and Mt. Hood trails are incredible but I really love being able to jog 3 miles to a trailhead that connects 100+ miles of really nice trails right from my front door.
I was born in Portland but haven't lived there since I was 2. But the times I visited I really thought the downtown area and food scene were way better than Seattle's (and definitely cheaper, and they have a MUJI!), at least before the pandemic. Better public transit, and PDX seems more sane than SEA.

A pity about the summers though.

I love the International District in Seattle but otherwise it’s too spread out a city for me. I found a deal for a tiny $450/month studio there in 2010 and almost moved. I was living in Portland’s Old Town/Chinatown area at the time and it just wasn’t the same, although the Chinese Garden is very nice.
San Diego.

Pros: Weather, activities. People are chill and the Mexican food is dank.

Cons: Spensie and the wages aren't great; prefer to work remote for that Bay Area $

Austin, TX

Pros: cheap cost of living for a tech city, warm most of the year, BBQ and live music

Cons: it's hellishly hot for 2-3 months, it's expensive compared to other (non-tech) cities, politically liberal folks will find state politics oppressive

I wrote a much more in-depth analysis of the best city for techies in 2024. TLDR, I think Seattle is probably the best place overall. The Bay is still king if you want to maximize for career growth, though: https://overthinkingmoney.com/2023/11/21/best-city-for-techi...

I live in a residential part of Northern Brooklyn.

Pros: Mostly quiet, good food, cheap, I have a backyard, I know my neighbors. Manhattan is ~25-30 minutes by subway, my friends are ~10 minutes by bike, the good bar/nightclub area is ~15-25 minutes by foot.

Cons: I'm dependent on one okay subway line and one pretty bad one, and I'm a 10-12 minute walk from either in opposite directions. My landlord doesn't like to fix things. People like to ignore driving laws in my neighborhood and paper plates are common (by far the most common crimes, by several orders of magnitude).

I've lived in NYC my whole life, and I'm happy to share any experiences you might find helpful. My email's in my profile!

Edit: My subway lines are okay/bad in terms of reliability, not crime or cleanliness. They're average on the latter.

how cheap is "cheap"? I've never heard anyone say that about brooklyn.
Cheap to me is under 2K, which my rental is (by a decent margin).

Brooklyn can be expensive, but it doesn’t have to be. Avoiding internationally/media famous neighborhoods helps.

Chapel Hill, NC.

Pros: mild winters, reasonably pleasant weather year round (although the summers here are a bit hot for some folks' tastes). Lots of good college sports action, reasonably good night-life. Educated people, cool coffee shops and cafes, decent food scene locally. Lots of tech jobs in the greater Triangle area. Plenty of outdoor green spaces, mountain bike trails, running trails, places to fish.

Cons: "good night life" is relative to where I grew up which is completely in the sticks. Chapel Hill has a lot compared to that scene, but can't compare to the really major cities like Chicago, San Fran etc. The same could be said in terms of food, and many other factors. OTOH, the cost of living tends to be less here, so it's a tradeoff to weigh. There are plenty of tech jobs, but locally there is nowhere near the same access to venture capital funding, which can be problematic if you're wanting to go the startup route. In regards to public transit, at least in Chapel Hill proper the buses are free, which is kinda nice. But unfortunately when you look at the Triangle region as a whole, the public transit scene here pretty much sucks. The live music scene here is OK, but we don't have a truly metal oriented club (that I know of) since the old Volume 11 / The Maywood folded. Walnut Creek is a nice outdoor amphitheater venue and gets some nice shows, but still, a lot of major tours bypass our area in favor of Charlotte or whatever.

On balance though, I'm pretty happy in Chapel Hill. I think this a really nice balance of many factors, and I don't feel any particular urge to leave. Although I'm not saying I never would under the right circumstances.

NYC (Brooklyn, mainly) for north of 10 years.

Pros: Amazing food, music, "culture" in general. In general, if you enjoy some cultural niche, it is probably most at bloom in the U.S. inside the doors of some random address within the NYC boroughs. Compared to many cities, it's relatively easy to make new friends. In most neighborhoods, you can be born, go to school, play, eat every meal, go grocery shopping, get married, get divorced, spin out, find yourself, etc. in a walkable or at worst bikable distance.

Cons: wickedly expensive. You can trade-off some things to make it more affordable, but you have to get creative. It helps to know a local. If you want consistent access to real nature, you realistically need a car. Owning a car in NYC (usually) sucks.

I sum it up as a three-legged stool. It's a great place to have few-to-no responsibilities, be youthful (at heart, at least), and very gainfully employed. If you're short one of those three things, it becomes a shaky proposition. I've wanted to leave at one point or another for at least half the time I've been here, I'll probably still be here in 10 years.

Pro-tip: City Island and Pelham Bay Park are very nice in summer, and get you somewhat close to nature with just a subway and bus ride.

Similarly, LIRR/MNRR run to quite a few nice hiking or otherwise outdoorsy areas. They're obviously not as flexible as a car, but I've had consistently good experiences taking MNRR to e.g. the Bear Mountain area for day hikes.

Lived in BK for 15 years. This summary rings true. The thing that lit my leaving fuse was the noise. Once it started getting to me my clock was ticking. Also the moving. I moved 12 times in my 15 years and each time it ate up 6+ weeks and thousands of dollars. Few moves were voluntary. After a while I simply could not even any longer
> You can trade-off some things to make it more affordable, but you have to get creative. It helps to know a local.

What do you mean?

I said more in a cousin comment: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=38526658

Basically, trade-offs.

On knowing a local, locals will know which neighborhoods align with your lifestyle. They'll also be able to share helpful details about which brokers to work with / avoid, and how to time the markets.

Basically, any apartment you see on zillow/streeteasy (they're the same company) that's been listed for more than 1 week in a desirable neighborhood is either not "bona fide good" or incredibly overpriced, which could (incorrectly) lead you to believe that no good rental options exist in NYC.

The reality is that all the bona fide goods are snapped up within 48 hours. The best ones are practically snapped up before they're even listed. Unless you've lived in NYC for a while and tried to play the housing game, this reality isn't super discoverable.

> The best ones are practically snapped up before they're even listed.

How is that possible?

The landlord's broker will show prospective tenants before the apartment's listed (and before the prior tenant has moved out, if they get the prior tenant's permission).

If a prospective tenant is seriously interested, you can have all the paperwork submitted before the apartment appears on Zillow. We got our last apartment this way. I think the apartment was vacant for less than 7 days.

It tilts the market in favor of people who are willing + able to pay a broker fee. Personally, I'd rather there be no brokers (it'd make the market more fair) but the game is what it is.

Munster, Indiana, a Chicago suburb. We're the food court of the region. Not terribly far from Chicago but not a ton of things to do locally.

Pro: way cheaper taxes than Illinois and Chicago

It's a red state, we have constitutional carry, so crime is far lower than Chicago

Con: it's a Red State, with all the hazards for women that entails.

Chicago Winters

Vancouver

Pros: No need to have a car (pretty great transit system), I can't leave the house without running into someone I know as at least a friend, great coffee, super easy access to international travel and nature. People who are at the peak of competitive athletics, particularly outdoor athletics, also tend to gravitate here, and that's a unique circle to be adjacent to.

Cons: Outrageously, comically expensive, for pretty much everything, especially a place to live, and there's fuck all for jobs atm. I'd also argue that the city lacks any kind of particular cultural expression except bland richness and being filled with fit attractive people. We have concentrations of some ethnic groups that bring some interesting visual architectural flavor in specific areas, but the city stands in for arbitrary big American cities in plenty of movies. Maybe that's it, film people is our thing.

I have no plans to leave; though I'm sure I could find some footing elsewhere, it would take a rather unique opportunity to throw away my sense of community where I live. I still enjoy traveling internationally to see what other places are like.

Also con: the weather in the winter is miserable for 4-5 months straight. It's turned me into a sun worshipper and as soon as I can get out I will.
It's pretty sunny here right now. I'll admit that it takes a little while to get used to, but I find myself missing the rain nearing the end of summer. It's nice to chill for a bit.

Everyone has their own conception of miserable though, and for me the rain barely registers since I'm from any other part of Canada; no, sunny and extremely cold winters are not superior

San Diego

Pros: Best Mexican food in the country, proximity to Mexico, beaches, biotech (if that’s your industry), weather, laid back, great zoo, people are generally active.

Cons: Very expensive CoL relative to income (“sunshine tax”: despite the same if not higher housing costs than other west coast cities, salaries are comparatively lower), not the best tech scene (e.g. tech meet up events hard to come by), tourist season can have bad traffic, people who purchase second/third homes here.

Pro/con depending on who you ask: everything is 15 minutes away from everywhere (unless you’re at the peripherals).

Have you found any tech meetups here that were worth it? I find myself agreeing that the tech scene is a bit lacking (I only have a few tech-minded friends) but then again I haven't really made much effort to look around.
Gilbert, Arizona

Pros:

Often ranked a top places to live in the US. Very safe for families. Day trip access to Ocean/Snow/Lakes/Mountains. Lots of good food to discover. Relatively cheap CoL. No snow.

Cons:

A car is absolutely mandatory. The purge June-Aug. Everyone is moving here. CoL is rising quickly. The sprawl can make hobby/tech meetups inconvenient to attend.

Day trip to ocean - where? Looks like San Diego is at least 6 hrs away. Definitely fair for a weekend trip
Day-trip wasn't the right word. That said, RockyPoint Mexico is 3hrs~.
I lived in Phoenix for 20+ years, I think you're really underselling how hot it is from May thru October. Be prepared to spend 95% of your time inside air conditioning in that time period.
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