Show HN: Just Launched an App for Dads
First time posting on HN. We're looking for feedback from parents.
We're 2 dads who started working on Dadditude in the midst of covid lockdowns last year.
Being a dad can be a long, emotional, draining, and lonely journey. Through our research we learned that dads want to improve their parenting but are too shy to ask for help, and are tired of reading content online written for mums. We set out to fix that and create a platform that would help dads feel seen, validated, and supported. By helping dads, we hope to support moms and partners too, because all parents deserve more support.
Quick timeline so far: We started a community of dads on Instagram last Feb to test hypothesis and learn about their needs. We then launched an MVP in April, a super simple app serving weekly coaching guides created with a parenting professional partner. We made several updates in summer and fall, working like crazy in the background to convince parenting professionals to write coaching guides for us. Especially hard when you're a nobody. But people are kind and we found all the support we needed. We launched a v1 app mid-December with 50 coaching guides and a more full fledge community board (and a paid membership tier). We've just added on-demand parenting professional support in Jan. And last week added a picture board for dads to upload pics of their families, and that's become more popular than the forums!! ← I knew dads wanted to feel more visible but I love these discoveries!
Super proud of the work done so far, but still so much to do to smooth out the product experience, and get closer to PFM. So much learning.
web: http://www.dadditude.app ios: https://apps.apple.com/app/id1558653576 android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.dadditude....
(part of the experience is behind a paywall, but you can test nearly all paid features once for free - so long as you register through Apple or Google)
All thoughts and feedback welcome in the comments below, especially if you're a parent entrepreneur. TYIA
[edited top statement to "can be long..." for the dads here who felt it was too gloomy - it was]
145 comments
[ 3.1 ms ] story [ 226 ms ] threadWe're working on new features that will make part of the experience more guided, and we'll focus on dads that want to work to improve their mental wellbeing and parenting. Sort of a guided micro journaling, with specific commitments around specific dad skills.
Except, it isn't. I was excited that you have a web link, only it's a link that allows you to download the app. I don't want an app. I just want the content.
Is there any plan to ever publish the content you're having generated by any other means? Why not put it directly on the website?
I won't start using an app that doesn't let me do anything useful without paying, and I'm not going to sign up for a service if I don't know what I'm paying for, so I always look for that information up front before I even install.
I was put off that I have to create an account before seeing more than just the introduction to a guide, and that at that decision point I have no idea how much the paid membership will be. Please don't hide the ball and hope to hook people. If this is $5/year, I'd go through the sign up process and see how it looks. But if it's $15/month, I wouldn't spend the time trying it out because there's an incredibly small chance that I'd end up wanting to pay that much.
Honestly it looks like most of the content is just stuff gathered from the web (or very similar to content that is free on the web), which also tempers my interest. Some people might be interested in posting public photos of their kids, but I'd never do this in a public app. Maybe I'm not in the target audience, or I'm misunderstanding. But I'm a dad and entrepreneur, so I was curious enough to check this out. Just my 2 cents!
Guide paywall, well, we offer the first guide for free so long as you register. The copy mentions that BUT it's not clear enough apparently. We'll need to work on this more. And then again, maybe the first guide is all free without registration but felt like the notice would help people choose the guide they wanted. Back to the drawing board on this one! Again, we should be clearer from the get go
Content of the guides: I see what you mean. 80% of the content is written in collaboration with parenting pros for the app, 20% is reformatted with the help of the original writers. Sure, you could find similar content online but it wouldn't be written specifically 'for dads' and we know that most dads don't look for that content online because it's a flood of crappy content written for mums. We're trying to be very specific here.
Thanks for your feedback!
Oh no, this is clear. The point is that you don't tell me what the price will be, and I don't create accounts for apps/websites that are going to charge me an indeterminate amount of money later on.
> Sure, you could find similar content online but it wouldn't be written specifically 'for dads' and we know that most dads don't look for that content online because it's a flood of crappy content written for mums.
All you have to do is add +dad in your web search, right?
As dads are finally becoming academic research subjects over the last 10 years, we're learning more about the impact of fatherhood on their body/brains, how support needs to be more specific to dads, how their impact on their kids' growth is different from mums'.
But I'll say that most dads we've spoken to over the past year, after having felt invisible in their perinatal journey (or considered like "the lesser parent"), have said that they wanted some validation and wanted to read articles that would refer to them as 'dads' and talk about them dads. That's also why there is a section in the app that aggregates media articles written about fatherhood.
s/we're/some fathers
This isn't universal. Please don't present it as such.
This is a strong, negative and questionable statement.
This is also something that could be spoken from the perspective of that person.
"Being a dad is a long, emotional, draining, and lonely journey _for me_."
Perhaps the context here is that of single fathers?
Being a dad is fire and ice. Some wonderful times, some hard times. Not lonely at all. I get to help good, small people become good, big people, and I grow along the way.
Of course it's long, it's something you start often in your 20s or 30s and hopefully do for the rest of your life.
Of course it's emotional. It's one of the largest life experiences many of us will go through.
Of course it can be draining at times. It takes a lot out of you, and it can be hard after
Painting people as helpless and pathetic because they're finding something hard and still doing it and while seeking help to improve seems ridiculous.
Perhaps the issue people are having with this is that they're inserting "and not worth it" or "not rewarding" at the end, which isn't there. With "but worth it" added, would so many of you disagree?
Draining can be seen as negative but, if you see it in the same vein as "working on complex problems all day is mentally draining" (which is how I assume it was meant), then it loses that negative connotation.
That really only leaves lonely. When you consider how many moms groups there are, all boosting each other up with discussions of how wonderful they are (and, in some contexts, reassurance that they're not bad moms because of something)... dads (in general) are lonelier; they just don't have as much available support. It's not like that for all dads but, as a group trend overall, I'd say it's a fact.
Also... > Being a dad is a long, emotional, draining, and lonely journey.
Paints being a Dad as something I've not experienced. So perhaps your app isn't for me.
And your website doesn't include a cookie banner, instead just begins tracking me through Google. So you don't meet your own GDPR statement in your privacy policy.
Hard pass.
Cookie banner, apologies, we're fixing this. No harm intended. We actually track as little as possible.
You lost me there.
> get your ass to a qualified and experienced therapist and work through your issues, rather than turning to an online support group for answers
If you're feeling bad, do this arbitrary thing instead of this other arbitrary thing to fix it. Alright.
Becoming a father was the best decision I ever made. The duty of fatherhood has made me a tenfold better man.
Fatherhood is not a bitter load to be carried. It is the greatest responsibility you will ever face, the true test of your character, and a duty to be met with great joy, energy, and devotion.
> Fatherhood is not a bitter load to be carried. It is the greatest responsibility you will ever face, the true test of your character, and a duty to be met with great joy, energy, and devotion.
None of these are mutually exclusive. The idea in our culture that something is either all good, or all bad, is an incredibly shallow way of experiencing life. Fatherhood is fantastic, and it's also difficult. There are times it is wonderful, and there are times it is terrible. It's both. Don't try to reduce everything into a one dimensional caricature, otherwise once you find a negative you can't explain away, you'll revert to the "this is horrible, it's only horrible", which is just as wrong.
> This is clearly written for the beta male audience, and I don't care if I'm roasted over that statement
Exactly, that's what we need labelling people.
> so you can be the strongest person for your children
You don't need to be strongest person all the time. You don't and you can't if you think that you are being that I am sorry you are wrong. And if you actually are being that, then you are basically setting up your kids to always show a strong face even when something's crazy wrong. YOU DON'T WANT THAT.
Hey everyone loves their children, but to assume everyone loves their children exactly way you love yours is being exceptionally naive.
Also, I don't agree that "any content is useful". Men and women are different, and maybe I will get roasted for this, but it's true. The life experience and sensibilities of men and women can be very different, and only having access to a mother's perspective (which also happens to be the mainstream-approved perspective) is inadvertently gaslighting; if a father naturally has certain male perspectives on raising a family but the mommy blogs they read tell them otherwise, that's very alienating.
I generally agree with your sentiment (though find it a bit inflammatory for no real reason), but what on earth is wrong with online support groups? These are extremely effective for lots and lots of people.
Honestly it sounds like you may be the one who should seek therapy.
You wrote this three days ago. Is parenting after day drinking to excess what one should consider the antithesis of "beta male" behavior?
Here's the original reply for context: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30133543
Dad-tip: if this were selling a "4-minute dad" approach it would be up my alley. As in, give me a digest of all the books my wife is reading about parenting, so she doesn't have to. Help me schedule time to consume it (before bed is good for me).
4-minute dad: you can literally read parts of guides for 4 minutes and then get back to your life.
Parenting book digests: spoiler alert, we're working on it... in 3 weeks if all goes well. But only with the paid membership.
“I don’t want to talk to people about it, I don’t want to read books about it, I don’t want to connect with anyone about anything in any app, but I’d like to get nuggets of science-backed info about how to be a better dad.”
Thanks for sharing these details about Italy. I had no idea. Is it the same for moms there?
Dad of more than one severely handicapped kid here. I have found the journey the greatest part of my life for going on 25 years. Not at all draining or lonely, and, because of our children, filled with joy even on days when there was tragedy.
Not trying to dis OP or the work they have done.
I will say that I was initially a bit confused by the web page; it took me a minute of looking around for a register/login link, for sample guides, or for the community boards... before I realized that the web page is just a brochure for the mobile apps and a place to link your 'gram. I prefer to consume long-form content on my PC rather than my phone, so that was a bit of a disappointment.
On downloading the Android app, I was greeted with this error message:
https://i.imgur.com/gi0MfZz.png
Hopefully that's just HN's Dad hug of doom (I'm on solid wifi and have a great network connection; it's almost certainly not on my end as the message implies).
Starting to page through the app now; looks like you have lots of content! I'll let you know when I have more time to really dig into a few articles and the features.
Another place I go to for Dadditude-like conversations is https://www.reddit.com/r/daddit. We do have a very limited policy for self-promotion, see https://www.reddit.com/r/daddit/wiki/blogs for details (or message the mods), in particular self-promotion should be <<10% of your content. But if you are already a redditor who wants to help fathers you're probably already there, encouraging and commiserating with us over people who call dads parenting 'babysitting', cleaning up the messes of our kids, and trying to be better dads...
PS: I'll echo and slightly disagree with the sibling commenter who was distracted by the first paragraph of your pitch: "Being a dad is a long, emotional, draining, and lonely journey. Through our research we learned that dads want to improve their parenting but are too shy to ask for help, and are tired of reading content online written for mums. We set out to fix that and create a platform that would help dads feel seen, validated, and supported."
Wow, that's a depressing framing to everything that follows. Try something more positive, and be willing to qualify it with some weasel words where you have to: Being a Dad should be an rewarding, amazing, fulfilling, awesome journey, that has commensurately high challenges and requirements, and it can sometimes feel draining or lonely. Asking for help is hard, and it's difficult to find quality, precise help when you do ask. We want to help dads be the best Dads they can be, recognize the work they're putting in, and support them in the important role they have in their families.
Good luck!
Remember SOS:
S = Self-awareness. You need a sense of your own insecurities, biases and an awareness of your feelings.
O = Objectivity. With that self-awareness hopefully comes objectivity. The ability to look at the world from your child's perspective and not in a manner governed by your own ambitions, dreams, fears and hopes.
S = Selflessness. This can be the grueling part. Sacrificing other priorities (sleep, work, wind down time, personal interests) to support your child in their interests, with their difficulties, and often to expose them to different activities and ideas so they can identify what is right for them.
My kids are older now, but I still run down this list frequently in my mind as a way of ensuring I am preparing the kids for life in age appropriate and healthy ways.
> and not in a manner governed by your own ambitions, dreams, fears and hopes.
and emotions, personal childhood trauma, stress...
We have some great content on "Parenting Blindspots".
r/daddit: I'm a long time lurker and I'm so grateful for this resource. Sounds like you're quite involved there. Thank you! I've wondered how I could introduce Dadditude there but I think I prefer to wait until the offering is more differentiated. Unless you think there is a way to do it now.
Thank you for the rephrasing suggestions, that is so helpful and I'll definitely incorporate some of this next time I pitch. I love the concept of weasel words (as a non-native speaker).
I guess this was autocorrect, did you mean "good" or something else?
https://twitter.com/drantbradley
For me, after I had kids, almost all my non-work social interaction was with parents of other kids who were involved in the same activities.
No, once you are a parent, you are not spending Friday night at a bar with your buddies. That part of your life is over (at least until your kids are grown).
You can be "lonely in a context" without being existentially lonely (though that's a very normal human experience also). Loneliness just means that at the present time, you don't know enough people who you can relate to in a certain context. You may have a million friends, but if you want to start a new career, you may be lonely in that context and feel the need to know more people in that industry. If you are newly diagnosed with a disease, you may be lonely in that context, not knowing anyone else who has been through the symptoms you're experiencing, even if you are surrounded by supportive family. And if you're a new dad or mom, you may have your spouse, you may have your kids, but you can absolutely feel the need to connect with other people who have experienced what you're experiencing.
Loneliness is just your emotions telling you that you could benefit from the presence of people who have travelled and are traveling the same road. It isn't a failing. It's fuel to reach out and connect.
The thing that myself and others found so disagreeable is that your copy sounded… maybe “whiny” is the right word?
It reminded me of the “buddy dad” that cares more about his kids thinking of him as a “best friend”, than being a father. Those are very different things.
Maybe your copy is right for your audience, depending on your goals, but it stuck a strong negative chord for me.
Email in profile, by the way. Happy to iterate and provide direct feedback, as fathers do need good resources.
This statement seems like a useful filter for finding your target audience.